[*Note* this post has already been published. You have already read it. Just, as I was looking through the blog, I saw it was way too long. So, I’m splitting up and just posting the second half next to the first half. Sorry about that. Thanks!]
Picking up from last time –
I went to meet Cory Booker. And it was magical. I felt inspired. “Okay, everything’s gonna change. I’m inspired. I’m gonna get my life back together here.”
Then I had an exceptional week at work. Things really changed for me there. I got my own office(!). I *finally* felt like one of the main things in my life had gotten on the right track. Other things may not be perfect, but at least one thing was finally falling into place… And it was a huge, humongous thing – the thing where you spend practically all of your time. It was finally time for Aurora’s big New York redemption!
And then yesterday at work….*looks up and around with tears in her eyes, not knowing what to say*
Unfortunately, that’s not a story I can really share here on the blog for now. Sorry… (Maybe we can go out to Denny’s and talk about it!)
I’ll just say that what I believe can probably be described as the very best week of my professional life ended with me on the floor of my office sobbing.
(And not just one of these normal New York cries you’ve come to expect from me now (oof), because I’m overwhelmed, or because I fail at a specific thing or whatever. No, like a fall to the ground, because you don’t have the ability to even sit in your chair any longer sob – as though a cold piece of metal just got stabbed through your thigh kind of sobbing – the biggest, realest sobbing you can picture.)
I wish I could elaborate a ton on here so we could all understand. (And so this wouldn’t be so vague.) And so I’ll remember when I look back on this when I’m 80. (Though I’m preeeeeetty positive I will always, always, remember this day. I’m not worried…)
Anyway, It almost feels like I’m not allowed to love anything in New York…
And I don’t know what to say, really. Because I don’t want this to be the sad blog of sadness, or for you all to think of me as a sad person. I’m not… Or at least, I don’t think I am?… I just – I didn’t know what else to say tonight. This is how I’m feeling. So, I wrote it down, because I just – at this moment – am incapable of writing anything else.