I know that’s kind of a cop out way to start anything.
I know that often times when something bad happens to someone, we get through it by saying, “It was one of the best things that ever happened to me. Look at all these wonderful things that happened that wouldn’t have happened had it not been for that awful thing.”
I’ve done it before (mainly with open-heart surgery). I think(?) a lot of us do it.
And I know it’s silly, because had the really bad thing not happened, it’s possible the good stuff would’ve still happened – it just would’ve come about in a different way. Or it’s possible equally good stuff (or even better stuff) would’ve happened. So, you know, we don’t know.
But here’s what I do know…
When I got offered the editor job at work, I could only take it if I prioritized it over BMI. It wasn’t that I had to quit BMI – but I might have to. And I had to know that if it came to it, I would.
And even with BMI going worse than ever, I *still* thought all weekend long about my decision – weighing everything so hard. And I still thought about saying no – as crazy insane as that is.
As I toiled over my decision, flipping my inner-monologue back and forth all the time, I did think to myself, “You still have time at BMI! It’s not necessarily over! You could turn it around. You have applied for 6 years! Don’t you want to give this every single thing you have? Even working as an assistant editor in the Jon Stewart family is incredibly cool. And you make enough money to live. Maybe just keep doing that?”
I mean, that was a thought I had when BMI was a mess for me! Imagine if BMI had been everything I’d dreamed of. I believe 100% that I would’ve thanked my boss for her kindness and for believing in me. And I would’ve told her that the AE job was best for me now…
And I LOVE my job as an editor. I loooooooooooooove it. There are not enough words to describe how happy I am and how much I adore it. I love everything about it (as I have mentioned many times on this blog). I am ridiculously happy going to work day in and day out.
And I think it very well might open a lot of doors for my career. In fact, I’ve already gotten to have meetings and conversations and all that jazz with people I probably wouldn’t have been able to before. But now I can, because I’m an editor on The Nightly Show.
In the end, the way things look now, I still get to do BMI. And I get to have one of the jobs of a lifetime. So, if I had to go through this upsetting failure part to do that… Well, I can’t imagine not having the job I have. So, as I said in the title, I think (as weird and unfortunate and almost painful as it is to say) failing BMI is one of the best things that could’ve happened to me…