I know that I have talked about my relationship with New York at length – partially because it is exceptionally important to me. Also, I used to think it could never change.
And it was, to me at least, the weirdest part of my life that got turned upside down, and seemed like I could not come back from (when it came to the whole assault debacle).
How could my view on the city chang so much? I don’t know. It’s confusing (which is partially why I’ve talked about it so much).
And I know that recovery from all the assault/trauma/PTSD stuff doesn’t happen overnight. I mean, I know that. [I literally have a post in the queue about it.]
Yet, I was still surprised when I looked around my life yesterday and thought about how much stuff I put off, until I get to California.
Intellectually and logistically I knew this. (I’ve even made fun of myself for this.)
But as I sit in my LA apartment (as that’s where I’ve been during this week of hiatus), and I’m checking off all this logistical-type stuff from a list, it seems at least slightly ridiculous that I BROUGHT ALL MY DRY CLEANING HOME just so I could get it done at the “dry cleaners I like.” …What?!
It wasn’t that giant of a deal. I was able to fit everything in my carry on. But, what, New York doesn’t have dry cleaning in the whole entire city? (Hint: it does! It has lots! Even if you don’t wanna lug all your stuff through Times Square (where I live), there are like 40 bajillion different apps you could try to pick up and deliver.) And my easy solution is to just take it to… Los Angeles? (Aye aye aye))
I’ve been wanting to get my hair dyed for 40,000 years. (That’s an exaggeration, but you get the point.) I don’t like when it lightens too much. I prefer a darker brown to the blonde-ish shade my hair seems to inevitably become with enough time outdoors in the sun.
And I waited and did it while I was in LA. And the kicker is, with this one, you could argue that once you find a hairstylist, you keep them… But my hairstylist quit! She doesn’t even work at that salon anymore. Aaaaaand the salon itself happened to be closed down (for a remodel or something?) for the days I was there. So not only did I not have the person who’s patient enough to do my hair, I didn’t even go to the place I’m familiar with!
I merely wandered(!) into a place when I was down in Long Beach!
Could I not have easily wandered into a place in Manhattan with just as much of a chance of success?
I waited to give blood until the last time I was in LA. (Lamely, I didn’t have enough iron.) (And I’ll be trying again when I’m here again next weekend!)
Oh, and what is one of the reasons I’ll be in LA next weekend, again, you ask?
Well, my computer is taking longer to fix than originally thought. And I’ll have to come back and get it, won’t I? Could I not have taken my computer to the Apple Store on 5th Ave, or in Grand Central Station? (Both within walking distance of my NY place!)
Oh, oh, I could have, yes. But no. I waited ’til I got “home” to do all my errands.
Funnily enough, while I was having some problems with my computer, I kept thinking “I can just wait. I can just wait. I can wait until my next LA trip.” And now it’s to the point where it completely won’t turn on. Would anything have been different if I’d taken it in earlier? Maybe not. (But maybe!)
The point is, it seems a little silly to save this all for when I get “home.”
For one thing, it really procrastinates things in NY. For another, it’s kinda wasting my sweet precious LA time!
I might feel like “oh, I’m being so productive!” (And some things don’t take all that long. And I really do love that dry cleaner.) But like, I don’t get to hang out here all thaaaat often anymore. (I mean, I do and I don’t… But, anyway…) I should be going to museums, and hiking trails I haven’t experienced – not getting my hair dyed. Right?!
(I mean, to some extent. Also, I can do what I want. But… don’t I want to do that other stuff? And time is a finite resource…)
Aaaanyway, I’m tangenting, as per usual. The point is, I didn’t totally realize how *out of control* this LA stuff is until this trip. I mean, this is getting ridiculous. People at the Apple Store in NY will fix your computer. (The Apple Store in New York is where I bought my computer in the first place (when I was out there for a temporary job years ago).) Aye aye aye aye aye aye.
[oh, ps though, for as long as I live, as long as I am able, I will never change my dentist. I’ve been with my dentist longer than I’ve done pretty much anything else in my life… And also he is greeeeeat. So, I’m always gonna have at least a liiiiile piece of home, no matter what. (I hope!)]
[This is a part of the sexual assault series.]