I Think A Goal Of Mine Potentially Should Be To Never Ever Talk About A Person’s Weight

Thursday, June 1st, 2017

[I’m still gonna talk about my *own* weight… I actually have a post coming up, probably later today, about my own weight. But goodness, gracious. Here I am writing about how I’m treating talking about other people’s weights.]

I’ve been hearing way too much about Rihanna’s weight lately, and even the crowd that “celebrates” it is making me very uncomfortable. I feel bad even linking to it, but there was this article from Buzzfeed.

If an article starts off with an insult, but they tell you, “it’s not an insult…” it’s probably still an insult? I’d think the reason they have to specifically tell you, “This is not an insult,” is because it smacks of something that’s an insult.

I can’t believe people are letting her weight gain define her so much that they’re even nicknaming her “Thickanna” – changing her own name to reflect her weight?

Uh uh. No. Gross.

I mean, I don’t know if Rihanna specifically is upset by this. By my estimate, Rihanna is a whoooole lot stronger than I am. So, she is probably unfazed, because she’s pretty awesome. Also, maybe she actually likes that label. I dunno. So, I’m not trying to tell anyone how Rihanna should feel.

But I know for me, I would be wanting to crawl into a hole and praying for sweet death. If I were here, I don’t know that I would want to leave my house.

I am a civilian (a non-celebrity who conceivably doesn’t have people watching her every move), and even I already am hesitant about leaving my house having gained a few pounds because I don’t wanna feel embarrassed…

Imagine having people just waiting to take photos of you, and then changing your name in the lexicon to reflect your weight. Oh goodness, gracious, no.

So, because some people might take thick as a compliment (I generally hate it, but I jumped on a hashtag *one* time to show off my *shivers* “thick” thighs), and because people actually might not take thin as a compliment, it’s maybe better not to say anything at all?

Recently, I’ve been reading a lot more stories about people who are very ill and lost a ton of weight through treatment of serious diseases. And they don’t like being told how amazing it is that they’re so thin, because it’s reminding them of chemotherapy, or not being able to eat, or whatever it is they’re going through.

So maybe… Just maybe… I keep my mouth shut completely and never mention a persons weight one way or another unless they very specifically bring it up and tell me they’re excited they lost or gained weight?

I dunno. I just – I am perturbed by all this Rihanna talk. And it’s making me think about how often I make little comments – whether good or bad about people’s weights/appearances… And it needs to stop (in my opinion).

4 thoughts on “I Think A Goal Of Mine Potentially Should Be To Never Ever Talk About A Person’s Weight

  1. Kevin

    Seems to me that it sometimes can be OK to comment about weight of folks in our inner circle (partner, close friends, family). Otherwise, yeah, best if we all shut up–someone else’s physical form isn’t about you.

    1. Aurora De Lucia Post author

      I meeeeean, yes, probably? Like, yes. I love feeling thin and beautiful. And yes, I have loved it if a man I’m intimately involved with makes a comment about how tiny I am… Actually, let’s get real. I love it when male friends whom I’ve never even kissed tell me how tiny I am hahahaha. I love it when people on twitter tell me how tiny I am! So, typing this, I’m realizing maybe I’m not the barometer actually. hahaha…

      I just – I dunno. I guess everyone is different. And also, a real compliment that you know someone would like to hear is nice… But… I don’t think I’d want to say, “Have you gained a little weight?” to someone, no matter how much I know them… Not unless their weight is getting so out of control (in either direction) that I am legitimately, seriously worried about their health… Otherwise, I think sometimes even with my good female friends, the first thing out of my mouth is, “Daaaaang! You are looking so good! Have you lost weight?”

      And it seems like a compliment (and is meant as one)… But even if I know them super well, they mean more to me (and the world) than their appearance, and I don’t know that I always reflect that in my words (of what I say first or loudest or most etc.)…

      (I don’t know if anything I just said makes sense… Aye aye aye aye aye! :-P)

  2. Kevin

    Notice, though, that all the people you say you enjoy comments from are friends, or at least twitter-friends. Plus with you constantly posting about running marathons it’s pretty clear where any weight loss comes from, Ms. Power-Athlete!

    But you’re certainly right that it’s complicated!

    1. Aurora De Lucia Post author

      I mean, that is true… But no matter how close I am with someone, I don’t think I’d love it if they were like, “Oof, girl. You look fat in that photo!” or anything alone those lines. I think that’d be annoying no matter who it’s coming from…


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