Every year, since high school, when my friend introduced me to the three birthday questions – I’ve pondered on them. Last year I started talking about them in the blog.
They are:
1) What are you proudest of from the past year?
2) What was your biggest failure/regret/mistake (however you want to look at it) and/or what was your biggest lesson?
3) What’s your biggest goal for the upcoming year?
This year, I wanted to do them and post them back in June… And I felt a little incapable of doing that.
The answer to number 1 was easy. I became an editor on a Jon Stewart produced show. I worked hard and made it happen and I am so wildly unbelievably proud of that.
The answer to number 3 was nebulous-ish. There are so many things I want to accomplish in this life (and this year). At the time, I thought my biggest goal would be to give a kidney to a stranger (because I really want to do that, consarn it!)
But looking at it now, I don’t see that happening. I don’t have enough time to go through all the tests and everything to do it before my birthday in 2017. A lot happened this fall, and I just had to focus on finding a home. And a job. And all that jazz.
And anyway, excuse, excuse, blah blah blah. It’s not happening this year. I think a better/more realistic goal would be to say that I want to strengthen all my “4 pillars” (the general way I kind of try to live my life – athleticism, creativity, “smarts” (intelligence), and community. Now, that’s vague. So, what does that mean? Well, I’m still figuring that out a little… But I had a really rocky year that shook my foundation. So, I’d like to strengthen it.
As far as the answer for number 2, I couldn’t succinctly say what my biggest failure/regret/mistake was…. Of course it revolves around being sexually assaulted (as so much has this year). But at the time, I was just not ready to talk about it on my blog. (I never thought I’d want to talk about it. Then Donald Trump became a real contender for President. (And spoiler alert: Became the freaking President Elect).)
Anyway… I didn’t know how to talk about that. (And I don’t know which part of it is my biggest regret/failure/lesson, ’cause it just feels like there are so many emotions and things to unpack (which I am working on in therapy fo’ sure). So, it was hard to come up with a succinct answer (which apparently I’m still having a hard time doing). And it was hard to talk about it at all…
And I couldn’t think of a single other thing to put there. That is the answer, period. And I didn’t want to sweep it under the rug in this case… After all, I couldn’t even find a broom (different answer) to sweep it with.
So, there you have it – my birthday questions.