Still catching y’all up. And this is from September 2018. [Although, spoiler alert. In November 2019, I passed!]
Aye aye aye.
Welp. If you are unfamiliar with the ins and outs/rules of the Groundlings school program, you get 3 shots at each level of improv [that changes when you get to the writing levels]. So, you can fail twice with no consequences. If you fail a third time, you’re out, baby!
And they even set up the program with the expectation that you will fail. Most people fail at least level at least once if not more.
And uuuuuuuuugh, it looked SO good for a while – until it didn’t. (Eep!)
So, I leapt into advanced with the confidence of 1,000 suns shining. I was like “I’m back in LA! I’m on a good trajectory! The only way to be good at improv is to go with CONFIDENCE. LET’S. DO. THIS.”
And my midterm went great! My teacher was so positive. “You’re doing a ton of different characters! You’re adding great information! You’re doing everything you need to do! I only really need you to work on one thing. You build on what other people do so well. But you almost never initiate. You almost never ‘lead’ a scene. So, I want to see more leadership. Just for the next few weeks, if you end up steamrolling, I’ll overlook it. I’d rather you go too far than not far enough on taking up space and ‘leading’ the scene. So, just do that, and we should be good.”
Omg. Are you kidding me? I just have to do one thing? That seems simple! I can’t believe how well this is going! Amazing!
But then *falls back in chair so dramatically*, I didn’t do it.
I tried to do it, but I got out-statused. Oof. My teacher was disappointed!
I tried to do it in my second scene up, and still got labeled as lower status. [I guess you can lead a scene as low status, but I dunno. I just… I wasn’t doing well!]
And then I just kind of spun down a drain. I was so disappointed in myself and couldn’t get footing after that.
And I was taking aaaall these extra classes and power wows [kind of like electives, at the Groundlings], and it was just too much. My brain overheated and I kind of imploded, and… it all petered out.
And even my final was basically like ‘I’m sorry. But you saw how the last few weeks went. It was an upward trajectory until it wasn’t, and just, with the way it went, I’m sorry to say I can’t pass you right now.”
So, it feels possible, it just didn’t happen this time.
I’m off to NYC for the BMI school year, but next year, I’m coming back, and let’s hope for the best!