Being Sexually Assaulted Has Made Me Question Core Things That I Really Believe…

March 22, 2017

I had said so many times, “You are who you decide to be.” (I even said that when I spun the wheel on The Price is Right!”

When I had like 45 seconds to say something to the world, that was what I said – you are who you decide to be.

And I beliiiiiiieved that wholeheartedly. (Go read that post, if you didn’t click on it already.)

I also have said over and over and over that attitude is like 90% of life, or something like that. And I believed that too!

And I actually still believe both of those things…

And there are days where I think “I am what I decide to be! And I want to be a runner! I’ll go running.” But then I get a flashback as my mind wanders, and I stop and I go cry or something.

I keep getting distracted. Or having flashbacks. Or just being generally angry.

I am trying to keep living my normal life. I am trying to have a good attitude and be strong. But I falter… a LOT. A lot, a lot…

And in therapy we work on grounding tools. And we work on processing… Heck, we work on a lot of stuff. Because I still believe in the ideas of attitude is so much, and you decide you are.

But I am struggling with those things in an actionable sense right now. And I sort of kind of wonder if perhaps I oversimplified those ideas… I mean, I think they are simple and true ideas… I am just struggling with the execution of them for now.

I'd love to hear from you! So whaddya say?