A Silly Nachos Story In Belfast

Wednesday, August 16th, 2017

So, my new friend was taking me all around Belfast yesterday. (More on that soon, I’m sure!)

And we stopped off for a quick bite, and I got some nachos. I was gonna just eat them with salsa, but I learned that, to me, salsa in Ireland tastes like barbecue sauce. (Any other Americans out there feel the same, by chance? I wanna know if I’m crazy with that opinion.) So, I gave up on the salsa and went for the cheese.

And I had chips left when I ran out of cheese. So, I went to ask if I could have an extra container of cheese. And they would not give it. I offered to pay, of course, but they have a hard and fast rule, they do not sell a side of cheese by itself. So, then… a whole order of chips and cheese was only about 2 pounds. So, I was like, “okay, how about then I just order a whole complete order by itself. You guys can just keep the crisps part of it, because I don’t want anymore. And I’ll just take the cheese.”

“Oh, no. No. We can’t charge you 2 pounds for cheese!”

“…But you won’t let me buy it as a side?”

“Well, no, we don’t sell it by itself.”

“Okay, well, I’m just hungry still and I have all these uneaten crisps and they’re very good. I don’t mind paying the 2 pounds, and just takings the cheese.”

“But if we give you the cheese by itself, our ratio of crisps to cheese will be off.”

Now, I don’t reeeeally wanna take more crisps, because that feels pretty wasteful… And they don’t seem to particularly want to sell me a second order anyway. So, I give up and return to my seat and Victoria and I laugh as I recount the story to her…

Then we talk it over and decide I’m gonna go back up the counter and buy and buy a complete other order – crisps and all, and we’ll take the leftovers home and her roommate or one of us can eat them later.

I kid you not, when I went back up there and ordered another order, they said “would you like extra cheese?”

I almost burst out laughing!

“I’m sorry… Um… what?”

“Do you want some extra cheese? It costs 50p.”

What kind of Seinfeld sketch am I living in here?

Apparently there was this rule that they could give you cheese when you order it – only they have to put it directly on the crisps.

I found that out because she offered to put it directly on, but I didn’t want the crisps to get soggy, as we were gonna be saving some for later. So, I asked, “could you put the cheese on the side?” “Oh, no, extra cheese has to go over top of them.”

“But what if you just put the same amount you would be using just on the side instead?”

“No, extra cheese must go on top.”

So I gave up on extra cheese, and practically cackled with laughter when I got back to the table.

(And one of the things that made this so bewildering and funny is that originally when I thought it was just chips and salsa, basically, I didn’t even realize cheese came with them. I asked for extra salsa and they gave me an extra side with no problem.)

In conclusion, that was such a very silly hilarious fun restaurant story. I just wanted to share it as a little piece of my trip from Ireland!

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