Picking up from yesterday –
So, if you have a funny partner who happened to say something awesome and hilarious (after you played this somewhat cruel and a bit juvenile text message joke on them), and they gave you permission to share their cool-ness with twitter – fine.
But some of those responses were so embarrassing to the person sending them! There were straight up freak outs that unraveled within a matter of moments.
It made me reflect a little on how I might react if someone I love sent that to me.
First off, I think 99% of the people I love are cool enough to not play that “joke” on me. But, if someone did text me saying “I haven’t been completely honest with you,” thinking it would be funny; I honestly believe that I would react to a person I love with, “Are you okay?” “Do you need help?” Do you need me to come over?” “Whatever it is, I got your back” – or generally stuff along those lines.
But I know I have overreacted to things in my life. And that total freak out, screaming over a text message girl lives inside of me. I started to think about people from my past to whom I’d have that sort of reaction.
And the one thing they all had in common was that I didn’t really trust (or love) them in the first place. (Why were they in my life? I don’t know. Good question. Sometimes I make bad decisions. Sometimes I’m just kind of figuring stuff and people out…)
A lot of the responses that were freak outs basically revolved around wondering if the dishonesty had to do with cheating or contracting something. Sometimes the person already had the possible tryst partner in mind. “Is it that girl from the office?!” “That guy from the gym?”
And I felt so bad for these people in these toxic relationships. Because if you’re with the type of person that makes your first thought, “He/she cheated on me!” “He/she gave me a virus!” – my feeling is you shouldn’t be with that person.
I mean, I’m no relationship counselor or anything. But if that’s your first inclination, then that’s probably a seed that’s always in your mind. And how is that person treating you if you’re constantly wondering if they’re being faithful, if they’re respecting you, if they’re loving you.
If this little stunt made me think about anything (other than internet privacy and the great reminder that we really need to be as respectful as we can online), it’s the relationships we allow in our lives. That can be friends, family, or significant others.
If the moment trouble starts brewing, our very first response is, “Oh goodness, what has this person done to me?” instead of, “My love! What’s happened and how can I help him/her?” – it might be time to reevaluate if that person is worthy of a spot in our lives.
I do believe we should respect all people and have a general love for fellow humans – but whether we allow them to take our energy and be a confidant, or whether we just respect them from afar is a choice we should try to make wisely.
You never, ever deserve someone who is mistreating you. And don’t let any amount of insecurity or manipulation make you think you do. If you’re one of the people who had the untrusting tweets – or if you would’ve been had you been in that situation, I really hope you can grow to respect yourself more.
It’s a journey for sure. And we all make mistakes. But let’s let this horrible twitter stunt remind us to re-evaluate our lives now and again, and to try to take a stand for what we deserve (and to appreciate it more when we have exactly that).