(my selfie waiting in Penn Station at a crazy time of morning)
As I was walking away from work (pretty late, when the building was basically closing (as I just kept trying to get more hours in and do more work)), I saw this big group of people get really (really, really, really super) excited about a bus stop ad for The Daily Show with Trevor Noah.
As I overheard them, I asked “Do you work on the Daily Show?” (The excitement + taking selfies with an ad + wearing a Daily Show sweatshirt kinda gave it away.)
They said yes(!). And I added “I work on The Nightly Show! Then they erupted with kind awesomeness, saying “Oh you’re like our cousin! Are you coming out with us? You are now!” (And I did!)
They were coming from a party celebrating Trevor Noah’s start as the host. And they were in the mood for fun.
We traversed around Times Square and went to a secret place. And I got to talk all night with these super interesting people.
After only 3 days, I feel so (SO) welcomed – like I really am a member of the Jon Stewart family.
When I drafted this post the next day, I ended with this: New York is magical. (If this happens to all be some kind of dream, and I’m in a coma – leave me there!)
And I just wanted to leave it there to preserve all the sweet, sweet joy.
I knew it wasn’t the *smartest* thing to go out with everyone when I had a million things to do and was so sleep deprived. But I also knew I kind of had to, ’cause… come on! When do you not hang out with the Daily Show crew?
At the time I was still staying out by Newark Airport. (Eesh.) So, by the time we actually got done, I’d missed the last train, and had to sit around ’til 4 or so in the morning… Worth it!
Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye. Where to even begin.
So, as you heard, I got the Nightly Show job. (Whaaaat?) Meaning it then became time to look for a place, ’cause you know, I gotta stay somewhere if I’m gonna work full-time, right?
I actually did a tiny bit of looking at apartments before my interview, just kinda like, “eh, I’m here, why not?”
And from the moment I walked out of the Nightly Show building, my apartment search got real!
All the horror stories I heard about looking for places in New York were true – realtors telling you they had a great place, just to say, “Oh, that one just left the market, but now that you’re here, let’s go to this other place” once you get there…
(Now, places do go quickly. So, I suppose it’s a possibility that that’s actually a real thing that just looks super bad. But it was annoying.)
I also was brought to a “two-room” place that was a studio. Granted, I only need a studio. But still! It was something I’d actually already seen. So it was a waste of everyone’s time. I hadn’t seen any two-room places, which is why I didn’t mention anywhere I’d been before to this realtor. She wasn’t showing me a studio, so why would I mention studios I’d seen? …Oh. Because she actually was showing me a studio.
Aye, aye, aye.
Of course every place was small. And expensive. Some were weirder than others. Some had cooler things than others.
There were some that didn’t even have bathrooms.
And there was legitimately a point where I asked myself, “Do I really neeeeed a bathroom?”
…Or should I pay more than I paid to live in my gorgeous LA place to still not have a bathroom?! (These are real questions I asked myself that of course seem silly now.)
Ultimately, the apartment I went with was the biggest studio I saw for the lowest price, and I found it the day after I started my job. (And it’s rent stabilized and within walking distance from work! So, I definitely lucked out there…)
I also learned that it seems like winter is the best time to move. I got in in October, which is still a pretty good time, but my understanding is that rents drop even a little lower once you get to November. Nonetheless, what I needed was open when I needed it. An that was lovely.
The realtor was nice enough to show it to me at night (when many realtors were all, “daytime only!” (which of course was hard, ’cause I was working a lot).
So, it seems like everything’s coming up roses! Or is it? (Well, it is pretty much. But goodness there was a bump in the road – which we’ll get to tomorrow.)
This is the part where I felt terrible… Well, terrible in a different way.
I felt all angry and grr about the dumb mistake I made. But now I felt terrible toward someone else [*hangs head in shame*].
There was this very sweet volunteer who was out in 101 degree heat, just giving us her time! And she greeted me so enthusiastically, trying to put a medal over my head. She seemed like the very sweetest.
And I was so mad at myself and the situation, I pretty gruffly said, “No thanks,” and walked right past her! (It is months later that this is posting, and I am still grimacing at how rude that was. I’m so very sorry, stranger!)
I went over to the medical tent, because my toe was bothering me a lot (and bleeding). So, I went to get a bandage. When the volunteer asked me about my race, I said I missed the turn [*grumpy, grumpy, grumpy*] And he said, “You’re not the only one! I’ve heard from a bunch of people today they missed the turn. The signage wasn’t good.”
I don’t know what percentage of that was trying to make me feel better, and what percentage was just straight truth.
Later, I checked the race’s Facebook page to see if maybe other people did have the same issue. And I saw people asking how many people were signed up vs. how many finished. People we’re all, “I tackled a marathon in 100 degree heat, and I want to know how many gave up and couldn’t handle it like I could.”
And it hurt! I was yelling to myself, “I can! I tried! I would have! Gah!”
Every time I saw a shirt that said “marathoner” in a workout class, I felt like a failure all over again. When it was weighing on my mind, it seemed to be the only thing I could concentrate on.
Also, I wondered if it would count as a DNF or just a half finish. In the Rock n Roll races, if you just run the half without saying anything, they automatically figure it out based on your timing mats and stuff, and give you a finish time for the half.
In this one, I think they were just gonna call you a quitter, but immediately after the race, I went to a tent and was like, “How do I get my time erased? I don’t want to remember this.” So, I’ve been erased completely.
As I complained and complained (like a very poor sport) to people I knew, people encouraged me to write in and complain about the signage. So I did write (in hopefully a nice way – esp since a little time had passed). I wasn’t the only one who missed it. But there weren’t many of us who wrote in.
I will say though, the Long Beach Marathon was amazing with customer service, because they gave me a free entry for next year – and they’re gonna mail me a half marathon medal.
It was unfortunate that I was an idiot and totally wasted my morning – when I could’ve felt so cool saying “I’ve done a marathon in a temperature over 100 degrees (and an ultramarathon in the hail!). I’m killing it y’all!” But no. Can’t say that… Yet.
So, I miss the turn and go on my merry way. I start to get a little nervous the closer I get to 13.1, but I figure I’ll find the turn at some point.
I get a little boost of possible confidence when I see a lit up sign that tells the marathoners about a turn. “Oh, that must be my turn.” I still have no idea what that sign meant because the turn was oh so long gone at that point.
When I got to basically the end of the race, there was a volunteer yelling, “Right this way! Turn this corner!” And I ran over. “What about the marathoners?” “Marathoners too! You’ve made it.” “Uh oh. I have not made it.”
Then I ran around ’til I found a volunteer who knew where the turn was. There was a volunteer who thought there’d be an extra golf cart to take me back to the turnaround…but he said I’d have to ask someone else. That person wasn’t sure. The next person said no, there wasn’t one.
I didn’t know what they did and didn’t have available… I mean, I’ve been toward the back of races many a time and seen several sag wagons ready to just roam around and give water and snacks. So, I feel like there’s often extra transportation. But it looks like not this time.
Obviously I wouldn’t want to take a vehicle that’s needed for medical situations or anything like that. So, with no vehicles available, I started hoofing back on foot. And then it’s weird ’cause everyone’s going by me looking at me weird. I mean, I’m off to the side not in the way, but still someone in a marathon bib, trucking back to where they’ve all been coming from.
I see that I’m not getting anywhere fast and I try to sort of hitchhike with a car in the lane of open traffic, but no cars will pay attention to me. Once I make it maybe a mile(?) or so, maybe?, I jump in one of those bike-pedaled carts that’s around. It’s not all that much faster than going by foot, but it’s still something.
We try to make it to the turn.
At this point, I’ve gone multiple miles out of the way (since I did 10.5 through 13, and also the mile-ish coming back toward the turn).
Since I was toward the back of the marathon crowd, I didn’t have that much time to lose.
The biker and I find the turnaround point, then we start to go farther, but that part of the course is being taken down. And we’re a little lost (as per usual, right?).
After a bunch of looking around and trying and thinking, and math-ing… We give up and he pedals me back toward the finish. I go to where I was before and finish the half marathon.
Please keep in mind – in case this helps to act as any excuse at all – that leading into this (half) marathon, a LOT was changing. I had to get rid of basically everything in my LA apartment to make room for another person. I was starting a new job, and apartment hunting in NY. (I’d actually finally just found one.) Things were moving faster than I could handle.
I still wanted to do this marathon, because I’ve promised myself I will do a marathon every year for the rest of my life (since my first one (in 2012)).
I think it was a little foolish to stick with this one specifically though. I didn’t pick it for any wildly crazy reason. I just chose it while I was living in Los Angeles because it was close and easy. When it became no longer close, I should’ve highly considered picking another one. But I was all, “No, no, no. I need to go back to pack anyway, blah blah blah.”
But I was exhausted. And I really didn’t have the time. It took up way too much of my Saturday to go down to Long Beach. (The blue line was under construction, so it took longer than usual.) And I was just thinking the whole time about how much packing I had to do. Oof.
I needed to sleep for approximately 1,400 hours. But instead, I rolled myself out of bed early Sunday morning to get down there.
I made a fateful mistake during the race… We didn’t run by a lot of establishments. It was a lot of the beach. The electrolyte drink was nuun, not Gatorade. The weather was legitimately over 100 degrees. I was going quite slowly. I didn’t need an electrolyte drink – or any other fuel, really – when I stopped around 10 1/2, running into a 7-11.
And yet, I went in. I was like, “I haven’t seen any place I could grab anything for miles. This may be my last chance in a while. Better do it now.” (The 7-11 didn’t even have Gatorade, btw!)
When I came out, I sort of looked around and even got a little confused because I thought I saw some cones to my right, but saw people running to my left.
A fun sign I saw along the route – “You run better than our government”
Well, if indeed I saw cones to my right, it’s because that’s where the marathon course went!
I should’ve studied the map. Really, the blame is on me.
There were some unfortunate circumstances though. Because of the heat, they allowed the half marathoners to start an hour and a half early (with us marathoners). Had the course not been quite so full of half marathoners at that point, it might’ve been a little helpful for me.
Also, usually races have someone at the turning point yelling out to turn. There’s often tons of signage just in case runners aren’t paying super attention. And I know we should be! Again, I can’t actually blame anybody but me. (But wouldn’t be great if I could a little? ;))
Sigh.
In my haste to get back on the course, I didn’t look too hard at where I was going or what I was doing.
My head was more darting around looking to see if another place had Gatorade. Then I just abandoned that idea because it didn’t seem to matter in that moment… But while my head was darting around at tops of stores, I missed the sign closer to the ground that said to turn. Guuuuh!
Every year I dress up as a different inspiring woman. I have considered Hillary Clinton a couple of different times at this point – including this race! She is killing it, running in the primaries. And she especially did a fantastic job in her Benghazi hearing mere days before this race. So, I really wanted to go as her from that hearing.
However – I did not realize this until I was trying to dress up as Hillary Clinton – she wears very specific pantsuits. It’s fairly easy to find women’s pantsuits, but it’s tough to find pantsuits that are cut like hers, in the specific colors and hues she wears.
On the plane home to Los Angeles (from New York) for the weekend, I was talking about my plight to the strangers next to me. The man next to me suggested perhaps I’d want to go as Caitlyn Jenner, and I thought that was a pretty fantastic idea.
As per usual, I overthought this a little. I asked a trans friend of mine if she thought it was disrespectful in any way to run as a trans person. (It’s not as though one’s person’s opinion dictates what an entire community would feel. But nonetheless, I felt good with her input, which is that she thought it was a loving tribute and not offensive in any way.)
I also wondered… I go as a woman every year partly because as a country, we still celebrate men more often than woman. So, is going as someone who was born a man undermining what I’m trying to do in any way?
lol’ selfie from the course
I don’t think so… Because if I think being a woman is hard in any way, I can only imagine what it’s like to be a trans woman. There is so much hate and transphobia (and bullying and such) in this world… I don’t think once being a man really gets you much once you begin transitioning.
I also wondered if I felt comfortable going as someone who is a reality show personality. I don’t have a super high opinion of reality shows. I’ve worked on a lot of them and all the manipulation we do often makes me feel bad about myself and my job when I work on them. So, they’re never something I really have a desire to celebrate…
BUT Caitlyn Jenner is famous because she was an Olympian. Yes, her family has gotten into reality TV. But I don’t want to blame her for that, or wipe away her other accomplishments. (Also, it’s 2015. Who hasn’t done something related to reality TV?)
Ultimately, not a single one of us are perfect. And she did something amazing by being herself and helping pave the way for others to be themselves as well. And that was worth celebrating.
(And practically and selfishly, it was much easier to find a white dress than a pantsuit… Plus,I’d been gaining a little weight with all the traveling and such. And there was something nicer for me to try to wear something where I could be a little curvy, hoping that detracts from the gaining weight part. It maybe makes me sound like a worse person to talk about the practical and selfish parts… But it’s real! And the race seemed to work out just fine!)
I got up early and trekked out from Newark to Macy’s Herald Square to buy a week’s worth of clothes.
(After all, all I’d brought with me (other than the interview outfit I wore) was a bookbag containing a workout outfit with torn yoga pants for the plane ride home.)
I was going to take the subway up from Macy’s, but kind of ran out of time so I got an uber. (In NY, I think the subway may actually be faster.) I changed my clothes in the back of the uber, and tried to show up like someone who semi maybe kind of half has her life together.
Every time it was mentioned that it’s my first day, people are quick to mention “What a day to come! It’s salad day!”
I think about half of these exclamations were sarcastic, as some people think salad day is perhaps a little lame. But I think some were so legitimate – because salad day is awesome! Who would be against it?
So, I was pretty super excited to start on salad day (every Tuesday). We get free lunch catered in on all of our show days (Monday – Thursday). Like, what? How amazingly cool is that?
I was a little afraid that I’d be tempted with free food, but not necessarily always be able to eat it as a vegetarian (ugh, sorry – I hate mentioning that ’cause it makes me sound all hoighty toighty or whatever in print blegh). Anyway, it’s still cool to me that they have a vegan(!) option everyday. (Yay!)
Food aside, at 12:15 there was announcement of a production meeting – and I got to go! They allow the entire staff to go to the meeting so everyone sees everybody once a day to try to keep everyone on the same page and make everyone feel like a cohesive team. It’s pretty cool!
I got to explore around and meet everybody. One of our technicians even saw me taking a selfie in the studio. She was like, “Wanna sit at the desk?” I said I heard I wasn’t supposed to walk onstage and didn’t want to get in trouble. She was like, “The only person you’d get in trouble with is me. Come on over.” She took the cover off the desk, got the guy running the lights to turn up the stage lights, and she took some great shots for me!
At the end of the interview, the line producer came in. She told me she’d email me with how much money they’d be offering.
Then it was kind of hard ’cause they were asking if I could start tomorrow, and it’s like, “Well, let’s make sure we can land on the same page money-wise. Like, heck yeah I want this job. But I need to be able to afford to live here.”
(That was my subtext. I didn’t actually say that. But we basically left it that we’d talk later in the day about money and official start date and such.)
After I left, I went up to see an apartment. (It was a total bust.)
I also called my high school theater teacher (of course), and I just thought about everything.
I had numbers in my head of kind of like, “I cannot take this job if it’s less than this,” and “I suppose I might take it if it’s this, but it wouldn’t be great.”
And then I had a number in my head that I thought was really fair (not overshooting it for me, and not low-balling it for them – just what seemed like the really fair amount). It was what I’d try to negotiate to…
And when I heard from the line producer, it was exactly what she offered me.
I know that technically you’re always supposed to ask for a little more, no matter what you’re offered. (After all, it’s your only chance to negotiate for a pretty long while.) But I was like, “Dude, they offered me what’s fair. They’re letting me leave early every Monday for BMI. It’s a job in the Jon Stewart family in NYC. Just take this job and be thankful and quiet.” And that’s exactly what I did.
I felt so wildly terrible when I called my boss in LA and was like, “I am so very sorry. I’m not coming in tomorrow or ever again.” (Eesh.) (Also, of course I didn’t actually phrase it that way.)
She is such a super nice person who’s always been wildly supportive of me. She’s given me lots of autonomy so I can still take classes and do things. She was actually the person who gave me my very first assistant editor job. She has done so much for me and my career. So it killed me to quit like that with no notice at all.
Everything just happened so much faster than I thought it would. And I really needed a job in NY. I couldn’t pass this up. (Sorry!)
I extended my hotel stay, went to Macys as I didn’t bring enough clothes to stay. And boom. I was staying in New York.
When I went into the office, I knew even harder that I really wanted this job. The head security guard greeted me so nicely. He asked if I wanted to use the bathroom. I didn’t realize, “Yeah, I think I do.” (Sometimes you gotta pee those nerves out, right?)
On my way to the bathroom, I almost ran into someone carrying a large plate of food. “I’m so sorry!” I said. That person stopped and looked at me and said, “Don’t be so sorry! It was my fault for roaming around here not paying attention.”
Everyone just seemed so super nice and sweet.
After I came back up from the bathroom, I went upstairs and interviewed. (The lead editor is the nicest person.) I tried to be honest while playing up whatever strengths I had. I did let her know I hadn’t been an assistant all alone before. Even if I’ve worked alone during my shift, there’s always been a day person I tag-team with. So, I was a little nervous to be the sole AE – excited and ready – but nervous.
Ultimately, it seemed the interview went pretty fine because in the interview she was like, “We love you. We need you to start tomorrow.” (TOMORROW)
She also said this was technically just a two-week trial. She told me it was more for me to see if I liked it here and working in a different environment (late night vs reality, and to some extent NY vs LA). I’m sure it was also for her to see if she liked me.
(But later, another editor laughed with us at lunch when she remembered my boss even telling her she wanted to make sure I wanted to stick around. Like, what? You’re worried I’m not gonna like working in NY in the Jon Stewart family? How silly!)
Even though it was a two-week trial, I just went all in. I committed to an apartment. (We’ll get to that part.) I got my stuff out of LA. I was like, “This is my job, holmes!”
I got an email back! She said she actually was looking for an assistant editor and asked if I could come in to interview.
I emailed her back right away and asked if I could come on Monday. (I had a Tuesday – Saturday work schedule in LA, not that I couldn’t have taken off work for this, but I asked if Monday was good.)
When I didn’t hear within 24 hours, I wrote again saying if it wasn’t soon enough, I’d come earlier.
I’m pretty sure I even wrote a 3rd time when I hadn’t heard by Friday – basically begging to be interviewed. (Here we go again with the line between persistence and annoying. Thankfully in this situation, it worked.)
She told me Monday was fine. And I went in Monday late afternoon.
When I got to NY that morning, I did a little apartment searching – just in case I got the job. I figured I was there, might as well look at some stuff.
I got to the neighborhood with plenty of time to spare. I didn’t want to be late. In fact, I was way too wildly early. So, I went to this Europan food/bakery place on 57th and 9th. I had the most unhealthy lunch I’ve had in a long time – pizza and a cannoli. I’m not really sure why. I thought I was being New York-y or something. Probably should’ve wanted to feel better and lighter with a clearer brain before a big interview. But you know, whatever.
I didn’t get the job. But I tried to stay in touch with the lead editor. She was the only even semi-connection I had into the Jon Stewart world. We did get along nicely in the phone interview. So, I tried.
I emailed her after the premiere episode to tell her how I enjoyed it. And I emailed her a couple of other times – maybe once every few months just to say I liked a piece or something.
She never wrote me back.
Side note: Actually, before all this happened, I have a drafted post on like “how hard is trying too hard,” and that type of thing because I’m always a little on the intense side. Sometimes it works and sometimes it turns people off… And I’m not great at just picking up on cues. (Oof.)
During this time, I just think, “Oh, she’s probably just busy.”
Of course there’s a part of me that’s like, “Oh, I’m annoying, and she doesn’t care about me.” But that part is often quiet until someone explicitly says, “You’re being too intense for me.” [*takes a minute to pause and reflect on if I’m a socially adept human being. Decides not to worry about that for now.*]
Aaaaaanyway, I was actually pretty much giving up on the idea of her wanting to talk to me anymore since I never got a response (to my very sparse emails – I am kind of normal. ;))
But I decided to try one last time – and this is where I’ll pick up next time.
I had a phone interview, which ultimately went pretty well…I just wasn’t the person for that job.
I like to believe that I can do anything all the time… So, I hate to admit that this job was a little out of the range of kind of where my skills were.
It was a junior editor job (which would’ve been the next step up for me) – but not just any junior editor job.
My understanding of most junior editor jobs I’d seen around reality TV is that you edit things (but not huge things) by yourself. Editors usually take over things you do in the last steps to smooth them out and make them better. You learn along the way from their changes until one day you become a full-fledged editor.
Sometimes you still have to do some assist tasks. But all the juniors I’ve seen have really mainly been editing – only needing to be called in to do assist duties if people are sick, or something goes wrong, etc.
I believe I could handle that sort of junior editor job. I’m not a super fast editor, but junior editors I’ve seen usually get a little extra time to do things. And I could always stay late ’til I get faster, ’cause usually the junior editor is not up against a super tight deadline (as they generally take the things that are a little lower on the priority list).
(Granted, this is all my understanding of junior editor jobs I’ve seen. You may be reading this as a junior who’s editing a ton and keeping your place afloat. And more power to you! I know every place is different.)
This job required a superstar – basically, it seemed to sort of need the queen supreme assistant editor. (There was no assistant editor slated to work on the show. So the junior would be doing any and all AE work.)
This junior editor would be in charge of creating projects, keeping them clean and organized (and figuring out that organization from the ground up, basically, since it’s a new show), doing any normal assistant editor work – and they’d also be editing.
And not just editing, but editing pieces of the show – the nightly show (where there’s a pretty big deadline and all that jazz – being that it’s gotta air *that night*)!
I’d never even been an assistant editor all by myself before. So, to be the queen supreme AE – to be in charge of all the organization elements (on a type of show I’ve never worked on) without another assist to fall back on for questions or help – and to do a good deal of editing on top of that… It would’ve been extremely tough. Not impossible, but tough.
And in a world where I have all day every day and can live at work, maybe I could’ve figured it out. But in a world where we have a nightly show happening and there are deadlines galore… it would’ve been quite rough (for me).
And with a show already just starting out, and having its own challenges with that – why hire a girl who doesn’t super know what she’s doing, as well as someone else would? (I like to believe I’m amazing. This isn’t me not leaning in, or something. This is just being realistic in where my strengths and weaknesses lie in my day job.)
So, they didn’t hire me. They hired someone who’d been an editor (and a media manager). She was willing to take the little step down from editor to junior, for such a fantastic opportunity to get on a show like this. (Now she’s a full-fledged editor on the show. (And she’s awesome.))
Welp, spoiler (as you may have seen on social media, perhaps): Yes, I’m working at The Nightly Show!
How in the world did this all happen?
Perhaps a little surprisingly, It all started about 10 months(?!) or so ago.
(What? Can you believe that?)
In Los Angeles, my friends and I (and a whole lot of other people) use this website called Staff Me Up. It’s mainly for reality gigs in LA.
Sometimes you’ll see stuff for New York. (It feels like the NY scene is continually growing on there.) Every once in a great while, you’ll see a magical unicorn – a listing for a scripted show.
Oftentimes people won’t even list what the show is. It’ll just say something like “scripted show on a major network” blah blah blah.
Last December, I saw a listing for the show that would replace Colbert. And I freaked out a little, ’cause how can that be true?! And why are they telling us? What is happening?
It’s been a dream of mine to work in the Jon Stewart family for a very long time. And it’s been my dream to live in New York City since I was a little girl. It’s the only place I’ve ever wanted to live!
I don’t remember exactly what information was given on the listing and what information I found around the internet. But somehow, somewhere along the lines, I ended up writing an email to the lead editor (and the one who was doing the interviewing/hiring).
I was basically like, “I know you might not really be thinking about me because I live in Los Angeles, but I am ready to move! It’s a dream of mine to work in Jon Stewart’s empire [etc. – basically everything you’ve already heard in this post].”
I really tried to plead my case. There was a chance she’d think I was crazy, or ignore me. But I wanted to do something!
(I’d rather take a chance and have her not like it, than have my resume thrown away and never thought of again. Whether that’s smart in general, I’m not sure. But in this case it worked out.)
…She told me my email was well-played – that she indeed wasn’t going to consider me. But basically she liked my spunk.
So, I got to have a phone interview.
As you know, since I only just moved to New York, I did not get that job 10 months ago. But we’ll get there next time.
(trying to give a little mischievous look in the speakcheesy)
Since we’re talking about comedy already, how about we talk about this comedy show I went to?
This is not in the 1,001 things to do in Los Angeles book, but I added it in my own version! I heard about this from my friend Stephen. (He lives in Spain, btw. Someone in Spain knows more cool LA spots than I do… for now. I’m learning!)
Anyway, there’s this place called the Blind Barber. It’s a “speakcheesy” (a phrase coined by one of my editor friends on my last job. It’s a secret little restaurant in the back of a basically unmarked barber shop that’s known for its grilled cheese.
(I know for “LA people,” grilled cheese can be sort of intimidating because some people are trying to eat vegan or gluten-free. Well, guess what? At the bottom the menu, the restaurant states they have a gluten-free bread option and a vegan cheese option! (What, what?) For many non-LA people, those sentences might have sounded ridiculous. But I’m just putting the info out there!)
If I was gonna go to this magical place, I figured I might as well go on the biggest night of the month.
(I couldn’t see myself when I took this photo. Not the best eating face, but I tried!)
Every month, there’s a Secret Comedy Show. (Obviously it’s not that much of a secret, but that’s what it’s called.)
It’s harder to get into than I imagined. So you’ll have to do a little planning for this one (if you wanna go). First, get on the mailing list. They’ll blast out when they open the spots for the month. I emailed right away and got in. My friend emailed I dunno, what seemed like only a day or couple of days later and didn’t get in. So, email fast!
The spots are free, and they plan for some people not to show up. So, if there’s a chance you’d use a spot, get on that list, baby!
When going to the Secret Comedy show, it doesn’t seem quite as cool as it might be to walk to the little back door in the barber shop – ’cause it’s propped open. And there’s a guy out front taking names. So this is super not secret. But other than that, it has a very speakeasy-type vibe. There’s a lot of candlelight and even some mirror balls on the ceiling.
The show started a little late (’cause it’s LA). But that was cool anyway, ’cause it gave us a chance to get to know our neighbor seatmates a little better. (There was only room left in the back sharing a booth with these guys.)
It was weird to sit in the back. There was a big pole in my way. So I just had to kind of listen to the comedy without watching someone, which felt weird. (Where do I put my eyes?!) But I did get to kind of people watch, which was fun.
(My view from the booth in the back.)
The grilled cheese is indeed quite good. The sandwiches are big and filling! My recommendation is to get different kinds and share with the people around you.
I sort of regret eating my entire sandwich (well, half of mine and half of my friends – so my whole new one) because I was so full!
So, go hungry. (Go really hungry, ’cause they have dessert grilled cheese too – which we had no room for, but you could!)
The people running the show were really into it being very quiet in the restaurant. Even the bartender would put his hands in the back room when he had a drink he had to shake (so as to try to do it as quietly as possible). They wanted all the attention on the comedians.
I haven’t been to a ton of stand-up shows. I’m not sure that that’s usually how it is. I’ve been to the Comedy Store a couple of times and I feel like I always hear some people chatting in the back. But I don’t really know what stand-up show etiquette is. Maybe that’s how it always is.
Anyway, it was a good night! (In case you’re wondering, I got the #9 – the grilled cheese with pickles. Mmmmm, pickles. One of my favorite foods!)
(trying to look cool looking out over the city… Not totally sure why there are white specs all over the photo :-P)
After narrowly escaping the Detective room (in one of the most fun things I’ve found to do in Los Angeles), I was so amped up I felt like doing something else.
I stopped at home and checked my books of things to do in Los Angeles. I saw that there’s supposed to be some cool rotating bar, overlooking downtown, called Bonaventure. So, I headed that way.
I walked in to the Westin – which is super swanky and really beautiful.
When I lived in Boston, I lived close to a couple of nice hotels. Sometimes I’d go sit in the lobbies to work on my computer. Visiting this place made me want to do that here. That Westin is nice!
There was a sign that said the Bonaventure closed at 10 and that the elevator to get to the 35th floor wouldn’t even work after 10pm.
(trying to give a little face with downtown behind me)
It was after 11 when I went there, but just in case multiple signs were wrong, I pressed the up button anyway. Turns out, the signs were wrong.
The elevator did work. And the place was still open ’til midnight. (I guess these were the secret hours!)
Taking the elevator up is super cool because you pop out of the hotel, going along the outside.
As you’re going up, you see the shimmering pool beneath you getting farther away. And you see all the lights of downtown all around you. I love the exterior elevators!
There weren’t a ton of people in Bonaventure. I met a group of cousins at a table.
I asked if we were moving after all, ’cause it didn’t super feel like we were moving. (And supposedly, according to signs, the place was supposed to be shut down at 10 anyway; so who knows? Maybe they turned off whatever makes it rotate.)
One of the guys said he didn’t think we were moving. Another one said they were absolutely moving, as his view had changed throughout the night. And one wasn’t sure.
As we talked, we picked a point to watch to see if we were indeed moving, and we absolutely were.
This is a cool little bar/restaurant. And I’d definitely recommend hanging out there if you want a chill semi-swanky place to eat or drink and enjoy the downtown view.
We talked a little until the lights came up at midnight. They went off to Pink’s. And on my way home, I stopped off at The Standard… which I’ll talk about tomorrow.
Welp. This is anti-climactic, huh? And so not the way I thought it was going to “end.” I put end in quotes because this isn’t over until I only have one kidney… But this UCLA chapter is done.
I was told I’d get a call from Dr. R. I never did.
I did check in with my donor coordinator about 3 weeks later, asking if Dr. R. ever did plan to call (or if he didn’t need to since I already heard about the rejection).
She wrote back saying the decision was not going to be overturned and the transplant committee would no longer be involved in my care.
I feel like I was a little passive aggressive in my email back, saying I was surprised that there’s no amount of months/years/tests that could turn things around. But if that’s the verdict, I guess I have to accept it.
(Blegh. I feel bad about kind of coming across as a jerk.
…Still, though. No plan to turn things around? Nothing I can go? Gah!)
So, that’s it. UCLA has put their foot down on a strong no…
I’m not going to jump back into this at another hospital, though it is something I want to do. Truthfully, since the very beginning I wanted to go through Massachusetts General. Boston is sort of like home to me – and that hospital feels especially like home since I spent so much time there. I got the greatest care I could’ve asked for.
I called Mass Gen at the very beginning, before I even went to the Ohio hospital. But I was fatter then. Also, Mass Gen wanted me to be a little older. Those seemed to be the main issues in the way when I talked on the phone to their donation department. Well, I’m less fat now. And years have passed (almost 3 years!). So, I’m a little older too. Maybe I’ll call them again soon…
I do not want to get rejected again. I do not want to go through another long multi-part series that ends with nothing. This is way too much work and too much heartache to accomplish nothing in the end. So, I might wait a tad bit longer, lose even a little more weight and just make sure I’m really, really ready.
In general, in life, I don’t believe in waiting for stuff. And I do kind of think you should do a lot of things before you think you’re ready. (‘Cause when are we ever ready?) But for something I’ve tried and tried… it’s time to get this right.
I will probably call them in a few months and let you know what they say. If not them, there are plenty of hospitals all around the country – and whatever happens with whatever hospital – I’ll tell you all about it right here.
I’d made the awesome (read: awful) decision to go get drunk, ’cause obviously that’s gonna solve all my problems.
Spoiler alert: It didn’t solve my problems! Who’da thunk it?
I woke up the next morning with a headache and skin that felt so dry, a brain that felt so drained. All of it felt pretty terrible. My workouts were torture. I was slower and things were harder. Aye aye aye aye aye.
How do some people do this every weekend?
I guess this makes me sound kinda lame, like “Oh, Aurora can’t handle her liquor” or whatever it is people say when they make fun of you for having a hangover.
Well, Aurora can’t handle her liquor! I rarely every drink. And it’s not a skill I care to cultivate.
As far as the actual night of drunken-ness, drinking seemed to make the people around me very happy. So people were having fun, which is nice. But it didn’t make me feel any better or free-er or happier or any of that…
My friend did say “Drunk Aurora is loud but so fun.” When I told that to a friend of mine, he said, “so exactly like non-drunk Aurora then?”
Precisely! If drunk Aurora is the same as non-drunk Aurora then what is the point, people? What is the point?!
So, anyway, I wasted a night (and really the next recovery day). (What a waste.)
I was hoping they’d have photographers on the Golden Gate Bridge. This was obviously the moment of the race and everybody looked so silly taking selfies of it (though I’ll admit after telling myself I wasn’t gonna do it, I did it at the end of the bridge).
But yeah, I hoped for a nice wide shot with the bridge in the background.
So, I was super happy to see photographers practically lining the bridge. There were so many, I knew there had to be at least one good shot of me on the bridge.
After the race though, the one disappointing thing was that none of my shots from the bridge have the bridge in the background. You can’t really tell where I am at all. But oh well. You win some, you lose some. I remember it well, and I suppose that’s all that matters.
I did have the best time on the Golden Gate Bridge. It was so beautiful. It was the perfect amount of San Francisco fog to not be overpowering, but to just have a really pretty misty overlay. Also, I felt so strong! There was something serene yet powerful about it all at once. And as my various jams blasted in my headphones, I felt super empowered!
I hadn’t been feeling super empowered lately, kind of just stressed and blah blah blah. So, I wanted to run it all out in this race!
Even with stopping for a couple of pictures (even turning around to grab one of a sign I liked and almost missed), and simply walking up hills, I still beat my best half marathon time. So, when I was running, I must’ve for real been running. Boom! (Just running life out, baby!)
I felt super empowered in the moment on the bridge with my workout playlist lifting me up!
Once we were done with the bridge, I’m pretty sure about 10 miles were done. What? Only a 5k left? Let’s get this!
Once I got into the park, I knew I was going to beat my old time, but not by a ton. So, I just kept steadily jogging it out, so excited to finally see that finish line!
As I finished, I put on the theme song from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, just trying to remember that I’m unbreakable! I say all the time you are who you decide to be. So even if I falter and have rough patches here or there where I embarrass myself or things don’t go perfectly, if I decide to be a strong, awesome, kind, caring woman, then I will be. After all, “females are strong as hell!”
As I ran in, my friend Michael was waiting for me and waved happily from the side of the finish line!
He greeted me after the race. I got my special “half it all” medal for finishing both half marathons in two consecutive years. Then we went back to my friend Jaime’s apartment and she made us loads of pancakes!
I’ll be back next year for the full marathon! (And my awesome 52.4 sweatshirt that you get when you do the two halves and the full). And my friend Jaime will be running the gorgeous, spectacular first half!
I’ve been up to San Fran a few times (for the races and also to visit one of my best friends in the world). The last time I went up for 10 days, I tried to explore a whole bunch. And I kinda actually knew what was going on around me.
I looked to the left and saw, “Oh, that’s Coit Tower!” And when we were coming up on the Presidio, I felt familiar with that. When people were cheering outside of Sports Basement, I remembered having shopped there.
I just feel like I have a generally better sense of the layout of San Francisco than I even do my own town.
I don’t know if that’s because I’m more adventurous in SF than LA, or if it’s because it’s more exciting to be out of town and that helps memory, or if it’s because SF is small and surrounded by water. So it’s not a hard to know what goes around the edges of a circular thing as opposed to some amorphous shape (like LA).
Anyway, it’s not really important. But it’s just weird ’cause I am so horrendous with landmarks and directions that to think “I’ve been on this trail” or “I know the general way to get to the Golden Gate Bridge from here…” It just feels like “Whoa, what?! My hypothalamus is actually working?” Crazy.
Although I will say, the Golden Gate Bridge did keep feeling like it was supposed to be closer. Yeah, I get this water is pretty and fun and stuff, but… Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?
Eventually, we did indeed get there.
I called my dad while on the bridge, ’cause I saw that I was going faster than expected. It was so funny ’cause I opened panting while running with “Daddy, I don’t have time to really talk, but are you by a computer?” And he leapt into action. He sounded so intense when he said, “Yes I am!”
I told him I needed to know my time from the New Year’s Run, ’cause judging by how things were going, I think I could beat it.
He looked it up and texted me the time (2:54:18.8). I knew I had to beat it. And when I heard my running app hit an hour and a half at 7 miles in, I felt strong!
Even after a bunch of nervous nervousness, I successfully got to the start line – which was so well ran – super organized with 10 minutes between each corral.
(Also, they had inspirational messages cycling on a big screen such as something along the lines of, “You made it to the start. The hardest part’s over.”)
The waterfront, of course, was beautiful. It was nice to start there this year (instead of getting on a bus to the park for the 2nd half).
In the first mile, I overheard these guys talking about running all night and realized I was in the presence of one of the amazing ultramarathoners!
(There’s an option at this race to start at midnight at the finish line of the marathon, run to the start, then turn around and run with everybody else! How amazing is that?)
I ended up talking to a few ultramarathoners along the way. Before I talked to any actual humans doing it, and it was just kind of this idea out in the world, it seemed like this superhuman thing. But then when you talk to these people doing it, they normalize it so much.
When you read about it, it says there’s a time cutoff of 5 hours for the first marathon. That’s the part that scares me. I can’t even do one 5-hour marathon! But as the first half of an ultra? Eeesh.
Well, I came to learn that really you just have to finish the whole thing by the time the marathon’s done. And if that means the first part takes you 6 hours, that’s okay.
I also didn’t realize how hard it is to run that first marathon because apparently you’re following a map(!) and things aren’t all marked out as well as they are during the actual marathon. In my head, I figured you’re on the course you just follow it. But it sounds like it’s kind of easy to get lost… I get lost all the time everywhere (sometimes even when there is a course!). So that’s something to be aware of when I do the ultra!
Also, it was funny to hear about the difference in spectators – the drunk people cheering along at 2am vs the early risers out at 5am.
But enough about stories from the ultramarathoners (since after all, I’ll have my own when I do it :-)…But I do love having a general sense of some things ahead of time!).
Back to the race – I ran along the waterfront and it is crazy to me how semi-well I know San Francisco.
Easily one of the very best (of the 67) half marathons I’ve done.
This race was phenomenal, exceptional, just all around lovely!
I was a little nervous going in. As has been established on this blog, I’m a slow half marathoner! The time limit for this half is 3 hours (as opposed to the super safe 3 1/2 of the other half). Also, I’ve done the San Fran 2nd half twice now and each time I’ve commented how tough it is (with the hills), and some stranger always says, “If you think that’s tough, try the first half!”
So, I’d been scared of the first half… And that was silly. Because the first half was gorgeous, empowering, doable, fabulous – just a whole bunch of great adjectives!
All the little before-race details were also making me nervous… My sleep schedule was off. (I didn’t sleep at all Friday night, ’cause I went straight from my night job to the airport to seeing my friend and picking up my packet.)
Then I also wasn’t even sure what time to eat or how much to eat. Usually, I have that part pretty under control. Not this time.
I went to bed pretty freaking early Saturday (after not sleeping Friday). And then I woke up in the middle of the night… And ate more. I thought I overdid it with the calories (and I still think I did by a little), but it didn’t hinder me too much.
I also worried too much about what to wear! I brought a couple of options with me because I wasn’t sure what to expect from San Francisco. I knew that in the past years that I’ve done the second half, people are always huddling by heaters in the park – 3 hours after the 1st half started (by the waterfront!). So, I was worried about it being cold.
When I woke up, I felt the windows and checked my phone for the weather and I still wasn’t sure if I’d rather wear my light breeze shirt (which I wore with a jacket) or my warmer Under Armor shirt. The only thing I sort of regret was bringing a jacket, because it came off pretty quickly in the race (within the first mile or two) and was just something extra I didn’t need to be carrying around.
(However, had I not brought a jacket and been freezing, I would’ve regretted that more, I think.)
So, that covers all the nervous energy stuff – even though it was all silly because this was the best race, which I’ll get into next time.
My friend kind of tried to piece me back together (or at least get me normal enough to be presentable to go eat at Buffalo Wild Wings). (I love that place.)
He was one of the people who didn’t actually want me giving a kidney. So it was this very weird kind of non-comforting comforting.
‘Cause he was actually relieved, since he was in the small camp of friends who (despite statistics) believed kidney donation was dangerous and was trying to convince me not to do it.
So his comforting was more like [*said in a sarcastic way*] “oh noooo. You don’t get to give one of your vital organs! Whatever will you do?” It was sort of funny and kind of made me laugh a tiny bit. And I know he was trying to be funny and adorable. But it was still just a rough morning ’cause it’s like, “Yeah I get the humor. I appreciate you being there for me and giving me a hug right now. But goodness am I disappointed. That’s not totally going away.”
I felt bad ’cause I felt kind of distracted during lunch. I was totally off my game, missing answers in trivia I absolutely knew, consarn it!
My friend told me to come out drinking that night. He thought that might help, to have a night of just carefree hanging out with people mixed with some alcohol.
Now, in general, I don’t drink. I’ve read both of Madonna’s dermatologist’s books cover to cover. So I know the big secret to staying young is to not drink.
I usually try to deal with my stress by running. But I was feeling all weird and jumbled inside and thought maybe I’d go out on the town that night and see if alcohol could erase my problems for a night (sounds like a suuuuper healthy thought process, huh?).
I went to work after our late lunch (as I work nights). He texts me on my way home telling me to come out. I’m kind of hemming and hawing about it. “I don’t know. Is this gonna be fun or annoying? Are we all gonna be fun, or just sad/mean/angry drunks?”
Well, he’s already drinking and seems to be having a bunch of fun as he’s texting me. And when I get home I just feel so sad, and just kind of lonely sitting in my apartment alone. I contemplate going on the treadmill. But I’m like, “Eh, this is a devastating failure – bigger than the ones I usually run out. I’ve been invited to drink and my friend seems to be having a grand time out. So let’s just freaking try it.”
So, I called to find out the results. The receptionist said she’d look into it and get back to me. She called me later in the day and told me the fabulous news. My protein is within the normal range! What up now?!
I was so excited, and kind of in a bit of disbelief. I emailed my donor coordinator like a kid at Christmas. “What comes next? Let’s do this thing!”
She wrote back and told me she’d take my file to the kidney committee.
What? Already? Seriously? I thought I’d have to take the test at least once more, if not twice more. How is this happening? But if she thinks the file is ready to go to committee, I guess let’s go there!
After all, the test was turned in May 1st. And everything had to be done by August in order to give my kidney without having to re-take everything (since my big kidney days happened in August of last year).
(If you’ve gotten lost in the story at all, part of all the time it took was getting an appointment with a primary care doctor and blah blah blah. But can you believe nearly a year went by?)
I waited with bated breath as each looong day went by until the 22nd. I didn’t think they’d necessarily say, “let’s do it!” But I did think they’d at least say, “We’ll do it with two more good tests” (or something like that.
But no. I got an email that afternoon from my donor coordinator saying I’d receive a call from the doctor.
Since I remembered how long it took him to call me last time (with his completely justifiably busy schedule), I asked if she could at least tell me the outcome (especially since we were going into a holiday weekend).
She wrote back saying the “decision is NOT reversed.” (She’s the one who put not in all caps, not me.) There was something about that all caps part that stung.
If this test wasn’t gonna be good enough, why did my file even go back to committee (without anyone asking me to get more tests first)? Why did I get my hopes up (even a little)?
This sucks. This really sucks.
I thought I was ready for the rejection, since of course part of me thought it would happen. But there was that pesky relentlessly optimistic side who thought, “Time has passed! They’re the ones who said my file should go to committee without asking for anymore tests firsts. They’re gonna say yes – or at the worst yes with conditions.”
But relentless optimistic me was obviously wrong.
And I started sobbing in front of my friend who I happened to be with (getting ready to go to lunch) when I got the email on my phone. (We were in his apartment, not public yet, when the sobbing happened – in case that makes it less weird in your mind… or maybe more weird. Who knows. All I know is I needed to cry!)
I happened to find out about this when my friend Angela and I went to see the Gamble House. I love when little adventures to lead more little adventures!
My favorite museum I saw on this day was the Los Angeles Police Museum. They had a whole exhibit about Patty Hearst. You could sit inside the closet she had to live in, to get a teensy feel of what it must’ve been like for her to have to try to sleep and function in there. (It was cramped.)
I loved in general how interactive the museum was! I got to get a little fake mugshot taken, go in a cell, pose on the motorcycle. The docents were cool and knowledgeable and told me all about the first police woman in the LAPD (who was also the first in the nation!).
(We had to wear little footies at the Gamble House. You couldn’t go in, in real shoes.)
The other big standout was that Gamble House is the exterior of Doc Brown’s house in Back to the Future. I’ve never seen Back to the Future, but I did take a picture in front of the house.
As far as strategy for the day, I went with what I thought would be my favorite museum first, and just kinda went in order that way. Then, I get to spend the most time doing the stuff I really want to do.
It seemed pretty hard to hit all 6 in a day. You could do it, if you go right when the museums open and keep a pretty good pace. But, I’d probably aim for 4. (But do your thing! And if you give Museum of the Arroyo day a try, I’d love to know how many you hit, and your favorite parts!)
As far as the race itself, it was quite an interesting little run. Part of the reason it was so cheap was because they didn’t close down roads. (I think the initial intersection was shut down just for the start of the race.)
There weren’t a lot of arrows or directional signs. There were small mile markers… But you had to know where you were going to get to them.
Thankfully, there were maps at the table and I actually took one! (Usually I just let the race signs carry me, but even at the beginning of the day we all knew that seemingly nobody knew what was up. So I took a nap to be safe.)
I used a bit of creative license with this race. I went back to the grove after the first 10k (’cause there was a 10k and a half option). I wanted to make sure I got back before Lance Bass left.
(And I knew I was gonna be slow and that non of it would matter that much if I had to double back on parts or go back out since we weren’t timed and no streets were re-opening or closing. We basically were on our own little personal runs that other people happened to be sort of around for.)
So anyway, I stopped in after the first 10k. I went back to the area where we’d picked up our packets in the middle of The Grove. I looked around for a finish line celebration, but there was none to be found.
I asked “where’s the finish line for the race?” Nobody seemed to totally know, and eventually I found it was just a stack of balloons at the entrance to The Grove.
No fanfare. No Lance Bass. Nobody. (Well, okay, there were some nice runners who took a picture of me.)
Even though I wasn’t on a totally real course, and I wasn’t being timed, and there was no medal I needed to justify, I still went out and did the remainder of the half because I said I was gonna do a half that day, so I did.
I took a detour on Larchmont Street, ’cause I knew I had nothing to get back for, and it seemed like a happening place. I had no idea there was this cute little street in Hollywood with all these little eateries (and what seemed like 40 million cupcake shops).
I totally got some food. After two weeks of no working out, and with the sun beating down on me, this half was tough! I ate way too much. I went super slow. But at least I did indeed finish 13.1 miles… even though I didn’t meet Lance Bass (which was the whole point!).
So, I shake my head in super shame. The next time I see Lance Bass around (especially if it’s a public event), I’m not gonna worry so much and I’m just gonna try to get a picture!
I didn’t see him until it was basically time to start the race. It was as though he just appeared on a little stage by the start line. (It was barely raised above us. So I tooootally could’ve gone over and asked for a hug or something.)
But I’m an idiot.
Security was around him. No one seemed to be trying to talk to him (which really surprised me, but I was like “um, is that the fool respectful thing to do right now – leave him alone? He’s here at a public function. Isn’t this the kind of place I could ask him for a picture? Why is no one fan girling? :-p)
My best guess was since the race was starting soon, no one wanted to bother him in crunch time (and neither did I).
I almost just hung back and waited for all the runners to start. Then I would try to meet Lance and start late.
But I didn’t see anyone else who looked like they were doing that.
And I didn’t want Lance to be like “what are you doing? Get out there!”
Of course, he seems like a nice enough guy. So I don’t know why in the world I was worried about that.
Also, this fell on the weekend I was allowed to work out again after 9 days of basically no activity (for this kidney test I was taking).
I knew I was gonna be slow and struggle. Usually I’d be all “I can start late and run to catch up.” And today I was thinking, “I need to start with everyone and work my butt of just to keep up.”
So I ran right by him – right by him(!) as I started. I was so close to him, I could hear him saying thanks to the person next to him… But I didn’t stop to ask for a picture!!!
Next year I want to go, but I probably don’t want to run it.
How many times on this very blog do I need to learn that when you have an opportunity to do something, you jump on it (before that lesson is engrained and never messed up again!)?
Far and away the main reason I wanted to run this race is because Lance Bass was the host. Lance. Bass. (I am a humongous *Nsync fan!)
I figured if I ran it, I could probably meet him. Well, here’s the thing. I made the assumption that as the host, he’d stick around and be there when people came in.
I envisioned it like the Rock ‘n’ Roll half marathons – where Annie sends everybody off and she’s there to high-five you when you come back, keeping the energy up at the finish line the whole time.
Well, I was sorely mistaken.
Another lesson in life – you never make assumptions! I have heard that a million times. But part of the problem is that sometimes I’m making an assumption when I don’t realize I am. I thought I just knew how half marathon hosting worked. I didn’t realize it fell into the assumption category until I saw he wasn’t there at the finish…
It was free to register for this race if you did it far enough in advance. I didn’t. So, I had to pay $10. However, when I got there, as far as I could tell, the people behind the table weren’t checking any papers or collecting any money for late registrations. You just went up there signed a waiver and got a shirt and bib.
There were no timing chips, so that’s why no one at the desk needed to be concerned with whether anything matched up.
(Also, even though I saw I could’ve totally gotten in without paying $10 online, if I’d just showed up that morning, I was fine to do it ’cause the money went to The Trevor Project.)
After I got my bib and t-shirt (which I’m amazed we got either for free or practically for free, since the stuff was nice), I went searching for Lance Bass.
(The Magic Castle!) Gah! This has been on a list of things I wanted to do for a long time! Though I never even knew how to go about doing it.
I figured one of these days someone I knew would know somebody, or somehow I’d get in to the special invite-only fabulous castle.
And sure enough, I get a call out of the blue from this incredible guy, an editor I worked with about a year ago! Of course I was happy to hear from a super fun adventurous person I’d sadly started to lost touch with (it seemed).
He said he has a membership to The Magic Castle(!), and he remembered I’d said I’d always wanted to go. So he wondered if I’d like to go with him.
Would I?!
We weren’t allowed to take any pictures inside. So I can’t really show you anything. But I can tell you about it!
When you first go in, you enter by looking an owl in the eye and saying the secret magic words to make a bookcase move to the side. (What? Amazing, right?)
In one of the rooms, there’s a ghost piano player. (It looks like a self-playing piano, but it says there’s a ghost playing it.) If you lean in like you’re talking to her and request a song, she will switch and start playing that song! It’s insanely cool.
There’s a schedule of shows, and we went to a couple. The magicians seem to like bringing up people who are at the castle for the first time. (I got to be a part of a trick in two different shows!)
In between shows you could go to a number of different bars. They all seemed to be themed after one thing or another. That was one of the most awesome things about the castle – everything was ridiculously well-themed. I love when places pay attention to all the little details – in the molding, in the carpet, everywhere.
Alex and I shared some delicious fries (bad for you, but tasty… and I did The Grove Half Marathon the next day… (as if that’s an awesome defense, but uh, whatever. The fries were delicious and I enjoyed them! :-)).
Later we got to see the main show in the big room which had a ton of funny moments, not just magic ones.
It was a night chock fill of gasps and smiles. I loved it there! I’m so glad I finally got to go, and would happily go again anytime!
Working out was surprisingly(?) tiring that day. I guess it shouldn’t have been all that surprising. When you laze around as much as possible for a week and a half, that’s more than a rest day or two to rebuild! That’s like freaking muscles ready to atrophy.
So, I had a little workout, which was nice. But then I had a semi-full weekend planned. I didn’t want to give up any of the fun stuff happening… even though I did kind of want to just go live in the gym (as painful as that now was – amazing how quickly the body adapts).
As far as my fun stuff went, I went to a show on Friday and had a sleepover with friends that night. We slept way in until it was time to go home and get ready for the Magic Castle(!) on Saturday. Finally, when Sunday rolled around, it was time to get back in the game with a half marathon!
It was not a pretty half marathon. Thankfully it was not timed, because I was slooow. I somehow made it through, but it was slow. And I stopped for food. Twice.
I was a mess. But at least I did it. I started working out a lot more, which of course made me happier. I will unfortunately say that the bad eating (already in 9 days!) became a habit that was a little tough to break. I still went back to a lot of good foods and vegetables. Yet, I had more sugar than I used to… I kept craving it. So, dealing with really re-setting on the food was more of an issue than I thought it would be.
Thank goodness that the weekend was full of fun activities because it helped distract me from waiting for days for the results to come back.
I knew if the results were good, they’d just be mailed to me. But come on! I can’t wait for the mail!
So, I called the doctor’s office on Monday.
Hmmm I sound annoying and a wee on the persistent side a little too often in this story, don’t I? …This is an Aurora thing for sure. It is the thing that gets me jobs, opportunities, friends, people to love me lol. It is also my undoing and the thing that probably loses me jobs and gets me people put off by me sometimes…
It’s the only way I know how to be. And it certainly is a way to make sure things get done (since the main person looking out for you is you!)… But uh, there’s a line on what’s persistent and helpful vs what’s annoying. And I am not always perfect at seeing that line.
But anyway, the people in the doctor’s office didn’t seem to mind (as far as I know). And this is where I’ll pick up next time.
I was talking about character work. I went up to be someone who was a birdwatcher who needed shoes, and who wanted to spend time with the birds – in the trees, in the sky, wherever they may be.
My biggest issue my teachers brought up in my Groundlings classes was that I basically always played either a super positive young girl, or an embarrassed young girl. And that’s pretty much all you got from me. And the idea was like, “Yeah. You could play that in a commercial or a show. But this is improv. You can be literally anything! Be an old woman. Be a hoity-toity person. Be a shy person. Be anything other than a wide-eyed excitable girl who stepped out of a musical.
And what was my birdwatcher? …An excited young woman.
I think that’s my go-to when I get nervous. ‘Cause that’s just me… But that’s not acting, consarn it!
A birdwatcher could’ve been a sort of gruffy outdoory person. Or it could’ve been a quiet contemplative person who likes animals more than people. It could’ve been an uptight-ish bookworm who’s super interested in and knowledgeable about the world around her. I could’ve been so many things and I just went up there basically as me.
Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye.
But we all made it through, and people still clapped ’cause of how exciting it was that the shopkeeper figured out the thing.
Everybody lived.
I did feel slightly out of place because it seemed to be a crowd of people really in the iO scene. It seemed like everybody knew BJ but me. And he seemed like a super cool guy, so I wish I knew him!
It was really nice to see someone who loved improv so much! You could tell in his eyes when he was introducing different games and such that he just loved it. And the people around seemed to love him. It was very sweet.
At the end of the night after everyone hung around the bar in the lobby for a while, I told him, “Hey, I don’t know you, but I had an awesome time tonight and you’re really funny.” He gave me a huge hug, and it was awesome.
This night really made me want to do more at iO West. I really like the scene there.
This is another one of my 52 performances in 52 weeks!
I don’t know why I keep insisting on doing improv in my life when it’s so stressful!
…And when I always seem to get it wrong.
And yet, there’s something about that stressful feeling that I really enjoy, and there’s some belief I just can’t let go of that I’m gonna keep getting better. And eventually people will laugh so much and think I’m the bees’ knees. So… I keep going back to it.
I didn’t have anything planned for this Sunday night. One of my go-to things when I don’t have plans has become to check out iO West’s schedule (’cause it seems like there’s always something cool and funny going on).
I saw that an improver they love was saying goodbye, as he was going to serve in the military for a while. They said the show would end with an improv jam, and that everybody should wear red while and blue. So, I threw on my red and blue sweater dress and headed down there.
The show was funny and then the jam started. BJ said up to 6 people could come up for the next game. I was one of them. It was a game I’d never heard of before. Thankfully (or maybe not thankfully, depending how you look at it), the stage was sort of crowded ’cause so many people had been in the show.
That meant I could easily not play the game without it being noticed that I went up there but didn’t play.
And that’s exactly what I did.
The reason I say maybe that wasn’t a good thing is because perhaps it would’ve been better for me to force myself to play a game I didn’t totally understand and definitely didn’t have the hang of. After all, the point of improv is to jump in!
After that game was over, BJ invited people to stay up if they wanted. So, I stuck around for the next one where there’s a shopkeeper (who goes in the hall while the audience decides what the shopkeeper’s selling). When they get onstage, the other improvisers come in and shop, giving clues.
Our shopkeeper was selling sandals, made of licorice, that gave you the ability to fly. She had the sandals made of licorice part. So, I jumped up to give the last clue. She did get it after mine, so that was awesome.
BUT I did really terrible character work. (Oof.) And this is where we’ll pick up next time.
The power of Twitter comes through again! Goodness I love that wonderful tool!
So one of my followers is a JPL scientist and invited me to take a tour of the place. (What?! :-))
So, I don’t want to try to talk too too science-y, ’cause I don’t wanna come off as the idiot who went to JPL for a day and now pretends like she totally gets all that awesome scientist stuff.
(Not to undercut myself too much. I mean, I like to think I’m pretty smart. But I went to high school for musical theater and didn’t finish college (which was a music conservatory anyway). So, um, what do I know about science? Not enough!
But there were definitely things I didn’t think about that needed to be taken into account when building things and being scientists and jazz.
Did you know that they have different models of the Mars Rover to simulate different things? Gravity is different on Mars than on Earth, so they have a weight-adjusted lighter robot to help simulate how it will actually move along the ground.
just hanging in the Mars Yard
Makes total sense after hearing it, but not something I would’ve thought about before.
Basically, I got taken around to all the super cool spots – the Mars Yard, the big control center, the place where I could see what was being built for the future. It was pretty darn dope.
Did you also know JPL has an artist-in-residence?! That’s right, even one of the most science-y of all science places recognizes the awesome value of art! There’s a light structure/installation thing that shows when we’re receiving information from Mars and when we’re emitting it. It’s really beautiful watching the lights pass in different directions.
It was an awesomely fun fascinating day, and I’m kind of ready to become an astronaut now.
Thank you to the awesome people at the Sunset Strip Half who let me do this race for free!
I was volunteering at the LA Marathon expo this year, and during my dinner break I walked around to the different booths to see what was going on.
I talked to the Sunset Half people about how cool their race seemed (especially when they showed off their super awesome, amazing medal at the booth), and how much I wanted to do it.
We talked about my blog (and I was kinda fishing for a free race… I never know how to go about that stuff, but I know I love running for free!).
We talked about some of my projects and one of the guys in charge checked out my Instagram. Then he wrote some kind of special code on top of a registration form and handed it to me, giving me a free race!
So far, I’ve gotten a whole bunch of cool things through Twitter… But this is is the first one mainly due to Instagram! (Thanks Instagram!)
I spent the majority of the day before this race on a bus heading home from my amazing trip to San Fran.
I totally ate my favorite pre-race meal (chips and salsa) while on the bus! (I can barely smell anything, though I am aware that I think sometimes salsa has a strong smell… Hopefully I didn’t annoy any fellow bus passengers with my mini-feast!)
As soon as I got home, I tried to hit the blankets. This race started a little later than some – awesome for getting extra sleep, not awesome for how hot it got… But there was some shade. It was all good.
I loved the signs along the course that gave you little tidbits about places you were running around.
One of the signs with a fact about Tupac’s last performance
It also was somewhat interesting to me to run around West Hollywood, ’cause I’m terrible at knowing where things are in relation to other things.
I have gone to WeHo a lot for various workout classes, dinners with friends, jobs, (even to get dolled up for The Emmys!) and so forth. So to see everything. And how it fit together was interesting to me. (Though let’s get real, I could not draw a map of any of it right now if you asked me to.)
(For real, though, what is wrong with my hippocampus?)
Aaaaanyway, I wasn’t too terribly concerned about my time on this race. I didn’t start an app or anything to keep track.
I was taking it easy after a wonderful active vacation full of hiking and workouts, and I still did the half in under 3 hours and 6 minutes – which was closing in on my best time from 2012 (the year of 52 half marathons in 52 weeks) (that I huffed and puffed and struggled for).
Now my PR is under 3 hours. But when you look at what I used to struggle to do vs. what I do on a lovely 13-mile jog, it’s really nice to see that running’s getting easier (or better or something good). (Yay!)
There was a little stretch where I was running down the street without anyone around me, and it wasn’t too bright out where I was, and I just remembered, “Goodness I love running. It feels so good!” (I should keep doing more of these half marathons, huh?)
After the race, we got Gatorade in a can (which I didn’t know was a thing)! And we got the super cool medal. Then I walked on over to Bar Method, and did another workout!
For 24 hours starting Thursday morning (and going into Friday morning), I peed in the same container. I followed the instructions to the letter! No more getting caught out and peeing in cups.
I didn’t just keep the container in a cool place, I put it in the refrigerator (which was listed as a recommendation, so I’m not just some weirdo putting pee in her fridge).
I was all about doing everything as perfect as I could.
I wanted to keep my hopes high, but I still wasn’t too sure it was going to work. Not to give you tmi or anything, if you don’t want to hear about my pee maybe don’t keep reading.
But anyway, if you have too much protein in your pee, part of it will look a little bubbly/fizzy-ish.
The bubbles can also mean other things – like maybe you’re dehydrated (which I was! Because my understanding was that you do a little better on the test if you don’t drink as much (and don’t pee as much)).
I think they can mean some other things (including maybe there just being leftover cleaner in your toilet!).
So, there’s not a humongous cause for alarm just by seeing bubbles. But still, I saw them. And in my freaked over over-sugar, under-healthed state, I thought [*as dramatically as you can read it*], “This better not be a sign that I still have too much protein! I swear I will throw this container of pee across the room!”
I calmed down a little and thought, I’m dehydrated. Let’s hope it’s that. Let’s just hope it’s that.
I also thought that if I was doing all this and still had too much protein, then at least we’d officially know I wasn’t taking the test incorrectly. After all, maybe there really could be something wrong with my kidneys. (Obviously let’s hope not.) But no matter what, the test will tell us something. So, at least there’s that.
I was so happy going to bed on Thursday night. Once I woke up Friday I put my final pee in the container (yay!), and then I ate a delicious protein-ful vegan meal from my freezer. Ah, protein! Precious protein. Yum!
I jumped on a bus and headed to UCLA to turn in the test. Immediately I hopped over to Native Foods Cafe and loaded up on some of my favorite meals for the next couple of days. Yum, yum, yum. So content. So happy.
My friend Michael was waiting for me on the other side!
He drove me around a bit. (I saw the old mediation center where he used to reside. (I say reside instead of live ’cause there is some specific criteria I guess for actually living there. I dunno, but I don’t he didn’t technically live there… even though he kinda lived there… whatever that means.)
Then we went up to Mt. Tamalpais. I was so slow. After my many workout classes and lots of walking around SF, my body was a little done. So the steep incline was tough. But Michael let me be slow.
The view was pretty, and it’s always nice to catch up with your friend (especially when he’s your super interesting hiking-everywhere always-doing-something-new-and-different friend).
There was a rest spot partway through with a 3D map of the place, which made the hike you were doing look even cooler.
Once we got to the top, we enjoyed the beauty. He was able to really just take it in. And I was the lame tourist-y person saying, “Let’s take a million pictures!” …And we did!
He showed pointed out all the different parts of the Bay Area for me. It was amazing how good he was with landmarks and knowing where we were from way on top of a mountain.
It’s lovely seeing cities from so high up. And the fog made it even cooler, like you could really tell we were in San Francisco (since fog is such an SF thing… though I guess it’s a thing of other places too).
In Michael’s perfect day (and probably usually mine too), I think we would’ve hiked all the way from Mt. Tam to Muir Woods. Unfortunately, we got a bit of a late start (’cause I wanted to say goodbye to other friends in the morning… also, I hate getting up early (sorry!)). And with my super tired body, it was nicer to do two shorter hikes anyway.
So, we drove down to Muir Woods and it was gorgeous. We just walked around, I don’t know how far. Not far, like a mile or two? We saw some gorgeous redwoods and lots of interesting tourists along the way.
After dinner, Michael drove me back to where I was staying through a very foggy Golden Gate Bridge (which looked cool, even if slightly scary).
I guess it was sort of hard to put into words in this post, since I’m not even totally sure what I said except, “Yeah, we went hiking and it was pretty.” Oh, well, how original! But it was just a really lovely day. [*content sigh*]
Circling around to finishing my San Francisco trip –
On my last full day of this trip [*super sad pouty lip face*] (Friday, April 17th), I took the ferry over so I could go hiking with a friend of mine from high school!
We’d been talking about hanging out practically the whole time I was there, and we finally made it happen at the end.
Michael is super active. He puts me to shame. I was super nervous about going hiking with him (and definitely slowed him down), but I had a really fun time nonetheless (and think/hope he did too).
First, I rode the ferry over to Sausalito.
When I was walking into the ferry building, this girl (of probably high school or college age (not that that matters at all, but just to help you picture it)) was walking out with flowers. She made eye contact with me, handed me the flowers and said, “Have a wonderful day!”
What is San Francisco?!
Every interaction I remember having, with anyone there, was full of kindness! It’s great to know how beautiful, wonderful, kind, precious, fabulous, and on and on the city and the people are. ‘Cause SF is not that far away. If I ever need a little reset (which is kind of expected, living in LA), this seems to be a lovely place to go!
So, I went in the ferry building and walked all around (since multiple people told me I had to check it out). I’m glad I went from end to end, because I found Peeples Donuts! I try not to go too crazy on vegan desserts. But I felt like getting a donut, and I did! They. were. amazing.
I’ve had some vegan donuts before, but never thought, “Oh yeah, this is just as good as the non-vegan one.” But these seemed even better than non-vegan donuts! (And of course the people working there, just like everyone I met everywhere, was so super nice.)
I rode the ferry over to Sausalito, talking to an interesting couple from Indiana most of the way. I had no idea how much work was involved in being a minister. It’s not just church services. It’s funerals, weddings, and such. It also sounds like you’re the head of your church in every way (building maintenance, etc.). Apparently you’re busy all the time.
Side note: this was around the time the “Religious Freedom” bill (signed by Governor Pence), in Indiana, was all over national news (re: what it meant for companies being able to discriminate against gay couples/having protections when refusing to give services to same-sex weddings). So, part of me was a little hesitant to talk to a pastor from Indiana.
(Of course, it’s silly to be hesitant to talk to anyone. How can you find common ground and work forward on issues in America if you only talk to the people who agree with you 100%?) Turns out, he was open-minded and not against same-sex weddings. So, high-five to him!
Not only did we enjoy nice conversation, but also nice views of the gorgeous Bay Area all the way to the other side of San Fran. And this is where I’ll pick up next time.
Speaking of planning things (such as proposals or any special day, such as your birthday), thank goodness everything went according to plan with my balloon ride.
I was warned on the phone that sometimes rides are cancelled or moved due to weather (and even had to give a backup date possibility).
But I figured, “Ha! Southern California? How often could that possibly happen?”
Well, apparently more often that you’d think! We heard from the pilot (and later from reviews, which I can’t believe I didn’t read first) that they don’t fly if it’s questionable in the slightest. Any fog, any strong winds, any anything and they ground the balloons. Whoa. No one on my balloon had been rescheduled and the pilot seemed quite surprised.
So, thank goodness for that! But uh, I guess that’s something to keep in mind if you’re coming from out of town and hoping to go ballooning.
As the sun started to come up more and the ride started to come to an end, it was becoming harder to maneuver the direction of the balloon. It seems like the hotter it gets, the harder it is. (Hot air rises faster than cool air, but when the air around you is hot, you’re in more of a battle with it). Yeah, science!
(Or at least sort of science-ish. I obviously don’t have a wild understanding of hot air balloons, air molecules, or any of that – but I do feel like I know more than before I went!).
Chris (the pilot) had warned us that we probably wouldn’t land in the same place (we didn’t). But he said “you’ll like it better that way, ’cause you’ll get to ride the party bus back.”
I thought he was joking, referring to a normal shuttle as the party bus. But no. Legitimately, after we landed, a bus with a stripped pole picked us up. At 7:50am.
(from my snapchat)
(I put it on my snapchat story with just the time and no caption. Just like “Yep. This makes sense.”)
The party bus dropped us off back where we started.
I started drifting off a little while in the car, but thankfully since Alex was driving, it didn’t matter!
We also plugged in my phone and fed it through the stereo (mainly so we could hear the directions), but we also put on all Michael Jackson all the way home (since my birthday shares the same day as the anniversary of his death). His songs are produced/engineered/performed so perfectly! I mean, really. Wow.
Anyway, I got home, hit the pillow and slept for a couple of hours. Then I grabbed my free workout from Sweat Garage (thanks!) and went to work. Another birthday and new experience in the books!
One thing I didn’t know about hot air ballooning is that you can skydive from one!
I’ve never been skydiving, but I’ve heard it’s a stressful experience – that it’s loud and the plane feels rickety and fast and that it’s just kind of stressful. And I’m sure there’s something exciting to that – getting your adrenaline pumping the whole time.
But I also think it might be so cool and fun (and a great dichotomy) to have this nice super peaceful ride up, just to jump out of a basket.
For our ride, we went up about 3,000 feet. But hot air balloons can go much higher. I think our pilot was talking about 14,000 feet (for skydiving purposes)! There is a threshold where the balloon is only allowed to go so high if there’s oxygen for all passengers on board. So, hot air balloons have lots of possibility.
Another thing I learned, not on the actual day, but by watching a video from another Sunrise Balloons ride (the company we went with), is that proposing to someone on a hot air balloon is a terrible idea (in my opinion – unless you want your proposal to be hilarious)!
Because the basket is split up into compartments, the guy didn’t even have enough room to get down on one knee. He was awkwardly trying to position his body. I felt so bad for him. So he gave up on that and gave his little speech. He’s doing the whole ramp up of “all this time with you has been amazing, etc.” and when he gets to the actual, “Will you marry me?” WHOOSH! You hear the loud sound the burner makes when the balloon has to adjust.
It just seemed so awkward and sad but soooo funny. I couldn’t tell if the girl was in shock or was more just like “who thought this would be a good idea?” But she definitely wasn’t coming off as all that into it… Though she eventually said yes (even though it seemed reluctant). Of course, I don’t know the ins and outs of their relationship. There’s way more involved in the decision to get married than the balloon ride. But I would so not recommend it, ’cause in practice, it seems to be way less romantic than one might imagine!
Everyone goes over there and we all start climbing in the balloon. The hot air balloon is divided into 5 compartments. There’s the big one in the middle for the pilot and then two on each side of him. They put up to three people in a compartment, so get prepared to get a little cozy (though we all still had space – it was all good).
We climb into the balloon using little footholds. I don’t know what I expected, a door or something? But nope. There was climbing. (I love climbing. So it was fine by me!)
As we all were standing there, a couple of people were getting a little nervous. (There was a woman on our balloon facing a fear of heights.)
Climbing in!
Heck, even I got a tiny bit nervous for a moment. We’re all just standing there in a basket getting ready to go up in the sky! I had that kind of hold-my-breath feeling like I was ready to take off on an amusement park ride or something.
It wasn’t anything like that. We floated up off the ground so very, very slowly. Our pilot tried to keep our speeds to just a few miles an hour and below. He was saying 7 miles an hour would be quit fast for a hot air balloon. So, the point is it’s slooooow.
It’s beautiful, and fun, and cool and awesome. And super slow.
So then we just kind of float around and up and down for, I think, over an hour.
The pilot cracks some jokes and talks to us about flying. (Did you know hot air balloon pilots get licensed through the FAA? It makes sense hearing it now, but it was just something I didn’t really think about.)
My understanding of how the balloon works is that hot air weighs less than cooler air. So, he pilot fires up the propane burners when it’s time to rise. He can also pull a little flap thing to let some of the hot air out if he needs to go down more.
He was telling us how you can’t totally steer the balloon. You can try to understand the direction of the wind at different elevations and use your height to help you get blown to where you need to go… But you don’t really steer.
In fact, when we landed, he threw ropes down to crew members who pulled us along until we were in an open area to land.
Now let’s talk about the food I ate – the terrible way in which I tortured my body.
For the first few days I continued to count my calories – just eating mainly foods that are not my main staples… and staying away from everything that was.
Did you know that in some of my vegan microwavable meals, there are 11 grams of protein for only 300 or so calories?! That seemed like too many for what I was going for. So those were out.
Even just packets of vegetables. I was practically yelling in the store as I’d pick up mushrooms and read how many billions of grams of protein were in them. “Gah! Forget you, mushrooms!” (I mean, not really, ’cause I love you. But aaaaargh my favorite foods are making me upset during this time.)
As time went on, I got hungry. So hungry. And I was so tired (from all the not working out and my lack of protein). So… what to do when I’m hungry and tired and cranky?
I know. How about I stuff my face with sugar! Sounds like a great idea, don’t you think?
Did you know frosting is vegan and has 0 grams of protein? Oh yeah. That’s right. I most definitely did eat an entire tub of frosting. It wasn’t all in one sitting. And at first, it actually kind of hurt to eat. But a couple of days later, when I got to the bottom of the tub, I was licking out the last bits of it.
What am I doing to myself here?! My skin is breaking out. I’m feeling bloated and gross.
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. Everything hurts.
That’s when I went back and read my entry about hearing the news that I was denied as a kidney donor, and how sad it made me. I thought about how much I wanted to do this for someone else. So, I suppose this sacrifice was worth it.
And yes, I will totally admit a couple of things:
1) I’m sure I went overboard. Did I really have to try for 9 days? Did I really have to eat sooo little protein? No. I didn’t. But after the last test, I was so very nervous. And I just wanted to be so sure.
2) There have to be ways to eat a low protein diet better than just eating a can of frosting. So, I was being a little dumb and a little ridiculous. I will grant you those things without argument.
As my 9 or so days went by, every morning I’d say, “Only x days to Thursday.” And finally, eventually, somehow Thursday came. It seemed nearly impossible, but alas, it happened!
It wasn’t long before we saw other cars park and heard people getting out. As the sun began to show, we followed people into the little room where everyone was meeting.
There was light breakfast stuff – donuts and cinnamon cake. I partook in some of the sugar, not ’cause I especially wanted some, but ’cause you know, I was sleepy.
Our host started pouring mimosas.
By the way, I didn’t realize “hot air balloon host” was a job, but it is. She confirms your reservation a day or two before you go. She gives you food and drink, tells you which balloon you’re in – and then points you to the correct balloon and tells you when to go there. She also takes a bunch of pictures.
So, yeah, writing it out, of course it makes sense there’d be a host, not just a pilot. But when I first got the text “this is your hot air balloon host,” I thought “huh. Didn’t know that was a thing.”
It was funny how much people were invited to drink (at 5 in the morning!). Bottomless mimosas were flowing in the room where we waited. Then there were multiple bottles of champagne flowing once we were in the basket. The pilot just kept asking if people wanted more. (And then there was a party bus coming back, but we’ll get to that.)
We all begin to make our way outside from the breakfast room and look on as the hot air balloons get set up. Trucks drive these huge tarp-ish-looking things out into the field. The baskets come out and get set up sideways (so they can blow propane, or whatever it is they blow, into the balloons to help blow them up.
We start to see the balloons get more and more full, and then we’re invited to walk through rows of the vineyard to get to the field and get closer to our balloons.
(I have some cool video, but am having a hard time uploading it here… grrr…)
Once we get down to our balloons, we can see in more detail the baskets on their sides with a strap with which to pull them up. Once the balloons are almost fully inflated, someone grabs the strap and pulls the basket right-side-up, as the pilot climbs in and the balloon becomes fully formed straight up in the air.
At that point, Chris, our pilot says, “If you’re with me, come on in!” So, everyone in our balloon goes on over there.
I choose hot air ballooning kind of on a whim a couple of weeks before my birthday.
The guy on the phone from the adventure place I googled was so nice. And I just thought, “Yep. Okay, this is the thing.”
[Note, though: Obviously I should’ve checked out a couple of places, and I should’ve checked groupon. I’m usually really good about that kind of stuff. But I think I was just distracted by a lot going on at work or blah blah blah excuses. So I found a place, liked the place, and landed on it. (And I guess there is something to be said for that too – just finding something good and going with it when it’s not a life-altering decision. Anyway, moving on….]
I hosted a facial party at my apartment a week or two before my birthday (to help out a friend of mine who’s trying to sell skincare products). When we were talking about what I was gonna do for my birthday and I said hot air ballooning, one of my good friends said, “I’ve always wanted to do that!” So I said, “come with me!” He said, “but wait, is this really a for real invitation? Because I will!” And I’m all, “of course!!!” (Not that you need the little play-by-plays, but you just got ’em.)
So he called the place and signed up with me. This is one way you know that someone is really your friend. He picked me up from work (I work nights now) at 2:30am! That’s right. At 2:30 in the morning, he picked me up so we could go down to Temecula for a sunrise balloon ride.
The car ride was super fun, because for one thing Alex is super fun, adventurous, and interesting. And for another, I learned that we have so much in common! So often something that one of us said was met by the other one with a “ME TOO!”
(right after the morning road trip)
For instance, we both adore Olive Garden (even though soooo many people think it’s “too fast food chain-y” or whatever :-p) So, I felt like I really found a long-lost friend or something when he said he loved Olive Garden.
We got down to Temecula early since there wasn’t any traffic at that time of morning. There didn’t seem to be much to do (as far as we could tell) at 4 something in the morning. So we parked in the parking lot of the winery where we were going, leaned our seats back, and looked out at the stars through his sunroof (moonroof, since it’s nighttime?)
I was like “I’m gonna take a picture of us to help document the day.” In the first picture, my head looked huge (partially because I have a huge head). Then he said, “Well, I’ll lean forward so mine will look bigger, making yours look smaller.”
Can you even believe the kind of amazing friendship he showed in that moment? Sacrificing the good angle so the birthday girl can have a normal-sized-looking head? That is kindness right there!
Recently, I’ve been enjoying class pass – this awesome, unlimited workout thing. I am totally obsessed with it and absolutely going to write about it in the blog.
And now that I’m in the system of all these various workout places, free birthday stuff has been raining on me!
Not only that, but places I’ve volunteered in the last year and a half have sent me cards. And restaurants have sent me free coupons. I know every year I do something I’ve never done before for my birthday. But goodness! I think I could have a field day just going around and using all these free coupons and free classes!
Here are the conclusions I’ve come to about all the free birthday stuff rolling in:
1) I know it’s a silly thing for me to care so much. But my feelings for a place get so much warmer when they give me an adorable (and/or super cool) thing for my birthday.
For instance, I got a coupon for a free scoop of ice cream from Ben and Jerry’s. I know I want to be healthy and I’m trying to eat more vegan than not. But, well, I love Ben and Jerry’s. And the coupon that comes to my inbox is so colorful, friendly, and fun. I just adore it!
I love Ben and Jerry’s! (I’m in the truck.)
Plus, Ben and Jerry’s totally wins because they give you something special for your half birthday too. And they’re awesome on twitter. So for all those reasons, Ben and Jerry’s totally has part of my heart no matter how healthy I try to be! (Hey, they’re coming out with vegan flavors! As they’d say on Parks and Rec, treat yo’ self. ;))
2) Competition is fierce! At Cyclepathic (which I already loved and adored), they sent me an offer for a free day of working out – that’s right. A full DAY of unlimited classes! AND a free towel with their logo.
I’ve already planned a hot air ballooning adventure for the morning, and I have to work at night. So, it’s super sad I won’t be able to fit them into my birthday schedule. But I will definitely remember how much I appreciate their super cool birthday generosity when looking for workout classes in the future.
Some places give you more of a buffer, like you can have a free class anytime your birthday week. That’s pretty cool too. (I personally don’t mind it being relegated to the day, but I guess it’s nice to have a buffer. If I wasn’t already on class pass, imagine the number of classes I could try to schedule this week!)
Another workout pic from Cyclepathic
Shout out to Sweat Garage for a free class and towel rental. xoxo (There’s one right before I have to go into work, so I will totally be there.
But then I’ve been getting these emails with like 5% off, or no deal and just a “hope you had a great day!” That’s better than nothing, but I’m so spoiled from all the super generous places. Time to step up your game, [unnamed companies]!
3) There’s just something about feeling appreciated. Even the places I volunteered that sent me a card – on the one hand, you could make a case that non-profit money is being wasted on cards. On the other, it’s like I put in time and effort and it really means something to me that these places said, “You care about us. We care about you.” And it makes me all that much more likely to go back. So, I think it’s money well spent.
Ultimately, I think what I’ve learned is that whether I have a big business someday, or even if I’m just me, I’d be a lot cooler if I really worked harder to make people feel special on their birthday and all year long. I generally try, but I can be a whole lot better! I need to step it up to Ben and Jerry’s/Cyclepathic/Sweat Garage level, baby!
(Before the climb up – it’s the building up there)
I tried some new workouts while I was in San Francisco and by far my favorite was TRX. If I lived there, I’m pretty sure I’d practically want to live at that studio. I felt so strong when I left!
On this day (Wednesday the 15th), I got a day pass and wanted to see how many classes I could hit.
Let’s get real. I’m never getting up early enough to be at any before noon. So, that was the first one I went to. Then I had a few hours to kill before they started up again for the after-work crowd. (I went to 3 more that night.)
Anyway, my 3 hours to kill. I walked over to Levi’s Plaza so I could walk the steps up to Coit Tower. Along the way, I met someone named Abhijeet, who became my fun walking buddy. He told me about living in San Francisco as we walked up the steps.
Once we got there, we parted ways so he could read his book in a beautiful scenery, and I could keep well… just wandering. I went to the gift shop and finally bought a mug! (I love mugs!)
Abhijeet and I randomly met up again as we entered the line at the same time to go up to the top! It was his turn first and when he was asked, “Two tickets?” At first he said, “just one.” Then he looked back at me and said, “Make it two.”
with my new friends in the tower
The level of kindness I experienced in San Francisco is incredible!
We went to the top and the woman who was working there was from France! She was so interesting telling us about the world, and about living in San Francisco now. She even sang for us! Her name is Virgine, and we still text every once in a while.
After I took in some beautiful views all around San Francisco, I headed back down and to my last 3 workout classes of the day.
At the TRX Training Center, I got my butt kicked in the most wonderful way. I talked for a long time after the last class with this super inspiring instructor, Miguel. His positive life outlook is so contagious! If you are in SF, I would highly (highly!) recommend going. And if you’re not, you can still follow him on instagram.
Those 9 days were… painful doesn’t even seem like the right word. They were so frustrating, tiring… I don’t even know!
I’d just come back from San Fran where I went out of my way to be super active. I was feeling so great about myself! And then I became this couch potato (wah wah).
As each day went by, I got a little crankier to the people around me. I was getting so exhausted! No only did I not have working out (which helps keep my energy up), I also wasn’t even fueling myself properly. So I was feeling gross.
For the first few days I kept it together. I was all, “I’m gonna keep a great attitude about this! I’m gonna try to do a bunch of cool (or at least productive) non-workout stuff this week.”
Nope. I was cranky an insufferable within a couple of days.
I did still do some productive non-workout stuff. Even when I was getting my hair dyed (and all prepped fr my headshots), when my stylist asked me to sit up a bit in the washing bin chair thing, the way I sat up she said, “I see you’re still trying to sneak in a little ab work, huh?”
I’m not trying to say that I’m super fit or anything. I’m just saying, it can be a bit hard sometimes to get in the groove of exercising. So once you’re there, you wanna keep doing it! (Or at least I do.) Also, your body gets used to working and pumping out all those beautiful endorphins. So when I made it go a bit haywire, it’s like it was screaming at me, “Aurora. What are you doing?!”
The habits I’ve worked so hard to get into (such as always taking the stairs), I know undid them all. I felt so silly just standing on the escalator as it took me up in the subway station. I also felt that people around me might be judging me (which I know is sooo silly because people are wrapped up in their own lives. What do they care if I’m on the stairs or escalator?).
So, I’d have to talk down my brain all the time. “There are plenty of reasons you could be on the escalator. You could be injured. People probably just think you’re injured. No one’s judging you for not being active enough, or for using the moving stairs that are zapping needless electricity (since there are already elevators for anyone who does need assistance). Oh my goodness, calm down, Aurora! Eesh.
And I’ll pick up with how the eating went next time!
Another fun highlight of the trip was the day where I took a hike!
I helped out with my friends’ daughter in the morning. (Yeah, yeah, I know, the word “daughter.” Weird how some of us have kids now. Let’s just keep going…)
Anyway, I was helping in the morning, so I didn’t get to Lands End until the afternoon. I figured I’d do a short little hike before the sun went down. What I didn’t realize was – it’s all a short little hike!
huh… Mexico only 775 miles away… A Little tempting.
San Francisco seems to big (to me, at least) on maps. But then when you start walking around, you start realizing everything is practically right next to everything else. I stopped into the Lands End visitor center (because I love being a tourist – asking questions, getting advice, and meeting people). (Plus I love mugs from gift shops! (Even though I didn’t buy any here.)…
While in the visitor center, I was asking to where I should hike. They were telling me about some places only a couple of miles away. Then someone mentioned, “You could go to the Golden Gate Bridge, but it’s kinda far.” Well, it looked kind of far on the map, but when we started talking about it, I’m pretty sure it was only a bit over 2 miles.
(How is everything so close to everything else?)
This was a candid shot while I figured out how to pose with the sign, and for some reason, I liked it a lot and here it is!
So, I headed off, saw some scenery, made it to a beach, ate a delicious kind bar, and then got to the Golden Gate Bridge.
One thing that was funny to me was that I’d always seen these pictures of the Golden Gate Bridge from the side looking so majestic and such. It never really dawned on me that it’s a normal bridge that people drive across with tolls and such. It looks so normal from the front.
(Speaking of the toll, apparently you don’t even pay right there. What I heard is that a picture is taken of your license plate and you get billed later. Is that true? Also, how is that possibly more efficient than people paying right there? …I guess it’s too time consuming to have people stop on the bridge? I dunno.)
I didn’t go across the bridge because I’ll be doing that in the upcoming San Francisco half marathon. But I totally poked around the gift shop. (I love mugs! Though yet again, I didn’t buy one because I haven’t yet gone across the bridge and back.)
Made it to the bridge!
I also stopped in at the little food store (which has marked up, pricey snacks, in case you’re wondering). So, pack up, friends!
I then kept on going back through the awesome Presido (where I found a super cool sporting store that was holding a triathlon club meeting with a bunch of super nice people!), ’til I hit the Palace of Fine Arts (which was beautiful. I’d love to see something there). And then I walked on home to my friend’s apartment. Another gorgeous rejuvenating day complete in San Fran!
Finally! Now that we’re beginning to get a bit caught up on the blog, I can talk about some things I didn’t get to mention over the past couple of months.
First up, my trip to San Fran! I don’t know where to start or how to break up these posts. So, I’m gonna do it the best I can.
I felt like I needed a break from LA. I love and adore my friend Jaime in SF. We’d been texting a bunch about how we both really wanted to see each other. So finally I said, “Okay, how about I take the bus up.”
She was so sweet! “Uh, yeah. Obviously. Come here now.”
So, um, I basically did.
Everyday while Jaime and her husband were at work, I tried to find new, exciting things to do.
On one of my first days there, I went to a workout class, BodyRok. The studio was close enough to the hairpin turns on Lombard Street that I figured Lombard Street would be my touristy thing for the day.
I only knew about Lombard Street because this car racing show I worked on had a whole SF episode, and they loved talking about Lombard Street. I wanted to see if it lived up to the hype.
On my way to Lombard Street, I went the wrong way. (When do I ever not get lost?) But in getting lost, I found Presido, which I didn’t even know existed!
I started walking around confused and in awe. It looks like a gigantic and pristine college campus. But a lot of the people there did not look like they were in college. And some of the buildings seemed to serve other purposes.
I didn’t recognize the word “Presido” when I saw the signs. I hadn’t heard of a school or business with that name. So… where am I? Am I allowed to be here? I’m gonna walk around until I find out what this is and/or someone says get out.
I met some people walking and said, “I know this is a weird question. But can you tell me where I am?”
At the bottom of Lombard Street
Turns out, it’s a big area of a national park. You can read more here if you’re interested.
The guys also said that George Lucas owns (or maybe rents?) a bunch of buildings on the property. People work there. (And they seem to have a grand ol’ time.)
I walked around The Presidio more another day (which we’ll get to), but suffice it to say, it was huge – huge!
You could spend at least a full day (if not multiple days) and tons of money just hanging in The Presidio. There are spas, restaurants, bowling, golf, and on and on and on… I don’t even know what all they have there. I just know it’s a ton. (Mental note to explore that area more sometime! …Or, I guess actual, physical note, since I am writing it.)
I did eventually make it to Lombard Street. It was indeed pretty cool. It seemed like probably a nightmare for people who lived on the street since cars seem to be bottlenecked there as apparently drivers want to check it out just as much as walkers. It was amazing how many tourists were out taking pictures… and I was one of them!
I ended up not having to go in after all. Once my appointment got closer, I asked one more time if he could order the test without seeing me again (so nobody’d have to waste time on an in-and-out appointment).
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’m selfish to ask again. I know. But it worked!
(But now there’s probably a note in my chart about how annoying I am, huh? Oof. Oh well. Let’s not think about that…)
So he ordered the test. This time I was determined – determined(!) – to get it right. I stopped working out 9 days(!) prior and watched my protein like a hawk.
It’s a good thing I did it for 9 days, because honestly the first couple were kind of a mess. Basically, what I really wanted was a full week of low protein and no working out. So, having the bumpy days (of wanting to work out just a liiiiiittle, or of making protein mistakes) helped.
I didn’t realize there is protein in basically everything! I made a rule for myself that I couldn’t have any of my precious Kind bars because they’re nuts. And I knew I should probably stay away from delicious protein-ful nuts.
I happened to have frozen waffles in the back of the freezer. I try to eat healthier than that generally. So I thought, “Okay. A carb. This’ll be good.” Well, when I looked at the package, a serving size (2 waffles) has 5 grams of protein already! There are only 6 grams of protein in my precious Kind bar!
Aye, aye, aye.
So, I started counting protein grams closer. Toward the beginning of my 9 days, I went to Universal Studios and had a delicious veggie burger. It didn’t dawn on my until I was practically done, “Uh, yeah, veggie patties have loads of protein!” Eeesh.
Speaking of going to Universal Studios, it was practically painful going there without being allowed to work out. To me, part of the most fun of going to Uni Studios is how much working out you do to get there – how many steps there are in the subway station, that big hill you walk up to get to the park. Even once you’re in the park, you need to walk down tons of steps to get to The Mummy Ride.
I love the active theme park! But on that day, it was all about shuttles and escalators and all that jazz. It was still fun, of course. (Super fun!… But still not quite as fun ;).)
As I wait for my appointment, I try not to think about kidneys too often. Every once in a while, something will come up that reminds me. But for now, as all I can do is wait. I’ll just let it chill on the back-burner…
Well, I’ll try to.
In the couple of days that followed my initial talk with Dr. R, I did a little of that online “research” that so many of us love to do. “But what could my proteinuria mean?!”
It’s listed as one of the signs of kidney disease. Know what else is? My super dry hands. And it’s like, “Oop. Yep. There it is. I must have kidney disease.”
Of course, I don’t really believe I actually have kidney disease. But you know how that rabbit hole goes.
So I wait and wait and wait for what seems like forever, until the day finally comes.
And nothing earth shattering happens.
I meet my new doctor. He’s nice. He runs some labs and refers me back to Dr. R.
It’s ridiculously hard to get an appointment with Dr. R.
While I’m waiting to get one, my labs come back. The initial small pee-in-a-cup test came back with a normal level of protein.
I don’t remember what it was about the week before the test – if I was abnormally busy (even though I hate that word), or if I was sick or what, but I remember I wasn’t super active.
So, I thought maybe it truly was a matter of not working out so much! I asked if I could have a 24-hour urine test one last time to see if I could do it right. The person on the phone said I’d have to get an appointment to ask that question. I tried to push it (in the nicest tone I could). “Do I really have to have an appointment? It’s literally one question – and one we sort of touched on while I was there.”
But alas, I couldn’t convince the person at the desk to ask my new doctor. (I do respect that doctors have limited amounts of time. So, I’m not necessarily saying I was in the right. Obviously I was just thinking about what’s easiest/fastest for me.)
I took the next available appointment – which was in April.
Oh, it’s time to start talking about this new project! I’m so excited!
Some people have asked me what kind of parameters am I going to put on this. What constitutes a performance?
If I have a reading of some of my material in the apartment living room for a handful of friends, is that a performance? If I play the same character (in the same show) two nights in a row, does that count as two different ones? What if I only perform for camera without a live audience?
There are lots of questions, and I’m sure many people have their own opinions. But here’s where I land with it… I’m just going to use my best judgement.
Some things will be obvious and clear cut. Others, not so much. But I’m just gonna do my best to use my best judgement.
I know that’s not super constrain-y sounding. But these are projects I make up! I’m excited to just be open to the experience and see what lies ahead.
As I did with the volunteer activities (and even half marathons), I’m going to try to vary things up. I hope to do things for small audiences and large. I hope to do some comedy, drama, singing, dancing, plus some stuff I’ve never done before (like being a mime or a human statue). I’m just open and excited and we’ll see where it goes.
If you have ideas or suggestions about anything, I’d always love to hear them!
One of my helpful bunkmates suggested I go to the handicapped accessible shower because it had something you could sit on!
(Don’t worry. In the middle of the night, I wasn’t in the way of any people in need of that particular shower.) Thank goodness for the seasoned veterans who have little helpful tidbits like that.
So, that was lovely. After I showered, got dressed, and came back to the room, my bunkmates laughed at me a little for having picked a top bunk, and now needing to get in as I was waddling around with all my blisters. But alas, I successfully climbed up there.
Thankfully, the nightstand was high up by the top bunk. So I could still reach all my stuff. I had a bunch of bandaids. After my shower, it was much easier to see blister damage and bandage up a few more things.
I also ate in the middle of the night (since it seemed like I almost could not get enough food).
In the morning, I headed back out to the finish to see how things were going. (And they were continuing to be very generous with food since they were going to have a lot left over). So, I ate some more. (It’s crazy to me that I ate and ate and ate and ate, and yet when I weighed myself a few days after getting home, I’d lost weight. Bodies, huh?)
I didn’t really want the weekend to end. But everything’s gotta end sometime, huh? So, eventually I sauntered out. I had the car until Monday morning. So I took my sweet time going home. I found a discounted movie theater. So I watched Big Hero 6, ’cause why not? (It was touching, I thought.)
Then I walked around that mall for a while, making sure to use my legs a little. Then I popped on some Sam Smith (that I bought after hearing him a ton on the radio in the car), and walked around the nice neighborhood/smaller strip-mall-type area across from the mall.
I finally got back in the car, but heading home still seemed kinda lame. So I took a detour through downtown Disney (’cause why not stop by The Happiest Place on Earth?) I grabbed one of those big special Disney caramel apples. (Yet more food?!) (I only could handle eating half of it, but that half was quite delicious!)
Finally, I returned the car. I cleared out all my bags and rode the rental shuttle back to LAX (and got the shuttle home from there). The rental car shuttle driver said the thing that impressed her most wasn’t the 50 miles – it was that I was carrying all my bags after the 50 miles! I thought that was funny. Getting home was the part I was most worried about – being super tired or fatigued, having a tough time making the trip.
But I indeed got home safely (and randomly passed a John Stamos project filming a block away from me super late at night on the way home).
First 50-miler in the books. I’m already ready to try it again (or 100!).
I think another part of the reason it maybe felt like I was kinda supposed to keep going was because it was a loop – a 2-mile loop I’d done 25 times. I was in the freaking groove. “Oh I stop now?”
I loved it being a loop, by the way. Some people thought it would get boring. But I loved never being more than two miles away from an aid station (and bathroom etc.). I also loved sort of turning my brain off and knowing what was in store for me in each loop.
But yeah. I sort of feel like in my quest to pace myself and not hurt myself that I maybe didn’t pace hard enough. I didn’t end feeling a huge need to sit down. I ended with more in the tank. And I don’t think you really want to end your distance races like that…
So, yeah. There was just something off about the first 50-miler…
As I mentioned earlier, there was something off about my first marathon as well – which was also a trail run. So, maybe it’s just something about those.
I don’t know. I guess before I come to any real conclusions, it’ll be a matter of doing some more 50 or 100 milers so I have something to compare them to.
Once I got to the finish line, I was invited back in the aid tent to have my blisters tended to. I grabbed some foot to eat while it was happening.
When I took of my shoes, I had no idea how gross the aftermath was going to look! I’ll spare you the pictures (and too many graphic details), but suffice it to say, it was a total mess. Oof.Dave patched me up as best could be done with the mess of blisters on top of other blisters going on. Even though my cabin was only a mere short distance away from the finish, Stephanie (one of the races co-directors) drove me over there! She even literally gave me the sandals off her feet so I didn’t have to stuff my swollen shoes back into my sneakers.She told me that she loved seeing me go by each time – that I always looked happy, and that I seemed to be keeping a pretty even pace. I’d been nick-named the smiling peanut butter jelly girl (’cause that was what I always grabbed as I ran by).
Once I got back to the cabin, I took a wonderful long shower. And this is where I’ll pick up next time.
As I was getting closer to the finish, I wasn’t thinking about how excited I was. I was more thinking about logistics. Okay, what comes first? Do I rip these shoes off? Do I eat?
There was like a list in my head of stuff I thought needed to happen, and when I came into the finish it wasn’t so much a celebration so much as, “okay. Get the medal. Get a photo. Grab some chips to put some fuel in your body. Ask Dave to help you take care of your blisters.”
And that’s what I did.
When I finished my first half marathon, it was a big deal to me. I was on top of the world. And when I finished the Goofy Challenge, it felt even better (though granted, when I finished my first full marathon, I don’t think I was quite ecstatic). When I finished my first 50k, I felt even better than at the Walt Disney World Marathon.
So, part of the reason I did this 50-mile race is because I thought that every time my distance increased, I felt better! I wondered “what could a 50-mile race possibly feel like?” But then when I actually got to the finish, I didn’t feel a huge sense of relief or elation wash over me. And I can’t totally pinpoint why!
I don’t know if it’s because there were only 3 people at the finish instead of hundreds… My best hypothesis is this:
Running is my therapy. It’s my stress relief, my meditation, whatever you want to call it. And often when I’m running a race, I’m working something out. For instance, I trained for my first half marathon because I’d quit a job and I thought it might’ve been the dumbest career move of my life (and it might’ve been… but you never know).
I didn’t know what to do with that pent-up stress/energy! So, I trained for a race. And I ran it, and everything seemed so much better. (In fact, everything seemed so beautiful during the training of that! I was living in New York, working at Macy’s Herald Square. It was such a precious time I value… Moving on.)
During the LA Marathon, I was peeved at a good friend of mine (’cause even good friends are never perfect… as none of us are). And I ran out my little peeved-ness. During the Goofy Challenge, I wasn’t upset about anything, but I was running out the end of this big project. It was this huge culmination of something.
And here, the questions were more open-ended. “Where do I want to be? How do I want to get there?” So, nothing felt resolved at the end…
It kind of felt like, “Uh, is this really the end? Should I keep running?
I’d paced pretty well the whole time – always leaving myself a buffer for when I slowed down.
I started to feel some blisters sometime I think close-ish to mile 40. But I just let them go. I didn’t want to stop. And they didn’t feel so bad.
But as time when on, my feet hurt more. (The closer I got to the end, the less I wanted to stop to investigate and “waste” time!)
In my third to last lap, I was taking teeny tiny steps, and I went way slower than I thought I would. With the 15 hour mark potentially coming up too quickly, I jogged the last 4 miles.
There were these two guys – Rocky and Ray – I’d seen at dinner, breakfast, and even chatted up a few times on the course. I’d told them I wanted to finish in under 15 and they saw me in my last lap, doing it up! That was nice that I got to share that with someone.
I jogged on in, listening to songs I loved to keep me going. In the last mile, I rocked out to the theme song from The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (as that’s new on my playlist and so inspiring!).
I was soooo happy when I came in and saw the clock just under 14:50!
But when I finished, it felt weird… And this is where I’ll pick up next time.
In mid November, I officially got the packet in the mail with the denial letter. UCLA also sent me my chart (without me even asking), which I thought was nice of them.
I wrote my donor coordinator asking if she’d heard anything from Dr. R.
At some point, I’d followed up with an email, asking what we should do next (since Dr. R had mentioned I’d need follow-ups and a nephrologist and such). But I didn’t hear back.
I’m assuming it was just because he got busy helping all these people who were actually dying from kidney failure, as opposed to the girl who’s worried her protein is somewhat too high. Or maybe my email just got lost in the shuffle or the bowels of the internet or wherever.
Whatever ended up happening to it, I didn’t want to be too bothersome. So, after I got my rejection letter, I followed up with my donor coordinator, asking if she knew what I should do next.
I had to talk to her anyway because somehow I’d received a bill for one of the kidney tests, which she said she’d make sure was rerouted/taken care of… Obviously any further testing is paid out of my insurance, since I’m not currently a candidate. But any previous testing is paid for by the kidney acquisition fund.
I’d also noticed there weren’t any notes from the psychologist or social worker in my chart. So, I asked about that too. My donor coordinator said they don’t give out anything pertaining to those visits. I thought that was a little odd… As a patient, shouldn’t I have access to my full chart? I have no idea what the rules are on that.
Either way, I didn’t push it, because I didn’t really care. I kind of wanted to be able to go through them, as I did with the ones from OSU. But considering how well the interviews went, I doubt there’s anything that would be surprising in there.
(And even if there was, it’s nothing bad enough to stop me from donating. So, why would I want to read anything surprising or bad if it doesn’t affect me? It would’ve been nice to read good things, but I already felt good about the interviews. And I was approved by the mental health professionals. Can’t that be enough?)
So, I’m letting that one go (getting that part of my chart) without any fight at all.
Anyway, back to the main question at hand – asking my donor coordinator about my next steps. She said the next good step is to talk to my primary care physician and see how he wants me to handle it – with a nephrologist, or what he wants to do.
I didn’t have a primary care physician (which I guess is kind of silly…).
So, I got one – a physician based out of UCLA, hoping if I kept it all in the UCLA family that might keep things easier. The first one I tried wasn’t taking new patients. I asked the donor coordinator if she recommended anyone… He also wasn’t taking new patients. Finally, I found a doctor with some room for new patients – in about 3 months.
I took that three-months-away appointment. February 2nd, 2015.
As far as what I thought about, well, I thought about the same stuff I think about during marathons.
Running is how I analyze and deal with problems. It’s how I work out any anger or confusion toward myself or anyone else. It’s the time when if I have problems with anyone in my life, I try to think about what I could’ve done (or what I could do) to be better in any way – a better friend, worker, whatever.
If I’m mad at anybody or myself or even just a situation, I put on a mean song and run to it. That’s the way I try to vent any negative emotions.
In this race, I also kind of thought about the future. What kinds of things do I want next? How will I get them? (I had lots of time. Might as well reflect and plan.) It can be stressful, but also good to think about the future…
I also just enjoyed music for part of it.
I heard some songs I hadn’t heard in a while and thought, “oh yeah, I love this song!” (“Obsessed” by Mariah Carey gave me a total jolt when I was tired. I really do just adore that song.)
I also paid attention to some of the genius engineering on some Michael Jackson tracks – seeing how many different instruments/parts I could pick out. (Bruce Swedien is a freaking mastermind. I would love to work with that man.)
I even thought silly thoughts at some point.
I know Christina Yang is a fictional character. She’s totally not real and not working that awesome job. And yet, somewhere almost 40 miles in, I thought, “I really hope she’s happy at that dream job. Goodness, I love her.”
Basically, the day was lovely.
There was also a point in my last couple of laps where I looked up at the stars.
Someone who’d done the race in years past gave me a heads up that at night (especially for people coming from the city) the stars out in nature were really beautiful, and you should make sure to look up at them and enjoy them.
Those words echoed in my brain in my final laps. Since I was almost done, I made sure to look up and enjoy every bit that I could.
Originally, I thought I might do some live instagramming or tweeting of this event. But up in the mountains, I had terrible reception!
If I was in my cabin, situated correctly on my bed, holding my phone at a certain angle, I could get enough wifi to barely get online with a super slow connection speed. (Basically, I was able to send an email to my dad once the race was over, just to let him know I survived.)
I didn’t go up there thinking I was going to try to cut myself off from the world, but that’s what I did. And it was amazing.
I didn’t realize that was something I wanted until I got it.
For most of the race, I was engaged – in thought, or in the moment looking around, or talking to other runners who’d run with me for a bit.
But every once in a while, I’d get a bit distracted and I’d kind of want to see what was going on on twitter – but I couldn’t.
And it was so refreshing to live in the moment, and to not be able to really get distracted – to have to pull myself back in to the moment and what was going on at the time.
I don’t know if you read about my first marathon, but it was a disaster (a disaster!).
It took over 15 hours. 15 hours is more than enough time to do a 50-miler. So, I thought it would be really cool if I could finish my first 50 in less time than it took to do my first marathon. That was kind of the reach goal.
Ultimately, my main goal was to finish (healthily). But if I could do it in under 15, I thought that’d be pretty rad.
I was keeping in mind that it was on a trail, and I was at over 4,000 feet altitude (when I live at sea level). Plus, I had a small cold. (I know. Boo hoo, right?) Since I had some small things working against me, I thought I’d feel out the day and just see how things went.
Well, my first lap only took about half an hour, and I was pretty comfortable at that speed. After the first lap, it was on like Donkey Kong! Let’s hit that 15-hour mark!
I just tried to keep a pretty steady pace going. I’d quickly stop for fuel and be on my merry way.
I kept track of my laps in my phone by counting 5 groups of 5 laps each. That’s how I broke it apart to think of it in pieces instead of one big 50-mile race.
Originally, my goal was to only take real breaks in between the groups of 5 laps, but it didn’t work out that way. I took breaks when I needed them.
I took my longest break (which I think was still only about 10 minutes or so) after the first marathon was done. I used the bathroom, threw back some Gatorade and maybe a few snacks, and I even took a couple of pictures as though to say, “Yay! Look, the marathon’s done.”
And then it was back to work.
Speaking of pictures… Well, let’s get into that next time!
Thank goodness I left early! Friday traffic was much worse than I expected. So instead of making it hours early, I made it just in time for the dinner.
Yes, that’s right, the dinner. This wasn’t just any normal race where you show up and do it. Since it was up in the San Jacinto mountains, a night in the cabins was included in our race fee! Not only that, but we had communal dinner and breakfast with everyone, which was sweet!
Everyone was so nice at dinner, and it was fun to get to know everyone a little beforehand.
Then I got my packet and room assignment.
In my cabin, I picked a top bunk (’cause I think bunkbeds are super cool, and I thought as someone not doing the hundred mile race, I should be one of the ones to climb to the top.
We all talked a bit and got to know each other until quiet hours started at 10pm. I’d gotten into the habit of going to bed early all week. I knew if I didn’t, I’d be in for some hurting when race morning came.
Once the morning came, I rolled out of bed and over to breakfast. I had a half of a banana while people around me were loading up on pancakes and syrup. I didn’t want to overdo it with the calories, but I started eating quickly into the race. Very soon I understood why everyone had been eating so much around me in the morning – 50 miles (and especially 100 miles!) is kind of a long way to go.
The course was a two-mile loop that we ran over and over. Part of it was through sand (even though we weren’t by a beach). There was a little small stretch of road. Every time I hit the road, I was so comfy and happy to be off the trail that I’d try to jog that part, even I was walking the parts around it.
At the end of each loop was a huge clock telling us how we were doing, and a huge stand full of so much food (oh so much food)! For the first number of loops, I’d mainly just grab water (though I did stop in my cabin pretty early for a small vegan cookie). That was one thing that was awesome – our cabins were right along the course. We could stop for Gatorade (or vegan cookies) or whatever our little hearts pleased, as often as we wanted.
The story of my first 50-miler starts tomorrow. (Yay!) But before we get into that, let’s get into some of the questions I’ve gotten so far.
1) Why do you want to do a 50-miler?
I loved the feeling of finishing a half marathon… And then I finished a marathon and it felt even better. Then I finished my first (surprise!) 50k and somehow that felt even more incredible! I thought I’d try a longer race and see if the feeling kept intensifying.
Also, I like to continually push myself in new ways, so I wanted to try a cool new thing.
(Lastly, I realized my first half was in 2009, and first marathon in 2012. So naturally in 2015, I had to go up to the next level (nearly doubling the distance again).
2) How did you train?
Irresponsibly!
That’s a bit of an exaggeration, but I don’t think I did quite as many miles as I should have to have trained totally in earnest. However, I supplemented a lot with strength training (which proved to be incredibly helpful!). I’m still not super strong, but having a stronger core/back/arms will help to keep you upright and feeling powerful when you’re getting tired.
I also tried to just be as active as I could in life – walking to more places, always taking the stairs – that kind of stuff. I think that was helpful too.
I’m sure there are plenty of training plans out there. And when I do a 100-miler, I’ll probably have to take it a bit more seriously. But once I finished my 50k happily, I tried to just sort of continue to work at that level (and slightly above it), and hope that my legs could carry me the extra miles on race day!
(Sorry for setting a bad example… But I did finish! (Strength training will take you so far!))
3) What did you learn/what advice do you have?
I touched on this yesterday. So, definitely those two things – pick the right shoes, and get used to fueling. (Eat enough to keep you going, but not so much to make you sick.)
Lastly, I’d say pacing is important. (I know everyone says that. But they say it ’cause it’s so true.) At the end of mine, I felt that had I pushed myself, I probably could’ve gone a bit faster. That was a bit of a bummer, but I would’ve so much rather had that than having gone out too fast and hitting a wall hard.
I saw some people have to go down to shorter distances after they went out fast and hurt themselves. So, as with any distance race, pace yourself to the best of your ability.
If you have any other questions, please let me know. And we’ll get on to my personal experience tomorrow!
Soon, I’ll be writing all about my first 50-mile race experience!
But before we get into my journey and how I felt, I wanted to write some semi-practical posts for the people thinking about doing their own 50-mile race.
Let me start with the two main things I learned/difference between a 50-miler and a marathon.
1) The food/fuel!
I felt like during the 50-miler all I did was eat! (That’s not totally true, as there was plenty of time I wasn’t eating… But goodness it felt like a ton of food was going into my body (partially because there was a ton of food going into my body ;).)
As with marathoning, everyone fuels differently, I’m sure, based on a number of factors (weight, fitness level, speed, etc.). The generality I’ve heard is that you should be taking in 250-300 calories/hour(!) during a 50-mile race.
There were times I didn’t necessarily feel like eating. But I knew if I wanted to keep going strong, I probably needed to at certain times. I also had a schedule in my head of when I’d get Gatorade… and I upped that due to the heat that day.
So, as far as the fuel goes, all I can really say is it feels different. Because I was going at a slower pace, it was tolerable to have to eat so much. But it was indeed a change of pace.
2) The shoes!
Ah, the shoes. I love my Aasics Kayonos – love and adore them to pieces. I wear them on the treadmill and in half marathons and marathons, and they treat me so well.
However, for me, they do not seem to be the shoes to wear on trails and sand and whatever else came my way. I had so many blisters at the end. It was recommended to me to go to A Runner’s Circle and get fitted for trail shoes. I think that’s probably a good idea.
So, be cognizant that your ultramarathon shoes may not be the same as your marathon shoes. (You’d think I would’ve learned this by now. But now I think I for real have.)
Those were my biggest lessons. And I’ll get into some of the questions I’ve heard next time.
After we got off the phone, I thought about it and tried to process it. But it just didn’t sit right. So, I sent an email.
(Yes, it’s been well established I can be a bit intense and stubborn sometimes.)
I thank him for the phone call and then say, “I know we just talked about it, but I’m having a bit of a hard time accepting it lol. Are we absolutely sure there’s nothing else I can do to better affect the 24-hour urine collections?”
I tell him, “I don’t want to be one of those people who doesn’t deal well with failure. But I’m just curious if there’s anything, anything at all, I can do… Sorry to bug you and thanks so much!”
He kindly writes back and says it’s not a failure. He asks me not to look at it that way. He promises he’ll look more into it as well. He reiterates we need to table the donation issue and focus on me. He says, “As I said, I do want you to participate in some of the kidney events that we are planning to do.”
[I forgot to mention this in my last post with the jarring phone call. He had said that since he knew I loved running, and volunteering, and such, that I might be a great person to help out with an upcoming kidney run.]
“And please stay in touch. You are an amazing human being.”
That last part was obviously very sweet and kind – to say I’m amazing. And it did help soften the blow a little, I guess. (Oh, compliments… always butterin’ me up.)
I get that he was just trying to be nice and come up with great alternative ways for me to feel like I’m doing something. And I so appreciate him for that. But it didn’t change that in the moment, I felt like, “uuuuugh. Can’t give a kidney. Relegated to the sidelines. I feel so small…”
So, that’s pretty much where things left off with him.
I want to actively be more creative. I always talk about how in high school I performed all the time. Well, high school’s over. And I live in Los Angeles, California! (Where you could probably perform everyday if you wanted.)
I’m tired of saying things if they don’t mean anything/if I don’t do anything about them. So I say I want to be more creative? Well, let’s do a project about it then!
Both of those did what they were supposed to do. I don’t volunteer as much now, but I still do. It seems easier to say yes after doing 52 events in 52 weeks. I still run races too, with one coming up in July.
I thought this new project would fit well with being more creative. And I’m hoping it pays off the same way. I guess we’ll see in a year!
I’ve been playing with the idea of doing this for too many weeks – maybe even a couple of months. I asked myself the same questions that always come up with these projects. “Is it going to be worthwhile?” “Am I going to have enough time?” Blah blah blah.
Of course it’s gonna be worthwhile. Not every performance will be life-altering or spectacular, but just getting up in front of people – forcing myself to act in something or write something or just do something… it’s gonna be good.
As far as time, you make the time for things that are important. What in my life could be much more important than writing/performing? I want this to be my whole life! So if I can’t make time for it once a week, well, I’m doing something wrong.
I’ve done a couple of things here and there – did an improvised monologue at a friend’s improv show (as part of the form they were doing). Then, karaoke broke out at this bar where a Hollywood assistants mixer was happening and I performed at that.
I did a friend’s sketch show last Saturday. Then I happened to get Wednesday night off work. And I already knew where karaoke was (because Wednesday had also been the night of the mixer). So, forget it. Forget trying to wait. Let’s do this!
I played Sally Ride at a Living History Exhibit at Woodlawn Cemetery (where she’s buried).
I booked the gig in sort of a roundabout way. I obviously basically want to act in anything anytime anywhere. I saw a listing on Backstage.com looking for women to volunteer to play historical figures.
Yeah, I’ll come be Sally Ride for no pay. Let’s just get back in the habit of doing this again! And let’s meet some other actors. And all that great stuff!
So, I wrote in saying I’d love to play Sally Ride. I think I may have been the only one who wrote in, because they gave me the gig with no audition or anything. (I was later told I was the only actress who wasn’t replaced at some point in the process. It’s really hard to get anyone to volunteer for anything and actually commit… perhaps that’s why they eventually decided to pay us – who knows.)
Once I showed up for our practice session, we got our monologues and read them for everyone. After the rehearsal, we got an awesome email saying they’d love to pay us after all! (What? Sweet business!)
Between the rehearsal and actual performance I memorized the monologue, tried on the NASA jumpsuit at the local costume store we were assigned, and learned about Sally Ride. (Did you know she was the first known LGBT astronaut? I didn’t!)
On the day of, I got there early. They had snacks and water all set out for us. (Ah, to be an actress and to be taken care of so lovingly.) Everyone started trickling in, and we all got into our costumes.
Then we were taken out to the various tombstones where we’d be performing our monologues. I stood there, waiting for the tour to get around to me, practicing my monologue in the space.
After the tour, we all gathered together and said a bit about what we liked about the women we portrayed.
What I liked was that it seemed like Sally Ride didn’t care about what other people said she could or couldn’t do. She just did stuff. She seemed like she really lived. And I love that.
As far as how the acting went, I think it went pretty well! I got compliments from strangers afterward, which always feels good!
Zonk redemption aired today. In case you were wondering, yes, I was invited… but no, I didn’t get on (in case you didn’t see it).
Since that makes this obviously a pretty anti-climatic story, and there is so much still to catch up on the blog, I’m going to save the other 8 parts until… well, whenever it’s time to post them.
But I will tell you about my experience with it. After my Let’s Make a Deal episode, I did start to wonder when they tape Zonk Redemption. I figured it would be the April Fools’ day show again.
Under that assumption, they would almost definitely tape it before my episode even aired. I wondered if I’d still be up for consideration – as someone who’d had a zonk taped but not aired.
I went about my life, and let my wonders about it fly away… until I got an email from the contestant team.
They sent me a “save the date” email that said, “We’d love to invite you to the taping of the show!” But it also said, “Please respond to let us know if you’re interested.”
The way it was worded made me wonder… “They’d love to invite me… if they can?” “I should let them know if I’m interested? Not if I’m coming – if I’m interested.”
I know that’s getting a little persnickety on wording, but I had 3 shows on the 18th! This was my first foray back into theater in almost 3 years. I know it’s practically sacrilegious to miss a day of performances! So, if I was going to bring this to my bosses, I wanted to be sure that I really was being offered the opportunity to go.
The email was sent to me just over a month before zonk redemption happened. I emailed back right away saying I’d love to go. One week later, I checked in to make sure the “save the date” email meant I really was invited, since it was going to be really hard to get the day off work and I had to tell them soon.
Two weeks before the taping, I still hadn’t heard. I couldn’t wait any longer to tell my bosses. So, I did.
Under my Equity contract, I was technically allowed to take one sick day with no penalty. But I know the unspoken rules in regional theater. You never take a sick day! Ever. If you have to throw up in a bucket between scenes, so be it. You do not call out sick.
So, I didn’t want to take my sick day on the basis of a lie. With the mess that was my open-heart surgery stuff, I never wanted to take a sick day again in my life.
So, I chose to go in and tell my bosses the truth. I would say that was possibly the wrong decision. But how can I say it was wrong to tell the truth?
I didn’t want to call out sick at the last minute. I didn’t want the guilt, and I didn’t want to affect the show in any adverse way.
I asked for the day off two weeks before it was to happen. I said I’d help however I could. I could help them find a sub. I’d be happy to train the sub (of course). I even offered to pay the person to come in for me!
I was stage managing, not acting. So basically all someone had to do in my place was say “go” a lot during the show. It was easy to read my script. I knew a sub could come in semi-easily…. Or so I thought.
I asked him, “What can I do? Tell me what to change. What should I eat or not eat? How should I work out, or change my habits?”
And he said, “There’s nothing you can do.”
[*sound of my heart cracking down the middle*]
He told me this was just the way my kidneys function (improperly), and that there was nothing I could change. He told me I had a lot of healthy habits that were great. And all I can really do is watch and see if the problem gets any worse.
I said in the last post that this was the most heartbreaking part to me. I hate it when there are things you can’t change! I know those things exist in life. But they do not make me happy. I was sort of taken back to the way I felt during my heart issues. I know it’s obviously not the same thing, but I remember the worst part of that was being powerless.
I hadn’t thought deeply about my heart issues in a long time. It was amazing to me how in an instant I could be transported back to this all too familiar feeling that I hadn’t felt in a long while.
Dr. R said at some point, we may be able to do some tests to see if we could get to a root cause. He said he does want to figure out what’s going on – as, it is odd for someone my age, without any risk factors, to have high protein in her urine (since that’s one of the early signs of kidney disease). But at this point, it’s just nothing to be too terribly worried about, or to take immediate action on.
When he told me we’d have to close the door on kidney donation, I held back tears on the phone. I was just so sure, oh so sure it was going to work out. I really believed it would. And to hear it wasn’t, and that there was nothing I could change… I was in disbelief.
It hurt. It hurt so much.
So, we got off the phone (and those tears flowed immediately!). And this is where I’ll pick up next time.
BI mentioned on this very blog about two years ago that if you’re not following comedian Richie Moriarty, you’re missing out!
And I still feel that way. And he did his first improv show in Los Angeles on February 28th. Obviously I had to go. Let’s get real. This is @richietown here!
I tweet with him every once in a while. (I know, #SoFamous ;)) And when I was talking about how much I wanted a show in Los Angeles, he told me there was one!
When I arrived at IO West, from the other side of the street, I saw him walking with his whole crew of guys. What? Richie Moriarty as I live and breathe?!
We met at the door and I practically screamed out, “Oh my god. You’re my Justin Bieber!” He laughed, said he was happy I came out (who, me?), and said to say hi after (who, me?!).
At the end of the show they announced onstage that they’d all be going to Outpost, this close-by bar. So, I thought, “hmmm, basically this whole audience has been invited to the after-party. And I’m part of the audience… So, uh, I’m invited, right?”
Well, I went and hung out in the bar/lobby area (where everybody hangs before/after shows). I saw Richie. We talked a bit. He was in high demand. After a clutch conversation (I never say say clutch, but I like it here for some reason) – he had to keep working the room.
But he was a total sweetheart taking an interest in this stranger’s (my) life. After we were done talking, I made my way around talking to other people. Everybody seemed pretty nice and cool and fun. So why not stick around to meet some strangers?
As the guys had said it would, eventually the party moved to Outpost. One of the guys in the cast asked me if I wanted to come along. Wait. I’m invited? Heck yeah, I’ll come along!
I said my one dream of the night was to get a picture with Richie. This other cast member (the one who invited me to Outpost), thought that was hilarious – but he came through for me! He was all, “Oh yeah, we can make this happen.”
At Outpost, I got my picture. We all talked and danced the night away. It was brilliant.
Once the bar closed, the guy who invited me to Outpost then asked if I wanted to come to the after party! Me, still? Heck yeah, I want to go!
People piled into Ubers and we all went to another cast member’s apartment where we talked and danced until after 6 in the morning. (What?!)
It was so fun! It made me feel like I was in high school all over again – when you’re just staying up late, not worrying about responsibilities, being silly with other people. I loved it!
He let’s me know that the protein in my urine is still high. (My understanding is that it’s even higher this time.)
I’m having a really hard time hearing this news. I was just so sure, since I’d passed urine tests less than 2 years ago, that I’d pass this one.
All I’d done was get healthier in that time. I worked out more (and better). I ate healthier. My body was stronger. It seemed surreal – no way could there be a test with a problem.
I can’t remember all of the details of the conversation. The only thing I can remember with clarity is the glaring part that stuck out to me. I was asking what I had to do to fix it – what I could do to be a living kidney donor.
And he said I needed to stop worrying about being a kidney donor, and worry about myself. I was no longer a potential kidney donor; I was now a kidney patient.
What?
He told me not to be worried. I wasn’t in any immediate danger or anything. He didn’t want to make things sound worse than they were. Nonetheless, he still wanted to stress the seriousness of this.
(Mmm vegan “chicken”.)
He let me know I should have a nephrologist keep an eye on me – that I should probably be tested every 6 months to a year, to see if the problem gets any worse.
He talked about the possibility of maybe being my nephrologist, if I wanted.
Again, so many thoughts were swirling, there wasn’t any real planning or decision-making happening in this phone call (other than his decision that I’m a “kidney patient now, not a kidney donor”).
[*eyes look down sadly and wistfully*]
While on the phone with Dr. R, I mentioned having peed in cups. I mentioned doing the ultramarathon. I even mentioned getting my deep tissue massage that week.
(Only after my massage hurt so much did I look more into deep tissue massages… I read in some articles that if deep tissue massages are too deep, they can push more protein into your urine… Of course that was from the random internet rabbit hole. What does the internet really know?)
Anyway, I mentioned everything I thought could’ve even maybe had an impact on my test. But he said none of that should’ve affected it. He said we could technically do the test one more time, but the chances that things would be different (after two results in a row of elevated protein) were slim. So, he didn’t recommend it.
And then came the most heartbreaking part of it to me, which is where I’ll pick up next time.
For me, I think the point(s) of these projects is to strengthen habits I’d like to get in to, and to expand my world view – learning/trying new things, meeting new people, and all that fun stuff.
As far as the habits I’m trying to strengthen, basically I’m trying to be a well-rounded person. For me, I basically think of that of a strong foundation of 4 pillars:
1) Creativity
2) Athleticism (Or at least just taking pretty good care of your body)
3) Service/Community (Engaging in helping to make the world around you better, volunteering, etc. (In the words of Michael Jackson, “Heal the world. Make it a better place…” I don’t necessarily mean it in the sense of being involved with your local community, but humankind in general (though that often can be helped through the local level).))
4) Smarts (“Intellectualism” sounded too stuffy. “Academia” made it sound like it’s all about school. But basically, I just mean learning more, being aware of the world around you (and hopefully at least semi-well-read), and able to form some thoughts/opinions/and all that jazz.)
If you think I missed anything in the pillars, please let me know! I always love to hear other opinions on this kind of stuff, and get more ideas.
Anyway, it seems I’m kind of going a pillar at a time. I think the half marathons definitely helped strengthen the athleticism – as I still run and have gone on to broaden what I do there (such as ultramarathons and obstacle courses).
And I believe (though time will tell) that this project helped strengthen the service/community pillar. As I mentioned yesterday, it didn’t feel like quite as much of one big project. So, I think that may have made it less of a habit-building year for me. But I still did it enough, that volunteering has made it’s way into my pretty regular rotation of things to do.
As far as how this will grow or change in the future (as the half marathoning grew into the other stuff), I’m really not sure right now.
As I mentioned in one of my halfway posts, it’s a real bummer when you don’t do anything. As I also mentioned, I loved doing new stuff. So I think I will probably focus on activities where either it really looks like I’m gonna get to help and/or I get to do something I haven’t done before (or haven’t done often).
I do think having a lot of responsibility is fun. And it might be fun to do a longer-term project where you have a real role (such as helping to plan an event). I don’t know that that will happen anything in the near future. But it’s something to think about!
Overall, I’d call this a good project. I’m happy I did it. And now I like to think I hopefully have two pretty strong pillars (of the four I mentioned). How to strengthen another one? Hmmmm, I’ve been thinking about that. So, let’s talk about it sometime!
In case you missed it, I finished! All 52 volunteer activities complete (within the 52 weeks, of course). [*Does a little dance*]
(It ran February 20, 2014 – February 18, 2015.)
So, what thoughts do I have to give now that it’s over? Well, my thoughts from the midpoint have not changed.
Here they are: Part 1 – An Interesting, Enlightening, and Worthwhile Project Part 2 – Some of the Meh Stuff, Like When You’re Not Needed Part 3 – A Little More Meh Stuff, Like Needing An Occassional Attitude Adjustment Part 4 – Lessons I’d Take Away For Volunteer Coordinating
Really, those are all the main thoughts I have on it.
Other small things are that sometimes you could stay later to be more helpful, or you’d want to stay later to talk to people, and if you scheduled yourself for another thing you wouldn’t always have the time. So, it’s nice to give breathing room when possible. (You definitely won’t always need it, but it can be nice when it’s there.)
Also, even though it’s easy to volunteer at most things, there are some where you really have to plan ahead of time. For instance, I tried to volunteer for the Boston Marathon (2014 – within the year of this project). I’d always wanted to and loved any excuse to go back to my old neighborhood. But I think it was a lottery system or application or something. I forget the specifics, but know I didn’t get picked.
(If you want to volunteer at a Disney race you have to sign up early as well.) So, the in-demand nature of certain volunteer positions was also interesting to me.
Lastly, here’s a kind of over-reaching thought now that I’ve reached the end of this project…
Not that I need to compare this to the 52 half marathons project, but since it’s my frame of reference, I will.
One thing I really liked about the 52 half marathons project was that I really felt like I experienced the whole year I did it. Sometimes years go by and I think, “What? How did that happen? Wasn’t it just January?”
But during the 52 half marathons project, it felt like a year. I did tons of traveling and planning (and running, and more). The year felt long (in a good way) and full.
So, I thought doing another 52 in 52 project would help 2014 to feel that way.. But it didn’t feel quite the same.
During the running project, there were some weeks I didn’t have a race (and some when I had multiple races). But for the most part, I was probably doing a half marathon during at least 3 weeks of almost every month.
With the volunteer activities, I’d do a bunch in a short time, then I wouldn’t do any for a while. Flipping through my calendar, it looks like there are multiple times where 5 (or even more) weeks went by where I either didn’t do any activities, or I maybe did one in that whole time span (of over a month!).
I don’t think I did the project “wrong.” It was just different. And it didn’t feel, I guess, as overarching as one big project as the 52 half marathons did. Again, not bad. Just different.
And I’ll pick up with one more post about this tomorrow.
I didn’t do much of anything the rest of the night, so that I wouldn’t have to do anymore pee transporting in restaurant cups (aye, aye, aye).
The next morning (October 11th), I woke up early to get out to UCLA and turn in my pee – in time to turn around to Pasadena for my monthly morning Mensa board meeting (of the LA chapter) .
I turned in two full containers to UCLA. The woman in the lab said, “I can’t believe so much could come out of such a small person!”
I was still very much new to not being quite so fat. Even at the time you’re reading this, I still might be getting used to being thinner. So, anytime anyone calls me small, I throw a ticker tape parade in my head – making that interaction really fun for me.
For anyone following how many millions of times I talk about Native Foods Cafe in these posts (they don’t give me anything to mention them, I just love them) – alas, they were not open before I had to leave Westwood. (That’s why I mentioned the detail about that morning meeting I had to get to). Oh well. I’m sure there will be many more visits to UCLA.
(Spoiler alert: There won’t be another one until much later than I thought.)
I thought I’d done everything right. I didn’t work out at all for 5 days leading up to the test. Heck, I barely even had any protein! I was eating carbs, carbs all the time – just in case.
On October 13th, I got an email from my donor coordinator saying Dr. R would call me with the results.
Wait, what?
I kind of assumed I’d get a happy email from her asking me to set up my final urine collection after this one came back in the normal range.
I didn’t think it was a good sign that I had to wait for a doctor’s call. That usually means bad news if you have to hear something straight from the doctor, right?
I tried not to worry too much about it. Maybe he wants to call to give me the good news! I don’t know.
When I don’t hear from him after a day or two, I reach out to my donor coordinator asking when I should expect the call. Then I find out he’s out of town.
One of the things I found really helpful in 52 half marathons project was doing a bonus 53rd race at the end.
(I mean, technically it was ridiculous, and my body was so tired. And I sort of hurt my back a bit. So, I’m not sure it was the smartest thing ever. However…)
What I liked about it was that looking back, I think it would’ve been sort of easy to say, “Project done. So tired. The end. Get out of my face, running.” But I think by then doing another race that wasn’t totally part of the project, it helped propel me forward into keeping the habit of running going.
(After all, isn’t that kind of the point of the project? To strengthen something about my life that I wanted to work on? (Not to just do something then abandon it.))
So, I felt I needed to do the same thing with the volunteer activities. I found a listing to help this place called The Maker Guilds (part of a place called The Exploratory). The goal is to provide STEAM (Science, Tech, Engineering, Art & Math) to under-served communities.
Maker Guilds was holding an event at a library in Hollywood where kids would learn about Rube Goldberg machines. Only one child showed up and there were three of us there to help. So, the teacher asked if I wanted to try my hand at one. Do I?!
So, basically, this wasn’t so much of a volunteer event as just playtime for me – fun (albeit stressful) playtime.
First, when I was given the contraption, I was told the lever needed to move to hit the cart to make the cart go down the ramp. My first instinct was to have something going across that would make the downside of the lever jump up instead of having something from press from above to make the other side of the lever go down. (Does that make sense?)
Apparently most people start with figuring out a way to get the level to go down, not up. So, when I started with my way, one of the main volunteers there said, “Wow, we’ve got a genius with us today!”
Okay, well that is a lot of pressure!
I used what I was seeing another volunteer do as inspiration to help me better understand the thought process behind certain things. Eventually, I did get mine to work. Then I built back to make it slightly more complicated. Then I got it to work… one time. I tried to duplicate it, but there was never quite enough force to do it again. At that point, the activity was almost over. So I couldn’t go back to the drawing board to try anything new.
It was a bummer not to be able to re-create it (with the new beginning), but since I could do it with extra steps (but not so many extra), and since I was able to do the more complicated way at least once, I’m just gonna call it a win. Is that cool; can I have that?
Then I helped carry the supplies out to a car (the one really volunteer-y thing I did. And that was number 53! We’re done, baby.
Soon up – a conclusion post about the 52 volunteer activities.
I was a little excited for my “would you rather” question. Even though I know they’re pretty silly and don’t really matter in the grand scheme of things since you’ll never need to answer in real life, they’re still fun.
I easily knew my answers to some of the ones being asked around the table.
There were a number of them I found pretty interesting – would you rather lose your sight or hearing? Would you rather lose your hair (without the possibility for it to grow back) or your sense of smell?
I feel like there are legitimate sides your could take and debates you could make about pros and cons.
Then my question was, “Would you rather have your skin turn purple or blue?” Come on now! Those both sound terrible. How am I supposed to get hired for anything with purple or blue skin?
That question was the first thing I said. Then someone piped up and said, “Well, with blue skin, you could at least in Avatar and The Blue Man Group.
Smart.
So, I went with blue. Some opportunities are better than none. (And yes, I suppose technically with purple skin you could possibly make your own opportunities. Anything is possible…)
Anyway, enough with the ice breakers. We moved on to the main activity.
It was all about seeing your life in the future. There were 10 questions all about where you wanted to be in 10 years – what would you like? Where would you live? What transportation would you use?
And then you got to draw a little 4-drawing story on the other side to show something that’d happen in your life.
(In case your wondering, mine was my Broadway debut. It was me onstage with the ghostlight looking at an empty theater, excited for butts in the seat, then people in the theater waiting with anticipation before the curtain comes up. The 3rd photo was my curtain call. And the last one was my dad and high school theater teacher waiting to take me out for dinner.)
We went around the table as each girl told us about her upcoming life. It was crazy to hear some of them say things such as “Well, in 10 years, I’ll be 24 years old.” It was also slightly crazy to hear some of them react to that realization with, “Oh my gosh, I’ll be soooooo old!”
Yeah. You’ll be ancient when you’re 24. (I know I totally just said that with sarcasm, but in Los Angeles, I don’t blame them for feeling that way. I sometimes feel that way!)
Anyway, it was interesting to hear how packed full of hope so many of the stories were – and how vivid some of the pictures were. I know we were supposed to be there to help them, but I think seeing the world through such hopeful and vivid eyes is perhaps something they helped to show us.
Children of the Night is an organization that rescues children from prostitution. (You can read about the organization here.)
There is a group that goes in once a week with a new creative activity to help the children/teens.
I totally believe in using creativity for good, and I think it really can do a lot of good. So, I was in to go help out and see what this was all about.
When we got there, we all met on the sidewalk. We all gathered as a group 1st so that people wouldn’t need to be buzzed in to the building one by one. Everyone was super nice.
Once we went in to the lobby, we signed in and there was a little speech given about the rules before we were let into another layer of restricted area (the one where we met the girls). The rules were basically:
No photos inside, since you never know who’s looking to kidnap these girls back.
No touching unless it’s initiated by one of the girls – no hugs, no high-fives, no handshakes, no nothing unless she initiates it.
No talking of the past. They’re here to move on. So, we wanted to stay away from the past. We were told that if one of the girls brings up her past, we can talk about it with her, as we don’t want to shut anyone down. But we were not to bring it up.
At the beginning of the night, we played an icebreaker game. One of the group leaders had printed off innocent would-you-rather questions he found online. Each person around the circle would be given a different question.
One was “would you rather be able to change the past, or be able to see the future?” As soon as he started reading “change the past,” I felt this sense of “Uh oh. Didn’t we just hear these rules?” I know he did it on accident, but you could feel the tension on the volunteer side of the table as the girls erupted into opinions. It was definitely the most talked about question of the night.
Ultimately, the girl who answered said she would not change the past because she loves who she is, and she doesn’t know whom she’d be if she’d had a different past.
I thought that was an incredibly… I don’t even know what word I’m looking for. I don’t want to say grown-up answer because I don’t want to sound patronizing to her (or make it sound like grown-ups have it together). But it just seemed very self-aware and kind to herself.
I mentioned last time how happy I was to get a Mensa event in (as it had been a smaller side goal of mine)!
On Friday night, I worked at the registration table. And my job was to keep watch of the money box. I’d worked registration tables before, but hadn’t been in charge of the money during any of my 52 volunteer activities.
Of course, this makes sense. I was always a stranger, so who’s gonna trust me? But I think here, since I’m on the board and everything, they were cool.
(Side note: I guess thinking about it, I was responsible for taking some payments at two different silent auctions. So, I have done some semi-money handling during this project. Still, I think this was my first time with the cash box.)
Of course, I gave them no reason not to trust me since the money all balanced out… Granted, most people payed with checks so that wasn’t really all that hard.
I logged everything I took in. I gave everyone the correct stickers to get into whatever they were buying. And I had a partner at the desk help me make sure everybody was getting their sticker. (Teamwork makes the dream work, after all, right?)
The only thing that could’ve made this a little better would’ve been a cheat sheet for what things cost. We kept having to look it up on our phones, which was fine. I hardly know how to function without my iPhone. So, of course she worked beautifully. But, I think one cheat sheet with prizes would’ve been cool.
(Just thought I should throw that in since I’m always looking for ways to make things better, since this 52 in 52 project has also helped me to better plan events and empower volunteers (if ever I have a job to do that).
The registration table is a pretty nice place to work since you get to meet a bunch of people. I’d be open to doing it at this event next year.
So, there you have it. #51 down. One more to go!
And I’ll have one more post (unrelated to volunteering) all about the conference in general.
I went to a Mensa Regional Gathering that lasted for a 3-day weekend, and I did various things throughout the weekend. So, I almost counted this as #51 and #52.
After all, even though it was the same organization, it was over different days and it involved different activities. Couldn’t that count? Well, I didn’t want to do anything on a fine line. So, I’m gonna put kind of the leftovers from the weekend here, and we’ll do “real #51” (an activity from the weekend I hadn’t yet done) next. Sound good? Great. Let’s do it!
I’m so happy I finally made my way around to volunteering at a Mensa event. I’ve been on the board for over a year and a half, and I had yet to really get involved in any meaningful way. So, this was pretty lovely.
Some of the extra things I did over the weekend included:
– Helping serve food at dinner.
(I’d done that for a previous volunteer activity – which actually kinda helped me learn how not to spill bean juice (when I ended up on beans again). So, that was pretty cool. Learning, baby!)
I got to stand next to some fun silly people also helping to serve food. And we got to serve some fun people as well. I forget how it came up, but I mentioned I went to Berklee. And one person said, “Whoa. Berklee?! That’s like the MIT of music schools!” And I was all, “Oh, thank you so much.” Then he said his wife went to MIT and he went to Harvard, so we were all kind of Boston buddies. And I just thought, “Yep. This is a Mensa convention all right.”
Speaking of the food, I’d heard this was the first year that they had someone in charge of vegan and vegetarian options, and I just want to say bravo! We got Veggie Grill one day and Native Foods (my favorite!) the next. There was so much! And I never like to let any Native Foods go to waste. So, my stomach was practically bursting by the end of the weekend. (Sorry, stomach.)
– Speaker shepherding
Basically, we just needed to make sure speakers got to their rooms and had everything they needed. And sometimes we gave a little intro. My speakers were so on top of everything. They had their set-ups down to a science, and they were in their rooms early. So, conceivably I “helped” by being there, but I didn’t do much.
– Working with the kids.
Yet again, I felt there wasn’t a ton I needed to do here. There were plenty of other adults in the room watching the kids and helping them with various activities. I did get to answer a few questions here and there for parents. So, again, I kind of sort of did stuff. I mean, I did give my time. So, I guess that was something. But, ultimately, I basically just played with the leftover frosting in the kids’ cookie decorating class.
And we’ll get to my real 51st volunteer activity next!
So, that Friday, October 10th, I did my 24-hour urine collection.
I volunteered at the Long Beach Half Marathon expo that day. I figured that with a shift that was only a few hours long, I’d be able to get there and get back without having to pee.
(During my first 24-hour urine collection, I volunteered at a pirate night without any issues. I guess I must’ve drank more water this time around or something.)
In the middle of my time at the expo, I felt I kind of needed to pee, but figured I could still hold it ’til I got home.
I hadn’t peed much at all during my first urine collection. So, on the one hand, I was trying to remedy that, and make sure I stayed hydrated. On the other, I couldn’t pee until I got home. I didn’t find the right balance.
Once I felt I had to pee, I really slowed down on water, but it was a bit too late. Toward the end of my time at the expo, I was feeling it.
As I left, I thought about what to do. I almost just called a car to go home. But I kind of thought even though that would be faster, that sitting would be worse than standing on the train – I really had to pee at this point.
So, I went toward the train. But there was construction happening, so there was a bus transfer… I saw getting home was going to take way longer than it normally would have (which already would’ve usually been an hour).
I didn’t think I could wait until I got home.
As I mentioned, UCLA’s paperwork said you could use a different container. So, I figured using a different one for an hour or so couldn’t be awful. I ran into the nearest coffee shop I could find, bought two of the biggest empty cups they had, ran into the bathroom and filled them both up with pee.
I thought I was being generous with space, buying two cups – yet I still had to pee once they were full! But I could at least wait on the rest of it ’til I got home.
Then I had to very carefully get on the subway. This was so embarrassing carrying around two pee cups! Granted, I’m pretty sure most of LA smells of urine, and I’m sure crazier things have been carried on the subway. So, it was fine.
I just certainly didn’t want to spill any. (How embarrassing would that have been?) So, I handled them with extreme care.
I did indeed make it home without any crazy incident with my pee cups. The first thing I did was pee out the rest (since, in the hour or so it took to get home, my desire to pee grew and grew).
As far as how I contributed, there wasn’t tons for me to do. I did get to answer a question about Garageband. (I got to show how to bring up automation for volume, so you could change the volume levels throughout a track.)
That one felt especially cool because before the program started, as we were setting up, I familiarized myself with the new version of Garageband (since some of the computers were running that).
One of the things I didn’t immediately see how to do was show automation for your tracks. I thought if there’s anything these students are going to ask (since it’s helpful to working out your arrangement and not immediately visible in the program), it’s going to be how to change volume, panning, etc. throughout the track (that sweet, sweet automation).
So, I looked it up. And wouldn’t you know it, that’s the exact thing that came in helpful later! “Aurora do you know how to do this?”
“Oh, yeah.” [*Confidently walks over*] Just go up to “mix” in the menu. Now “show automation.” Great. Now you can choose what you want to see. You’re looking for volume, which is the default right here.
Ba-bam!
And that pretty much covers my entire contribution – showing someone how to do one thing (which google could’ve done, but let’s all choose to believe I’m cooler than google).
The students were surprisingly self-sufficient. I guess I shouldn’t say surprisingly, as I know high schoolers are smart. I just remember being at Berklee and one of the first classes you take is intro to Music Tech.
I studied up for a day and tested out of that class. But still, as was mentioned (by other people) earlier in this day, Berklee is one of the best music schools around and even they have to acquaint much of the incoming student population with Garageband. So, I dunno. Maybe I’m behind the times or something, but I still thought it was pretty impressive that these students had such a great grasp on it.
We (adult mentors) walked around a bit, looking at their screens, trying to see if anyone needed help and was perhaps too quiet to ask. But everyone was happily working away on their own.
Basically, all around applause – to the students working so hard, and the school for offering this, and especially Lauren and Harley for running such a program. What a volunteer activity! This was truly lovely.
I thought this program was pretty darn cool. It sounds like what they’ve been doing for the past few weeks is having musicians of different instruments come in, and record some stuff. I guess they talk about their instrument and life as a musician. Then they all laid down tracks in the same key at the same tempo.
Now that there are plenty of different things to choose from – different drum kits, brass instruments, vocals, electronic sounds, strings, and such – all the tracks were set up in GarageBand so the students could go through them and decide what they wanted for their song.
Some people were going after more of a techno feel. Some were going for more acoustic. It was incredibly cool to see the ways different people could take the same options and make things that were totally different.
Then, once the students had their jumping off point, they got to write their own part for their instrument that they’d add to make the song even more their own.
Before we even started working in Garageband, the afternoon was started off with the people running the program telling the high schoolers about a couple of song contests they could enter. I thought that elevated everything to an even higher level of awesomeness. ‘Cause not only are we gonna make some music here. We’re gonna have a goal to add to it.
I also thought something that was quite interesting was that immediately after the contests were introduced, the first question (phrased exactly like this) was, “Can we collaborate?” The first instinct wasn’t to try to one-up everybody else in the class. It was to work together. I thought that was probably a testament to the kind of program Lauren and Harley are running.
(Don’t get me wrong. I’m slightly obsessed with competition and being the best… I still thought it was nice though that the students wanted to work together.)
Let’s think back to almost a year ago. For the 3rd of my 52 volunteer activities, I helped tear apart a school’s library in Watts, as part of its renovation. We were told they were going to transformation it into a creative space that could be used in various ways.
Well, I saw a listing looking for someone to help on the tech side of an after-school music program – helping with GarageBand and such. Well, I did study Music Production & Engineering at Berklee College of Music. I think (hope) I know enough about GarageBand to help most high schoolers.
So, I happily signed up. (At the time I signed up, I didn’t know where the school was – just what they were looking for.)
I’m sure you probably see where this awesome story is going. The program was held in the new renovated library space! I got to see the finished product, and I got to see that the school really was using the space to do creative things with students after all!
It tickled me and warmed my heart so much to be present for that!
So, that’s the most amazing part of the story, but now I’ll get into the actual event itself.
It was slightly nerve-wracking for me to go help with music stuff. There were three other amazing adult musicians there. So, uh, who am I? And they always introduce new people to the students (of course). When I was introduced, they said, “She studied Music Engineering at Berklee College of Music. I don’t know if you know this, but it’s one of the best music schools in the country.” Then, one of the other leaders of the group jumped in and said, “One of the best in the world.”
Okay, that is obviously true (and awesome – I kind of love when people get all impressed about where I went to school). But it’s still a lot to live up to!
So, all that’s left are the 24-hour urine collections.
Being that my medical tests in Ohio were fine, the protein in my urine must’ve just looked elevated because of all my working out. That had to be what it was, right?
Dr. R wasn’t concerned. I wasn’t concerned. We were sure it was just a fluke, as he even said exercise can make the tests results look like something they’re not really.
All during September, I was on a crazy show with tons of constant schedule changes. (For anyone who’s wondering, I was a Segment Producer on Living with the Jacksons – yes those Jacksons. Just ask me about Jermaine. ;))
It was my producer credit 0 and I was the one one, aside from the EP. So, all the segments, all the logistics, all the guest cast people; all planned by yours truly. If you need a producer, I’m your girl!
I was working overtime – super overtime. Basically, I was always working. (Not to oversell it, but I think it may have been the toughest job I’ve had.) I never really knew when I could get to the lab. (I know. I hate excuses too.) Sure, it was open 7 days a week. So, at some point, I should’ve been able to make it work…
But, you know [wah wah], we were not a Monday – Friday job. We were a “possibly anyplace, anytime” job. A lot of times we’d get days off (or new days on) at the last minute. Since the schedule was ever-changing, even if I could’ve made it to the lab, I certainly never had the 5-day advance notice to know not to work out.
(And here’s a shot from that 50k obstacle course)
Also, I think if I hadn’t worked out for 5 days straight on a show that stressful, I may have just straight up died from it. (Probably not… but you never know.)
So, as much as I wanted to keep the ball rolling, I just couldn’t make the next test happen until October.
I’d gotten a free entry to this crazy 31-mile(!) obstacle course run on October 4th. So, I decided I would do that and then finally take the 5 days of no working out. I wanted to push myself to the max so that hopefully 5 days would go by pretty quickly.
And it did.
The only thing that was a slight bummer was I wanted to stay in Ohio for just a couple of days more. But, I wanted to make sure I did my urine test right on day 6 (after 5 days of rest). (I didn’t want to take any more workout time off than I had to.) UCLA doesn’t use any remote labs. So, I had to be home basically by the 9th to grab my container and start my test on the 10th.
(I couldn’t have stayed in Ohio that much longer anyway, as I started my new job on the 13th. So, I wasn’t missing out on too terribly much.)
At UCLA, for the 24-hour-urine collection, they say you can use your own clean container if you want (e.g. an empty gallon of water). I did that the first time, but I preferred to just use the one from them this time to be extra careful. So, on the 9th, I trekked over there and got a container (and some delicious Native Foods Cafe – which became one of the best things about trips to UCLA).
Side note: Later on the way back down, we kept going on the road to see what would’ve happened if we’d turned left. Not much happens. It doesn’t go that much farther. You do get a pretty nice view of the front of the sign, but it’s not all that close up.
One group of hikers we’d passed on the way there suggested going around the small gate that said no trespassing. I don’t know how far they went up. It sounded pretty fun to be bad and try that… But! I didn’t want to go to jail or get fined or whatever. So, we stopped at the gate.
Anyway, going back to when we went to the right, we came around the back of the Hollywood sign. Once we got up there, it leads you to this huge fence. There are cameras up looking at you. I’ve heard if you try to jump the fence, people come grab you practically immediately.
I don’t know how it happens, or where they come from. But I’m just gonna stay behind the fence.
I was so distracted by the awesome Hollywood sign in front of us, I didn’t even notice at first that there was another little hill behind us where we could get an even better view!
So, we climbed up the back of that one last hill. Then we started in with the picture taking. We each gave various fun poses in front of the sign. When they added the panorama camera to the iPhone, I’d always kind of wondered, “When will the panorama really come in handy for me?” Well, I finally found out! The panorama is the perfect thing for the Hollywood sign!
After we took approximately a million photos, it was time to head back down. But first I took a few seconds to just take in the beauty – not with a camera, just look at it with my actual eyes. And that was really nice.
We made our way back down the mountain. On the way down, we say people taking a sunset horse tour which seemed sort of interesting. I didn’t realize horses like to ride at the edge of the mountain. That seems a bit scary. But people were having a grand ol’ time, and no one got hurt (as far as we saw). So, do your thing, horses.
Charles and I had started the hike probably around 3pm, which seemed to be pretty perfect timing. We went up as it was cooling down outside. (It was still pretty warm, but at least we got the tail end.) And we got down to the bottom just as it was getting quite dark.
A lovely day. A lovely hike. Yet another thing in Los Angeles complete!
One of the first things we passed was a skateboard area that people were using to their heart’s content. What a cool little out-of-the-way interesting skate park. I’ve never ridden a skateboard (though maybe I should), and if you do, you should consider checking it out.
We passed the skateboarders to the meat of the hike. There’s a lot of uphill at the beginning, which is lovely. It feels like a workout. (Oh yeah!)
We stopped a couple of times to kind of take in the scenery (which was pretty beautiful… sometimes). (I’ll get to that sometimes in a sec.)
Toward the beginning of the hike, it was sort of funny because we saw the Hollywood sign and it looked pretty far in the distance. This was only supposed to be about a 3-mile hike up. So, Charles thought we might’ve picked the wrong trail. (“Come on! Look at how far away that looks. We can’t be going the right way.”)
But I was pretty convinced that 3 miles could look that far away. Luckily, there were other hikers coming down. We asked them, and they assured us we were indeed on the correct trail.
Getting back to the beautiful (most of the time ;)) scenery – there were pretty views of the city. (It’s a little incredibly to me that LA feels super spread out, yet from parts of this mountain you can see Burbank, downtown, Hollywood, and more. The higher you go, the less spread out it seems. But I suppose that’s how perspective works.
The reason I say the scenery is beautiful most of the time is because there is this thick, black, totally interesting, actually sort of pretty in its own way, layer of smog that coats Los Angeles. You can see it differently from different places. It’s certainly something.
There were a couple of places where we could choose to go left or right along the way. We’d been given a heads up by hikers before us, and thankfully we always chose the right way (though I did wonder what would’ve happened if we’d turned right at one of the points… Would that trail have led all the way over to the observatory? I couldn’t tell in the vastness at which we were looking.
The one thing every hiker wanted to impress upon us was that when we get to the road, we turn right. So, once we got there we dutifully followed.
There was this cool night AE I worked with on a Project Runway spinoff who kept inviting me out on group outings and such.
I felt so bad because I’m always complaining about how no one in L.A. wants to do anything. (It can be so annoying!) Yet, here I had someone inviting me on multiple fun adventures, and every time I had to say no (mainly because The Jacksons ran my life for a couple of months, which I loved and all… point is, I couldn’t hang out).
Well, we still stayed in touch, even though he’d pretty much given up on me being a cool hang out person. But alas, when I wrote him to say, “hey, cool newsletter you sent out to people,” he asked if I wanted to do something!
Wouldn’t you know it? We were both funemployed (that’s just a happy way of saying unemployed), so sure! Of course I’ll go hang out in the middle of the afternoon on a Tuesday because why not?
I went to the red line station by his house. He said, “What do you want to do?” Then he started listing a bunch of things. “Eating? Movies? Hiking? Golf?” (I don’t know that he actually said golf. I sort of forget everything after hiking. The point is, he gave multiple options and seemed like he was up for basically anything.)
Another super cool friend of mine had recently instagrammed about hiking to the Hollywood sign (and she got a sweet picture). I asked if she’d give me the trail she hiked on, and she happily texted it me. Since that was fresh on my mind, I said, “I’d love to go hiking! How about to the Hollywood sign?”
Even though I’ve lived here for 3 1/2 years, and he’s lived here for 7, neither of us had hiked to the Hollywood sign before (which seemed a little preposterous to me, so I’m glad we remedied that).
I whipped out the webpage my friend had given me. Thankfully, you could click on parking directions and they opened in google maps. Griffith Park is huge. So, the directions proved wildly helpful.
I didn’t realize ’til later that for whatever reason, only part of the web page was showing up on my phone. Once we got to the parking area, there were a few different trails you could enter. I kind of wondered why the web page wasn’t super specific about which trail you go on. Later when I opened it on my desktop, I saw it was wildly specific. So, my bad on that.
We asked some fellow hikers which trail to take, and soon enough we were on our way. This is where I’ll pick up tomorrow.
I’ve given the tips and asked my curious questions, but now it’s time to just talk about my experience during the day.
I can hardly believe how many times I’ve passed both LACMA and the Page Museum when I used to live in that area, but never went in. Finally, it happened! (About time, Aurora. Eeesh.)
As far as LACMA was concerned, one of the things I really love about it is how big it is. I got to do a fair amount of walking, and that was quite lovely.
I heard a tour going by and listened to to the docent describe one of the paintings. She was really interesting (and therefore good at her job). The person I was with had taken some classes in art history. So, everything he was hearing about Picasso was boring common knowledge to him. To me, I found it pretty riveting.
This is perhaps a sign I should take an art history class or go to more museums and/or museums more often (than once every two years or something)… Realistically, I don’t really think either of those things are going to happen. However, I can still enjoy the bits and pieces I pick up here and there from errant museum docents around town.
My favorite piece in the museum was a little statue of baby angels with the girl rough-housing the boy trying to take the crown for herself. Get it, girl.
After LACMA, my friend and I went to the food trucks across the street. There were so many! (I hope they all made lots of money that day – basically I hope everybody who could made money off of free museum day… I know the smart girl scout who stood out by the food trucks seemed to be doing pretty well. Great job, m’lady.)
I ate a Kale Grilled Cheese because I live in Los Angeles. And where else are people going to be eating kale grilled cheeses?
After that, we headed to the Page Museum. It wasn’t as big as LACMA, but the coolest part about that was that there’s this worker fishbowl area where you can see scientists working on projects!
Do you think they love, hate, or are indifferent to people staring at them working all day? I’m going to guess it’s not one size fits all. They probably each feel differently. I bet it’d feel cool and slightly stressful at the same time. It would possibly eventually get old… But it also might go in waves where it gets all exciting again.
Anyway, that pretty much covers free museum day. As I’ve already covered, we could’ve done it better. But not bad for a first try. Got to see some art and see some scientists. I’d call it a lovely day.
So, am I angry because I’m fearful that part of what she says may have some truth somewhere in it?
I like to think not. I like to think it’s purely out of what I feel is injustice… It’s a hard question to ask myself though.
Of course I have flaws. And I want to be better with many things. But the Ohio psychologist picked flaws I wasn’t even really considering.
And is that maybe the problem? That I can already list for you things I want to work on, and when she lists this new stuff, I wonder if I have an incorrect view of myself. Am I seeing myself in the wrong light?
I know there’s that whole thing that there is no true one version of you because people see you differently, but there is still, I think, a generally agreed upon version of who someone is. And am I way off base with who I think I am?
Ultimately, I don’t think so. (Am I going in circles here, or what?)
Mainly, I don’t think the mental health people in Ohio liked how stubborn I was. And I already know I’m stubborn! And we just have fundamental differences in opinions on the other stuff.
Yeah, there might be days when I am a little irresponsible. Heck, I admitted being late to one of my appointments! But I’m not irresponsible in the way she thinks I am. She thinks jetting off for two months is irresponsible? I think if I’m not working, I might as well go have a ball! So, we will just have to agree to disagree.
And I am happy that people at UCLA saw me more in the way I see myself. All I can do is continue to try to be better person all the time. I’m not perfect. I never will be. And if someone disagrees with me on the ways in which I’m imperfect, well, as I said at the beginning of this, I have to let it go.
Cory Booker says a quote a lot that’s something along the lines of, “anger is an acid that only eats away at the vessel which holds it.” So, I will do my best not to be angry anymore about those Ohio meetings…
I do find it hard sometimes. It’s not like I think about it all the time… but when I’m reminded by kidney stuff out here, I do get that little twinge of grrrrrr.
So, I will try not to be angry. I will try to completely let it go. And I will very much try to never mention the Ohio psychologist or social worker again in any more posts (unless there is some legitimate reason I feel I need to).
Thanks for letting me just kind of talk this out. And if you have anything to add, I’d love to hear in the comments!
I recently learned that once a year there is free museum day in Los Angeles! (This year it was January 15, 2015.) Tons of museums participate.
It’s a pretty cool idea, huh? To get people out and about to museums they might not otherwise go to. (I’m curious if the museums end up making even more money on the free day, but I’ll hypothesize about that later.)
For now, I’m here to give you the tips on if you do free museum day yourself!
1) Take public transportation
Parking in the parking structure by LACMA was so ridiculous (not that you would’ve had any better luck with street parking). We made it in, sure. There is a lot of room. But, we waited for around 20-minutes in what seemed like a never-ending line of cars crawling along the road.
I didn’t care that much. I was with one of my friends and we were jamming out to oldies. However, my word to the wise is just take the bus. A lot of museums are so easily accessible on public transportation. So use it.
2) Pick the museums that don’t have other free options!
LACMA was very cool and big, and I’m glad I got to go. But, it is already open to residents of Los Angeles Mondays – Fridays after 3pm, and it’s free to everyone on the second Tuesday of each month. So, this was kind of a waste in the sense that there were other museums (such as the one for the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, showing the Hollywood Costume exhibit) that didn’t have free days listed! Aye, aye, aye.
But, we also went to the Page Museum while we were in Museum row. I didn’t see any other free days for that. So, at least we did something right! We did try to go to the Hollywood Costume exhibit somewhat early in the day. But, tons of people had already gotten timed tickets.
So, I guess if you are smart enough to pick one of the museums to which you can’t otherwise get free admission, there may be a bunch of other smart people on your wavelength. You should perhaps consider seeing if you can book those free tickets ahead of time (as people in the Costume line said they did).
3) Maybe use the morning to your advantage (strategize, perhaps)
We arrived at LACMA approximately an hour after it opened and only had to wait in a very short line to get our tickets. I don’t know if there was perhaps an early morning rush right as the museum opened. But I do know that later in the afternoon, the line looked crazy. We went to the Page Museum in the afternoon after LACMA, and the line was crazy there. So, apparently there’s a rush later as either more people make their way up and out of the house, or maybe as they go to their second stop.
So, if you’re going to multiple museums that are close to each other, you might want to get your tickets/stickers/wristbands (whatever they’re using) before you go into any museum. That way you don’t have to worry about spending time in long lines later.
4) Bring single bills if you want to donate (and maybe cash in general)
The museums will ask if you’d like to donate a dollar for entry. You’re obviously free to donate more or nothing at all. But if you think you might like to donate a dollar, think about bringing singles as it’ll make it easier than getting change (as you want to keep those long lines moving).
Also, if you go to Museum Row, there will be food trucks everywhere. Many of them take credit cards. But think about bringing cash if you want, to make things easier.
That’s everything I can think of when it comes to free museum day… If you have more advice (or if you have questions), please give ’em to me in the comments. And now that I’ve given my tips, I’ll talk more about the day soon!
Hmmm. It’s April, and this project ended in February. Think it’s about time I catch up on these events, or what?
The homeless count is conducted to try to get a sense of the number of homeless people living in our city, so the government can have a sense of how much money to allocate to various areas.
My understanding is that the LA count takes place over a few different days. (LA’s quite large.) Judging by this article, it sounds like our count sounds may be a little different from counts in other cities. (Or maybe it’s the same and I just don’t have a full overview of the program since I participated in one area on one night.
For out count, we were instructed not to try to engage any homeless people. We were given pamphlets that had information on some programs, and we were told if anyone asks us about what we’re doing, or asks for help, we give a pamphlet.
It sounds like some other cities conduct surveys, seeking out homeless people and asking them questions (and possibly trying to get them services right there?). Again, maybe a different group in our city does that to. But on our night, in our area, we didn’t.
Basically, we all started by meeting up in a conference room downtown. There was a short presentation on what the night would be like, and what we should be counting. (There were spots on the form to count vans people lived in, tents, etc… And of course, there were spots for people themselves.)
We went around the room and introduced ourselves. Then we split into groups of 2 – 4 who each took a different area of the city. Most of the areas available were in downtown, but there were some to which you’d have to drive.
Get this! This was possibly one of the coolest things I’ve experienced since I’ve been in LA. When some of the leaders of this activity asked who was available to drive, you could hear rumblings around the room of nearly everyone saying, “I don’t have a car” or “I didn’t bring a car.”
It was glorious! It seems so many people out here use cars to drive 3 blocks. But downtown, ah downtown has the people with the metropolis mindset. Mmmm
I was paired with a lawyer, a former bodyman for a now-disgraced politician, and the guy who started Peddler’s Creamery (a super cool ice cream place downtown). What a group, huh?
We traversed every corner of our area – including going through all these alleys I never even noticed. (And our blocks were right by apartment! How did I not notice any of these alleys before?)
It rained a little, but not enough to be bothersome.
Some homeless people were on bikes. So, I don’t know if some maybe got counted twice (if they biked to another area and another group saw them) or maybe not at all (if they never happened to bike in the same place people were counting).
There are criticizers of the method of the homeless count. But we did the best we could, and hopefully the count was accurate enough to get the necessary funding to continue working on this problem.
The woman who ran the event was a total hoot! She was practically doing stand-up comedy as we were waiting to be assigned into groups. So, seeing her at the end to give her our tally sheet was a welcome bow on the evening.
Even though it was generally sad to go around counting homeless people, a lot of them were actually laughing and talking to other people. Seeing that happiness was nice. And spending a few hours getting to walk around (in the sweet, sweet darkness without the crazy sun all up on my business) with a totally interesting group was quite lovely.
So, Disney had this great rotation going. A cast member would come to you when you’re a few people back in line. She’d introduce herself and offer to take your phone camera. Then she’d go up there with you and grab a picture as the MarathonFoto person took one as well.
I really applaud Disney for this awesomeness. It’s amazing they even had cast members taking photos at all. They could’ve easily said, “Hey, you want a picture with the character? But the professional one.” But no. They helped up in getting ones on our phones.
And I’m sure tons of people still bought a whole bunch of professional photos. Also, I don’t know if Disney makes any money off of those photos, or if perhaps only MarathonFoto does…
Also, I thought it was very smart that they had rotating cast members so phones were already in people’s hands as runners stepped up. That shaved precious seconds off everyone’s photo-op time. Being that the lines were so long, those seconds counted. And I appreciate Disney for giving them to us.
After over 25 minutes of waiting in line, a very nice cast member took my photo. I liked in the photo that the storm trooper was giving me an extra mean body position (since I was dressed as Luke Skywalker).
As soon as I grabbed my phone back, I ran away so hard. I was not about to see those balloon ladies!
I think that was the first time I’ve ever done a 5k that took over an hour. It was a very odd feeling to know I’d been out there forever, but not much of the race was complete.
Once I started running while in the back of the pack, I saw all over again all the things I always say about Disney races. It’s hard to maneuver. It’s hard to run sometimes. But hey, as long as I was ahead of the balloon girls, what did it matter?
The rest of the race was somewhat uneventful. I did make up some time, which was good. I saw some awesome signs and spectators. (A few even gave out delicious snacks, which was very kind.)
We passed “A Newhope” street, which I thought was funny. (‘Cause “A New Hope”… Star Wars.)
The medals we got were modeled after the medals of bravery in Star Wars… I love Disney and the attention to detail and inspiring messages that company always gives.
After the race, sweet Jaime waited with a sign yet again. (She’s so lovely.) And we went to fantastic Denny’s yet again. (Mmmm.)
There, we met a runner with his own crazy story of having to run out of the Chewbacca line (after waiting over 30 minutes!) when the balloon girls passed. It sounded rough… There were some fake Chewbaccas out in Anaheim during the race. At least he had some low-rent options he could turn to, if he’d wanted.
After the race, Jaime and I went to Bar Method (an incredible workout place, if you don’t already know) and dinner. After she late, late Sunday night (into Monday morning), I slept the entire next day away. Mmmm, sleep.
So I’m waiting in line for a photo with Darth Vader. Today, it curled around instead of being one continuous line. I don’t know if they changed that because of yesterday, or if that was because it was always the case. Either way, it was still plenty long, but was harder to feel/judge this way.
Ahead of me, I saw two people from corral A(!). I asked (half-jokingly) eesh, how long is this line? Thankfully (as I’d hoped), they’d waited in the two other long character lines as well as this one. So, that’s why they still weren’t even through the 5k when the rest of us riff-raff in other corrals showed up.
As time went by, I started to get a little more nervous. The sun started peeking out. I saw all the runners go by. And the joggers. Then we saw the walkers. We started seeing people with the last corral on their bib. I found it pretty nerve-wracking.
Some people in line were relaxed. “Ah, don’t sweat it. We’re fine. We’re fine!” But the girl in front of me was also nervous. We kept peeking around a far off corner (to the best of our ability) to try to find the end of the crowd. We did not want to see those balloon girls!
But at this point, once we’d already put over fifteen minutes in on this photo, we couldn’t very well give up now, now could we?
My feeling became, “Okay, if I see the balloon girls, I see them. I never have and I don’t want to, but if I see them, I’ll just jump out of line, jog ahead, and get them in my rear-view.”
Knowing I was waiting an inordinate amount of time for a photo, and I’d only get a quick shot at it, I stood in line practicing the facial expression and body position I wanted. I felt a little silly, but with as fast as the line was moving, I wanted to make sure I was ready to hit it and run.
While we were all waiting in line, we saw Darth Vader leave for one of his breaks. The loudness of the grown of the audience was incredible. Thankfully, the moment Darth Vader disappeared behind the door for his break, he came right back out. Ah, Disney Magic.
I also heard a runner going by all of us and say that there was another Darth Vader stop later in the race. I wasn’t confident enough that that was true to leave the line. But goodness was I going to feel like a total schmuck if I saw another shorter Darth Vader line later. (Thankfully, I never did see another Darth Vader photo stop.)
Once I got to the front of this one, there were probably five rotating Disney cast members helping with photos.
After the 10k (and Denny’s), Jaime and I checked into a hotel across the street. Yes, I live in LA, which is not far from Anaheim. But we still hotel-ed it in between the two races, because, you know, 5:30 start times. We immediately fell asleep after we plopped on the beds.
Once we got up in the middle of the day, we went exploring downtown Disney. We shopped; we ate; we lived like happy tourists.
We went to bed at what would usually be a reasonable time. Of course, when you’re getting up around 4, there’s practically no reasonableness. So, I was still a bit tired in the morning. However, I let the adrenaline of the day and being there with a good friend perk me up. So, it was all good!
Also, the hotel moved their continental breakfast to be hours earlier just so racers could partake! I thought that was a really nice, kinda extra special thing. So, thank you Anaheim’s Maingate Ramada!
I made my way over to the race. (This time, since we had a hotel, Jaime slept in. After all, she’d recently had a long bus trip in from San Francisco. The least she deserved was a little extra beauty sleep.)
One thing that was kind of interesting to me in the first mile was that I’d been commenting back and forth on instagram with someone who was all, “Hey, I’m here too! What corral are you in? etc.” And in the sea of thousands of people, I happened to see him during the race – not in the corral when we could’ve actually been looking for each other. But during the race, I looked over and said, “Wait a minute! You look like a picture on instagram I saw this morning!”
Just thought that was a little random and funny, and figured I’d share.
Within the first three miles of this race, I saw three popular characters – and three very long lines. First up was Luke & Leia. I’d wondered where they’d been the previous day. Well, here they were!
I stepped in that line for a hot second before I thought, “I don’t have time for this. Also, my orange might look weird with their white. I don’t think this Luke/Luke picture is gonna be cool as my Boba/Boba one from yesterday. So, forget it.” Off I went.
Then, I saw a super long line for Chewbacca. As I’d opted not to wear my Chewbacca dress for this race (next year, baby!), I passed him as well.
And that’s when I saw him again. Darth Vader was back with his stormtroopers. The line was pretty ridiculously long, just as it had been before. But today, dressed as Luke Skywalker, come on. I had to.
So, I jumped in the long line. And this is where I’ll pick up next time.
Since we just talked about getting my final approval from the mental health professionals, I want to touch on that whole thing one last time.
Then, I need to, in the words of Bobby and Kristen Anderson-Lopez (through the mouth of Idina Menzel), Let It Go!
There have been many times throughout this new UCLA story when wonderful things happened and people liked me, that I wanted to say, “in your face,OSU!”…And at times I did.
Now, I don’t think I’ll ever change my opinion about feeling as though I was judged unfairly. However, while you can’t control how people treat you, you can control what you do in return.
Are you really going to keep holding a grudge, Aurora? You know Cory Booker, one of your role models, would not condone that kind of behavior. I know. I know we should be kind and forgiving.
But there’s just a part of me that has such a hard time reconciling that this person(/people if you count the social worker too, which we can) thought I was basically this irresponsible, agitated, dumb girl.
And I don’t think that’s me. And it’s so vindicating when other people (in those same roles as those mental health professionals) also don’t think that’s me.
A photo with Cory Booker… who’d also probably say to let it go
And I know we all have good days and bad days. And if you see my in my worst moods, you might think I’m agitated too. (Hopefully you’d never think I was an idiot, but even smart people can come off dumb sometimes.)
Anyway, maybe I was having a bad day. Maybe the psychologist was. Maybe it was both! Maybe a million things.
Also, I’ll concede that I was on my best behavior at UCLA. I was still absolutely me – judging partly by the fact that both the social worker and psychiatrist here commented that I seemed competitive, or like an overachiever, or a type A personality. I cannot completely hide who I am.
Sure, maybe if I were literally acting (not just being on extra good behavior)… like, as someone in a play, I could try. But as me, in an interview about me, no matter how much I dial me down… I’m me. Still… the careful-est me I could be. So, maybe these people wouldn’t have liked me quite as much if I hadn’t been on the edge of my seat, holding my breath, careful.
But for the record, I think they saw more of “me” than the OSU people saw. Yeah, I was careful. But I was also happy (not agitated – just as I like to think I usually am not). So, you win some, you lose some, I guess.
And I don’t know why this has gotten to me so much, really. Obviously I’d say the main reason is because I was denied from being a kidney donor because of an interview. I’m usually good at interviewing! And, well, I’ve alreadyexplainedmanyreasons I’m upset…
But on top of all those (in my opinion) normal and valid reasons, since I am having this urge to say “See? See!” every time people do see me the way I hope they will… is there some underlying stuff still bothering me?
Is there a part of me that worries that maaaybe I am any of the things she thought?
Is that why I’m trying so very hard to ram home the point that she’s wrong – out of some insecurities? Do I worry I actually am irresponsible, because maybe I’m not doing enough with my life? Do I worry that maybe I am a little dumb? (I do not do well in Geography Jeopardy! categories… (and some other ones too… College football stadiums? Yeah right.))
Do I worry that I’m not evolved enough to play her game? I do not do well in the position of weakness. As much as I want to say, “I’ll just try to never be in a position of weakness,” that is impossible! You have to learn how to persevere when you’re in those situations.
And when the social worker and psychologist at OSU made me feel so small, I pushed back! But would a better person have just taken it, been small, and been okay with it – especially knowing it was for the greater good (of giving a kidney). That experience was practically the definition of winning the battle, but losing the war.
Was it my fault (not theirs) that someone in need didn’t get a kidney?
The one thing I’d read a lot about both of these costumes was the tendency for them to ride up. So, I tried to use the safety pins, my bib, and the bottom of my sports bra to my advantage. Granted, it took me forever to pin my bib on, going through multiple clothing layers, but my costumes stayed pretty well put when they were attached to other things holding them in place. So that was nice.
It seems I picked the correct order of costumes for the weekend, because Boba Fett was out at the 10k, but wasn’t out the next day at the half. And of course, a picture with him was fun (since I was dressed like him)!
I ran by some characters earlier in the race without stopping. (The line to meet Darth Vader absolutely shocked me. I should drop it in this post, ’cause I can’t get over it.)
Once I saw Bob Fett, I thought, “why not?” So, I jumped in a long line and made conversation with the guy behind me. I felt a little like a nerd at my first in-race photo stop, but I embraced that nerdiness! It’s the Disney Star Wars race. If you can’t be a silly nerd here, where can you be one?
The line moved really well. A nice man snapped my picture, then boom, off I went on my merry way.
As I was jogging, I saw someone else in a Boba Fett outfit. I asked if he stopped for a photo with the character, and he said no. He told me he’d seen the balloon girls earlier while waiting for another character, and that scared him into wanting to book it the rest of the race.
Thankfully, by the time I saw him, he’d far outrun them, as they were nowhere in out sights.
(In case you don’t know, the balloon girls are the girls who bring up the end of the Disney races. If they pass you, it means you can get swept. And the thought of being in their presence was terrifying.)
At the end of the race, sweet Jaime was waiting for me with a sign. (Awww.) I went and got my medal, food box, pictures, and bag, then came back around to meet her. We saw the final runner come in flanked by stormtroopers, as confetti was released. It looked like a pretty sweet moment.
My friend Jaime came to visit during this weekend. (Yay!)
We Uber-ed out to Anaheim at some crazy time of morning, around 3am-ish.
When we got there, we made our way through downtown Disney toward the start. As we passed the finish line area on the way to bag check, we saw that Disney was showing Star Wars on a TV screen there, which I thought was pretty awesome.
Basically, between the expo and various places at the race, it seemed to me that they had a Star Wars movie playing practically anywhere they could – which was very nice since it had been a while since I’d seen any of the movies.
Once we got to the bag check area, Nsync’s “Bye Bye Bye” played as the DJ was telling everybody to get outta there and start making their ways to the corrals. I’d never been at a stage far from the start a half hour beforehand. So, I’d never seen that little transition.
It was fun for me – mainly because how can you possibly go wrong starting the day on an Nsync song? (Granted, that wasn’t super Star Wars themed. But come on. There has to be other music and stuff in there somewhere.)
I wore my Boba Fett outfit for the 10k. My reasoning (as if there needed to be any) was that I had one costume from a more dark side character, and one Jedi (X-Wing Pilot Luke). Ultimately, I wanted to be good. So, I’d wear the one from the dark side in the shorter race (getting to spend more time as a good guy). (Kinda silly to have put that thought into that, huh?).
When I looked at those costumes on Amazon, I was a little terrified but took the leap anyway. (As per usual, I was planning my costumes at the last minute and didn’t have tons of immediate options. So, I just went with it.) I generally don’t like wearing things that are tight around my stomach, but thankfully in races you always have the bib to help you hide things a little – and the Disney bibs are big.
But throughout the day (both days), I was concerned with how I was posing – trying to do my best to hide my stomach, and stick out anything else that would hide it. The hilarious thing about this is that the photos that came out best were candid running photos where I didn’t have time or space to worry about that.
I think I used to take half marathoning way too seriously. And I didn’t even take it all that seriously. Even still, I was too serious, I think.
When I’m super slow, “running” 3 hour and 15 minute half marathons, I should really be running in costume and playing around. I do understand the idea that everyone starts somewhere and we all can push to be better. But goodness. I used to think, “who would wear a costume to a running event?!”
And now I do it every year at Rock ‘n’ Roll LA. And I’ve finally done it at Disney as well.
I had a hard time picking my costumes. I had some money available on Amazon.com, so I went a’looking.
There were some normal costumes, and then there were some girly versions that added skirts (to things such as Boba Fett and Luke Skywalker – which are the costumes I wore).
I felt a little like a traitor getting the girl versions, ’cause I know those are so ridiculous. If I’m dressing as Luke Skywalker and he wore pants, why wouldn’t I just wear pants?!
Well, I don’t know. ‘Cause I’m kinda lame? I can’t really give you a good reason. I just wanted to wear a dress, so I wore a dress.
Speaking of dresses, I also got a Chewbacca dress in case one of those other costumes didn’t work out, and it’s quite possibly my new favorite thing. The other ones were absolute costumes. There was tutu-like material sewn in. But the Chewbacca dress looks like a normal dress (other than the fact that there’s a bullet design that runs around it, like the one he wears).
It fits well. I love the cut. (I love the cut? Who am I, semi-talking fashion?)
I wore it to the expo and got approximately a million compliments. It is a little short. And it doesn’t have sleeves (and oh how I love sleeves). So, I don’t really feel like I necessarily have the normal amount of fabric to cover me. But it still worked out pretty okay.
Even after the 10k, I switched back into the Chewbacca dress to walk around downtown Disney (since it was still Star Wars themed, but a little more understated/normal to be walking around in). Yet again, everyone loved it, and I loved it. There was love everywhere.
I thought about wearing it for the second race (especially since everyone was fighter pilot Luke in the first race – which is who I was planning to be on day 2).
Alas, ultimately, I decided not to because:
1) I don’t like to run without sleeves, and I didn’t have a great shirt to wear underneath it.
2) I also didn’t have any type of Star Wars/Chewbacca hat. I’m certainly not going out there without something covering my head during the race. But I don’t want to have something completely unrelated to my costume distracting from it. So, I went with the Luke costume that came with a hat.
But next year, Chewbacca all the way baby!
I know it’s hard to believe, but we will talk a bit more about costumes next time.
Yes, I know we are pretty far behind real-time, since I’m writing about January events in April. But between game shows and kidneys, it happens, I suppose. Just go with me?
At this race, I broke 2:55 for the first time! Last year, I had a goal of 3 hours – and missed by 34 seconds. Guh!
This year, I was thinking it’d be finally nice to grab that previous goal – especially on such a tough course. But I wasn’t sure if it was gonna happen. Usually, I’m way more training-heavy in November/December than I was this year. This year, the cable was out in our building’s gym for what seemed like forever. (But seriously, it was such a long time!)
Obviously, how in the world could I possibly be expected to work out without game shows?
Anyway, it all sort of went downhill from there. I had a bit of a lazier December than usual. Not crazy lazy, but lazy enough.
Then, on race day, I kind of woke up at a weird time and couldn’t go back to sleep. I was all over the place and was feeling like it might not be my day. I didn’t announce to the world that I was going back for that 3 hour goal. But secretly, I wanted it.
I also had a tough time really figuring out when to eat since it was a night race. None of this dueling before sleep thing.
I was trying to be pretty super vegan, but I love these chips with lime seasoning. Chips and salsa is totally my pre-race food. I have no idea if it’s really supposed to be. But it has been for me for a while now. It used to be Doritos and salsa, but you know, the whole vegan thing.
After I’d become perfectly happy with my replacement, I learned there was whey in the seasoning!
In general I’d moved to potato chips and salsa to combat that problem. However, that didn’t always completely sit well with my stomach.
So, for this race, I decided forget it, I’m going to have some whey in the seasoning, ’cause these are my chips and I want my pre-race food.
After I made my way down the street to the start line, I stretched out until it was time to start. I had a lot of kinks to work out after sitting around my apartment marathoning all the seasons of Homeland I missed. (I told you I had sort of a lazy December.)
Once the race started, I pretty much got in the zone. I just kept jogging. I told myself whatever you do, don’t want. Even on all those hills, I kept jogging.
I was feeling pretty great while jogging, but I knew I’d been feeling great last year before losing steam. So, I didn’t lull myself into a sense of safety.
At one point, I think even before the halfway point, the 3 hour pacer bolted past me! What?! How is it possible you’re already passing me? I’m watching my time. I’m in front of a 3-hour pace. And you were behind me in the corral. I don’t understand what’s happening.
Thankfully, he was only running so fast to bank time, because his group walked up the hill. I jogged ahead of them on that hill, and he never passed me again.
Even in the final mile, I was mildly nervous. I was more sure this year than last that I was going to come in under 3 hours. Even still, my clock had forsaken me in 2014. So, I kept jogging to the best of my ability, enjoying some sweet inspirational tunes. (It’s been a while since I played “The World’s Greatest” by R. Kelly – which I do when I feel like I’m doing something sweet in a race. So, it was very nice to hear that again!)
I was spent by the end. After I got my medal and food, I had to sit for a while! Way to reach the point of exhaustion, Aurora.
As soon as I got up, I went straight to the results tent. Mine hadn’t been posted, so I got in the line of people asking the guy. When “2” came out of his mouth, I wanted to cry.
I know I’m still slow. But I’m less slow, baby! And thank goodness. I have a race coming up in San Francisco in the summer where the time limit’s 3 hours!
Not only did all the bags need tissue paper, they all also needed cards from the mayor (with some personal messages written on them by various volunteers and such).
This became yet another source of confusion. People would be walking the bags over to various tissue paper stations. The people putting in the cards couldn’t keep up with how fast they needed to stuff cards in the bags. And the people carrying the bags didn’t necessarily know that some bags had cards and some didn’t, so they’d just set the bags down somewhere generally by the station. And you’d have to have eagle eyes and quick reflexes to go get those bags immediately.
Chris and I were at one of the stations, putting in cards as fast as we could. One of the bag carries noticed how ridiculously fast we were going, and thankfully asked if we needed help. I gave her an immediate huge yes. With three of us, we were able to keep things pretty well under control.
Chris gave his brilliant idea that it actually would probably be easier if, instead of trying to keep piles straight at tissue paper stations, people just went over to where the finished bags were and put cards in there – with no bags getting carried away from that station until they had cards.
Of course. Why hadn’t anyone thought of that before? Even when he said it, though, none of us went over to do it. So many people were carrying bags. There was no way one or two of us could’ve kept up with the way things were moving. And we didn’t feel like we could all go, because then there’d be these bags coming in to our tissue paper station during the transition that didn’t have cards.
So, we just stayed in triage mode – stuffing cards into the bags coming into our station as fast as we could.
Once our station slowed down a bit, I noticed a very busy station with only one person manning the cards. So, I ran over to help him. We were stuffing as fast as we could. Even still, our new station was getting out of control pretty quickly. So, I ran over to the pre-carried bags and started stuffing them, just as Chris had suggested. I went as fast as I could. Very quickly, some other card stuffers came to join me and the bag carriers jumped on board, not taking anything except the carded bags.
Yay for efficiency and super helpful people!
Of course all the bag carriers also told their stations “these are already carded” when they delivered the bags, so the stations could keep to whatever individual sorting stuff they had going on.
So, everyone seemed to be on the same page. Woot!
We wondered why the cards weren’t just part of the assembly line. My best guess is because they weren’t necessarily done in time to be part of it. Volunteers were writing personal notes on the cards when I walked in for my shift. So, I think that’s why we waited on those.
While I love to learn from the experiences and write out how things could’ve gone better, I’ll also say this was a good day, with a lot of nice people, where a lot got accomplished (and we got nice mini-workouts and free swag). So, thumbs up!
The line got oh so much slower as people had to stop for longer periods of time for us to stuff goodies in their bags. We were going as fast as we possibly could. But it couldn’t be as fast as the ol’ drop and go.
Some people were asking us (at the front of the assembly line), “Why are the blankets in first?!” I didn’t totally enjoy having annoyed people around me, because there was nothing I could do about it. I couldn’t even give an explanation as to how or why that came to be the deal.
Soon enough, we all kind of shrugged our collective shoulders. No, the whole blankets-first thing didn’t seem like the greatest idea, but at that point there was nothing any of us could do about it. People who were there were there to give and have a great day. So, everyone got back in the spirit, and we all just laughed about our bleeding fingers.
Eventually all of those bags were finished. We got to go back to stuffing empty bags. There was practically cheering about it, and the already happy mood got even happier.
Everyone in the line seemed cool, but there was one guy specifically (Chris), who had this super outgoing, sort of flamboyant personality who was totally my new best friend of the day. Every time he’d come through, I’d ask a little more about him, ‘cause he seemed so fun. And he’d ask a little about me. Once as he came around, he said, “It’s kind of like we’re speed dating, Aurora!” That got a nice laugh.
I also loved that during the event, I was basically getting a nice little workout! Someone said she felt like Lucy in the chocolate factory episode (which was actually just on at the gym the other night – so her reference was extremely fresh in my mind). And I agreed! The line went so quickly. And as people went by, we kept having to open new boxes of stuff. Then people would be running us boxes, as our resources depleted. It was actually a semi-taxing day. Yee haw!
Once all the bags were completed, it was time to put the tissue paper in the top to make them festive.
Some bags got white tissue. Some got red. They were separated according to gender.
This sort of confused me, as in my line we didn’t have any gender specific products. I later found out that they were separated based on the style of the blanket. Oh, come on. The men got more “manly” styles. I think theirs had some animal prints and such.
I want people to be happy with their bags (enjoying their styles) and all, but do we need to be quite this gender stereotyped about these care packages? Just curious…
Oh well. A nice thing is being done. No need for me to nitpick so much…. Though I totally finish up with a bit more about the finishing of assembling the bags next time (not for a while because coming up, we’ll be talking about Let’s Make a Deal…).
I’m amazed at how quickly the imaging center got me in. I found out I had to get the lump cleared on a Monday. They saw me that Friday.
I got an appointment before work (my second to last day on that job). So early. I think I was in sometime in the 7 o’clock hour. (Ouch.) I thought I’d be in an out so quickly.
Nope.
I should’ve known at this point that if it has to do with me giving a kidney, there will almost always be some extra little wrinkle.
They did the ultrasound, and for some reason it was inconclusive. How could this be? This same lump has already been looked at 5 years ago. I should’ve just had someone aspirate it then.
This time, in order to state that the lump was nothing to worry about, they had to do a mammogram as well.
But they had to wait for permission from my gynecologist to do it. (I think it’s something to do with insurance…) So, we wait for her office to open. She gives the go ahead. I have my first ever mammogram. It wasn’t even really uncomfortable. But it is weird to see the way fat on your body can me smushed in interesting ways…
Mammogram results state that the lump indeed looks to just be a little cyst. So, everything is a-okay. Thank goodness! I head to work as quickly as possible. Thankfully, I haven’t missed much.
[That was a really chill, cool, wonderful job (on Project Runway: Threads). Too bad we didn’t get picked up for season 2…]
As I’m leaving the imaging center (on August 22nd), I ask them to fax the reports to my donor coordinator. They said they would that day.
On the 25th, I emailed my donor coordinator, asking if she indeed got the reports. While I was at it, I thought I’d check in and see if she’d heard from the social worker. I tried to ask as nonchalantly as I could if everything (besides the urine collection) was in order (everything – including the social worker’s report).
She hadn’t yet received the reports from the imaging center (which was remedied soon after). And she had indeed received the report from the social worker. As long as my urine test came back without elevated protein (and I had a repeat one to confirm that), I would be a living kidney donor!(!!!)
The way the bags had been being made was that you’d put little items in on the bottom (such as stamps, toothbrush, toothpaste, lotion, soap, and a light little scarf). Then, you’d put this big blanket (that was already wrapped up for you) over that stuff – as the last thing in the bag. And it worked great. It worked great for the first part of my shift. From everything I heard, it worked great for the whole first 4-hour shift of the day.
And then someone decided to change it.
I will admit when I got to fill the one bag earlier in my shift, getting the blanket in was the hardest part. It was a pretty big blanket. So, it took some work to stuff it into the somewhat tight bag. But it wasn’t so bad. The way we did it was I held it, and the two people at the bag station stuffed it in. Yes, it took slightly longer than the other stops where people could practically throw in the small items. But in my experience, it didn’t take inordinately long.
Even still, somehow, they changed it up so that people would fill bags that already had blankets in them.
What?! Who decided this. I don’t know who decided it or how it happened. I just know that before we could do anything to stop it, we looked over to this area that was filled with so many bags with blankets. People were told they then needed to be filled with the rest of the stuff. [*head falls on desk as I write this*]
I’m pretty sure that whoever made that decision must’ve thought it was going to save time or headache. And maybe things were much tougher for the blanket stuffers than I imaged (though they still had to stuff the blankets… the hard part was the sides of the tight bag, not the bottom with stuff in it… so I have no idea how doing blankets first really made anything easier for them).
But the only thing this did was annoy, confuse, and even hurt people!
Some people were confused as to what had the small stuff in it and what didn’t, since all the other finished bags also looked, from above, just like rolled up blankets in bags. And then, when people cam through, we had to try to stuff the smaller goodies into the already tightly squeezed sides of the bag (so the stuff hopefully wouldn’t fly out). A bunch of us in the assembly line were literally getting cuts because of the plastic sides of the bags we were catching our fingers on as we tried so hard to stuff things in there. (Ow!)
A bunch of us actually bled. Yes, it’s just small cuts. No one was seriously injured. But still… I hope none of the recipients of these bags have any blood on their stuff!
And I got to talk all night with these super interesting people.
It maybe makes me sound like a worse person to talk about the practical and selfish parts… But it’s real! And the race seemed to work out just fine!)
