[This was a post for May 1… See? I’m getting *closer* to current, even if not there…]
Going back to my little LA spring break…
I got asked this all the time while I was in LA – all the time.
And I know the correct answer is, “I love it! I love it so hard. It’s the best.”
But my answer is kind of “the jury’s still out.”
I mean, of course I love New York… It’s New York. It’s my dream come to life! I work in the freaking Jon Stewart family! And that’s incredible! And I live alone! In freaking midtown Manhattan!!! How much more could a girl want, right?
…
But I just… I feel like I’ve failed so much this year. And I know I’ve been all over the place about it and everything. And I know we’ve talked about BMI at length… I just… I can’t separate it all in my head – BMI, personal failures, rough patches, what have you and New York and moving… And I just – I just don’t know.
And it’s so weird. Because I want to be the girl who’s doing it up soooo amazingly, and who’s loving every moment of it… I mean, everybody asks. And I love to be positive. And I love to love things. And I have always LOVED New York. (Go check any of the past entries in this blog before I moved there in September of last year… or ask my roommate in Brooklyn from years ago, when I worked as an elf at Macy’s Herald Square and popped my eyes open every morning like a musical theater character who got out of bed like she was gliding because I started every single morning with “I can’t believe I woke up in New York” – even when I had to get up at 3:30 or 4am to get to work on time.
I want to show that joy to people!
So, it’s awkward coming back. I never know what to say to people.
…But one thing’s for certain… and that’s that I have learned to love LA! (Haha!)