[Yes, ANOTHER back-dated post. I’m trying to get there, and we’re getting closer everyday!]
Aye aye aye aye aye.
Looking back on the 2015 year in review, it’s interesting, ’cause it looks like, “Wow, look at how great and strong all my pillars are!”
And then I move to New York, and I feel like they all fell apart. BMI’s a freaking mess. So much for that creative pillar doing well.
My running is also a mess. I’m working allllll the time. And when I’m not working, I’m still kind of trying to settle in. (There are still boxes that haven’t been unpacked.) And if I’m not doing that, then I’m usually at least attempting to write songs at BMI. And I know those are just a bunch of excuses. But the point is. I’m feeling a little fat and not great… So much for that athletic pillar! (Gah!)
The “smarts” – still a joke as it was then.
Volunteering? Nope. Haven’t really done any of that.
Here I was thinking my pillars were strong. Then they were tested… And maybe they’re not as strong as I thought… And that’s stressful. And a bummer. I thought I’d been doing so much work over the past few years, becoming a version of myself I liked more and more. Is that so easily tumbled down?
On a side note, I think I perhaps should add another pillar (or expand the definition of the community pillar?), because I don’t think I’ve been being a fantastic friend over the past few months. Birthday cards and thank you cards have gone unsent. I haven’t been awesome about asking people what they’re up to. I’ve been kind of selfish in various ways. And that makes me sad… So, it’s not just about the community out there. What about your internal community, you know? I dunno…
I’m just postulating sadly over here… I have no idea what I’m doing. (But at least let’s try to sing it in the fun way like they do in Up Here. “Iiiiiiiiii have no idea what I’m doing!”