Picking up from last time –
Now let’s talk about the food I ate – the terrible way in which I tortured my body.
For the first few days I continued to count my calories – just eating mainly foods that are not my main staples… and staying away from everything that was.
Did you know that in some of my vegan microwavable meals, there are 11 grams of protein for only 300 or so calories?! That seemed like too many for what I was going for. So those were out.
Even just packets of vegetables. I was practically yelling in the store as I’d pick up mushrooms and read how many billions of grams of protein were in them. “Gah! Forget you, mushrooms!” (I mean, not really, ’cause I love you. But aaaaargh my favorite foods are making me upset during this time.)
As time went on, I got hungry. So hungry. And I was so tired (from all the not working out and my lack of protein). So… what to do when I’m hungry and tired and cranky?
I know. How about I stuff my face with sugar! Sounds like a great idea, don’t you think?
Did you know frosting is vegan and has 0 grams of protein? Oh yeah. That’s right. I most definitely did eat an entire tub of frosting. It wasn’t all in one sitting. And at first, it actually kind of hurt to eat. But a couple of days later, when I got to the bottom of the tub, I was licking out the last bits of it.
What am I doing to myself here?! My skin is breaking out. I’m feeling bloated and gross.
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. Everything hurts.
That’s when I went back and read my entry about hearing the news that I was denied as a kidney donor, and how sad it made me. I thought about how much I wanted to do this for someone else. So, I suppose this sacrifice was worth it.
And yes, I will totally admit a couple of things:
1) I’m sure I went overboard. Did I really have to try for 9 days? Did I really have to eat sooo little protein? No. I didn’t. But after the last test, I was so very nervous. And I just wanted to be so sure.
2) There have to be ways to eat a low protein diet better than just eating a can of frosting. So, I was being a little dumb and a little ridiculous. I will grant you those things without argument.
As my 9 or so days went by, every morning I’d say, “Only x days to Thursday.” And finally, eventually, somehow Thursday came. It seemed nearly impossible, but alas, it happened!
And this is where I’ll pick up next time.