My Downfall At BMI – Part 11 (Assigned to Composer Number 4)

Saturday, February 13th, 2016

Picking up from last time –

This was also around the time that when the moderators were calling on people by name they said, “You in the back,” when I decided to maybe try to add something.

It’s possible they don’t even know my name!

Granted, in all of this ridiculous downfall business, it might be better that way…

For my next assignment, I was paired up with this guy who’s been making fun of me a little since the beginning.

Rewind back to 2009. I was in the hospital for heart stuff with lots of time on my hands, and one of my professors convinced me Facebook was a good professional tool. I finally broke down and got one (after fighting it off for oh so long).

I was still sort of figuring it out, and didn’t know 100% how it worked, so I would friend random people – anyone involved in theater, really. And usually I’d write a little message to go along just like, “Hey, I’m used to Facebook and just making friends. We have all this cool stuff in common” (or something like that).

Can I just reiterate that I had a lot of time on my hands in the hospital bed – and also that I have kind of an obsessive personality that has to get everything “right” – including making sure I get to 1,000 Facebook friends post haste (though I guess that doesn’t really matter).

Anyway, I know I’m already coming across defensive here… because I am.

All those years ago, this guy got one of those messages from me – and he still remembers it! So he kind of loves to tell that story. I sort of think he maybe means it in jest, but it kind of has a bite to it when he does it (or at least it feels like it does). So, it makes me feel kind of embarrassed to hear it – especially when (if you remember) I said he found me 0% charming. So, I’m not totally sure that he does like me.

Well, I have to say, after the way I acted, I’m not positive he’d like me either.

For one thing, I was really indecisive. I gave him a list of places I thought might work. Really, I kind of wanted to write one idea, but I gave options. (This is the first mistake. If I really want to do one, I should probably go with that one, not give a number of options.)

And this is where we’ll pick up next time with even more mistakes! (Woot!)

I'd love to hear from you! So whaddya say?