Are we ever going to get out of number 29?
We will next time – but alas, still not this time.
This was the night of my mud run. I thought it might not be an awesome idea to volunteer later at night on the same day I had to do an obstacle course early in the morning. But my feeling was I’d take a nap. Well, I did not take a nap.
I finally got sleepy right around the time I needed to leave for the event. Eesh.
There was a big part of me that wanted to just say, “I ain’t coming!” But I’d already gotten follow-up emails, and even two phone calls (one very recently) confirming I’d be there. Flaking out is already totally horrible, but to do it when I’d been confirmed a million times – well, I just couldn’t do that.
So, I went to this night market right down the street from my apartment (that was the best part).
When I got the Human Rights Campaign booth, there were 6 of us working a 2-person table. I thought maybe it’d only be that way for a 1/2 hour of shift change. Alas, no.
Now, I have two modes. I am very energetic and outgoing and such, for sure. But sometimes, if I don’t feel like there’s a place for me, or if there are just a few too people around, I kind of turtle up a bit to give people room to take their space and do their thing. (I know. Excuses, excuses, right?)
I’m sure I looked so tired. I tried to get it together and look awake. But it was hard for me to feel engaged at a table where there wasn’t even room for everybody.
Since we were obviously overstaffed, I thought about asking if I could go home early. But I thought, “no! I cannot stay on #29 any longer. I just cannot. I will stick it out – even if that means I sit here and do nothing.”
I think the leader saw my not-quite-awakeness, ’cause he asked if I wanted to go home. I wasn’t trying to be rude or standoff-ish. It’s just hard to engage with people when your booth has way more people than the small groups that ever come over.
Since he seemed like he wanted me to go home, and I was worried my tiredness was bringing down the table, I went home, totally embarrassed.
I don’t get sent home from events! That’s not me. I’m a star! *puts hand under chin, looks up to the side [“bling” sound effect]* It was so embarrassing, and I hope to never think about it or experience it again. Eesh.