[Edited to add: I met Ben! A fantastic partner I am SO lucky to have. Everything in this post is kinda moot not hahah, but it still exists below, for fun or posterity or something!]
Okay, before I start saying anything, I just want to preface that there’s nothing devastatingly earth-shattering like what happened last time. So, don’t freak out haha. Anyway…
I was really devastated that I started 2 years after I was supposed to. I started when I was supposed to be done with the program. And I used to say something along the lines of, “I don’t know where the silver lining in all of this is. The only thing that I can think of is if I meet my Jason. Michael. Snow – my person who I just think is the bees’ knees, incredibly talented – if I meet that person, but instead of just being a fan from afar, get to actually work with her or him, then I’ll understand. I’ll see that while the circumstances sucked, it was worth it.”
And I met him! I’ve been sooooooo excited to tell you about it. But I thought I should wait – wanted to make sure everything really worked out – that it wasn’t just something I thought at the beginning of some musical partnership. I thought I should wait and make sure that not only is he the amazing person I really, really think he is – but also that I’m the person he thinks I am, and that I don’t drive him crazy and he really is my partner for year two.
I’ve been ready to tell you about “my musical soulmate” – someone I think is SO hilarious and kind and interesting and responsible and super duper talented – whose opinions very often align with mine, and who is SO so so good at dealing with conflict, even if just one of us is merely having a bad day.
And he ended up quitting (for nothing that had to do with me, but reasons that are not mine to share).
I was so sure of what was gonna happen for year two. Boom, a spark – the person I’m “meant” to work with. Couldn’t have been easier. We met in this serendipitous surprising way. He doesn’t go to the BMI bar often, and we were never assigned to work together. And yet, we found each other and it was so just – *angels sing*.
I still have about 4ish months left to pick a partner. There’s time. Things still might work out. But goodness, this is not what I thought would happen.
And this is where I’ll pick up tomorrow.