It’s so weird, right?
I talked about missing it in December, and that feeling hasn’t gone away(!).
(Though I will say that pep talk this weekend suuuuuper helped!)
When I was in LA, I talked about how it could be lonely sometimes because people didn’t necessarily like to go out and do things, as everyone was so exhausted all the time from the hot sun and the hustling to get jobs, and no one wanted to go out in traffic.
It’s not like I was constantly out with 40 million friends, and I’m not under the false assumption that I was…
I complained about the smog and the sun (the hot sun!), the lack of public transportation, the fake-ness, all of that… I couldn’t wait to leave.
And now I miss it all the time. When I had my toughest Friday since I’ve been here, I got up Saturday morning and packed for LA. My gut reaction when something went wrong was to immediately go home for the weekend.
‘Cause I miss it. And I’m not 100% sure why…
Is it because in a sense everything was so much easier there? I didn’t have to worry about a lot. My job wasn’t that demanding. My apartment was cheap enough that even if I went for months without working, I could afford a nice life…
There are so many shows in Los Angeles, you could be pretty certain that when you need a job you could have a job. There wasn’t a lot of like survival stress, which I think there is out here. (If anything were to happen to my show or my job, I’m in trubs.)
In LA, I had tons of workout places I loved, and a gym in my building. (The ease of working out – both with available time, and with so many semi-convenient favorite workout places available – I think really was a humongous thing for me.)
And I’ll pick up with more thoughts tomorrow.